Mom thread - Page 3

OldFLDDD · #31 07-27-2018, 09:26 AM

Clothing question for the moms---we are having a hard time with figuring out exactly what is appropriate! It seems that the guidelines are quite loose and D is on a group chat with girls rushing and they are ALL over the place as far as clothing they plan to wear for the rounds where they get to choose (First two rounds are assigned t-shirts and shorts or skirts of their choice) My D is quite formal compared with a lot of girls--likes to look her best at all times, so we're erring on the side of her being a little over dressed than under, but for example, third round is "sundress" round. Seems that sundresses are either quite casual or a lot more dressy. And then Pref says "cocktail" but also "Sunday best/brunch", which are not the same thing?! I've looked around on here, gone online, etc., and again, it seems that this stuff is just all over the board. Anyone else struggling? She's just going to go into it knowing that she'll see a little bit of everything and at least won't feel "under" dressed, but we don't want her to be WAY over dressed either!

NYCMS · #32 07-27-2018, 11:50 AM

I think cocktail vs. Sunday best/brunch could be a dressy dress that isn't sheer or showing a lot of skin (low cut, high slit) - I see that as the way to cover off something in-between. Shoes are a way to add a bit of "cocktail" with Sunday best/brunch - something strappy with a higher heel.

Good example, in my opinion, would be the black cocktail dress that Meghan Markle wore for an event in Ireland this month. It had a portrait style neck and was sleeveless with a flared skirt. Very elegant and fresh, you could have worn it to a fancy brunch or a cocktail event, in my opinion. She wore high heeled sling-back pumps - I'd go with a dressy high-heeled sandal since this is a college student. Great earrings and a bracelet would finish this off nicely.

Here's a link:

https://www.eonline.com/news/950876/...-royal-wedding

I'm with you regarding erring a bit on the dressier side, including for a sundress. I think fabric can make a difference - plain cotton can translate to casual, but a dressier fabric, even in a similar style dress as a casual one, adds more flair. Fun jewelry can also dress it up when well matched.

I think it's OK to be slightly dressed up as long as it's not over the top. Hair, makeup, shoes and jewelry can go a long way to giving a polished look.

mkaytay · #33 07-30-2018, 03:24 PM

Not a mom, but a young(ish) alum weighing in (who is admittedly a recovering recruitment junky)-

For dresses, it's fine to err on the formal/conservative side. I've told rec girls that most actives meet so many PNMs every day that they only remember what you're wearing if it stands out in a bad way. There may be one or two PNMs with amazing style, but it's perfectly fine to be dressed perfectly fine.

Not knowing what school she's at and how horrible the humidity will be some general rules I pass to my rec gals:

Wear full coverage underwear, an active may be sitting on the floor in front of you. Also, run the sit test before committing to a dress to make sure it's not too short.
Sundress- what you might wear to graduation (wedges are a good shoe choice here). Pref- what you might wear to a wedding or a night at the theater (this is the day to break out the heels).
Avoid strapless dresses as you're likely to fidget with them when you're nervous and it's annoying/distracting.
Avoid backless or low cut dresses. Avoid bandage style/too tight dresses (sitting is a big issue here). Save them for date party. Halters can be okay, just make sure they aren't too low in front or back.
This is not the week to wear a romper, I know they are cute and stylish, but not every chapter will think it's appropriate, so err on the side of safety and save them for football games.
BREAK IN YOUR SHOES, and bring flip flops for walking between houses.
Have a different bra for every day. They will be sweaty and washing them in the sink at night is no fun after a long, tiring day.
Bring a claw clip to gently pin your hair up between houses and a brush to comb it back out, that way it doesn't get too sweaty.
Give your makeup a test run out in the humidity, and bring powder and blotting sheets in your bag.
Bring something to sit on in your bag so you don't stain your clothes sitting outside houses.
Make sure at the first round your hair and makeup look close to the photo you submitted with your recruitment information, as that is what actives are looking for to identify you. You can change it up a bit more as the week goes along.

EliBean · #34 07-30-2018, 05:32 PM

Thanks for all the suggestions on clothes. I have one question. My daughter found a beautiful dress for the Preference night, but it's black. My sister says no black or white, because sometimes the actives wear those colors. Is that correct? The same dress also comes in another color that would work just as well, Is she better off going with that?

Thanks!

mkaytay · #35 07-30-2018, 05:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by EliBean

Thanks for all the suggestions on clothes. I have one question. My daughter found a beautiful dress for the Preference night, but it's black. My sister says no black or white, because sometimes the actives wear those colors. Is that correct? The same dress also comes in another color that would work just as well, Is she better off going with that?

Thanks!

It varies by chapter, but they typically wear black or white. It isn't the end of the world if she loves a black dress (I wore one), but if it comes in another color go with that one.

33girl · #36 07-30-2018, 08:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mkaytay

[*]Avoid strapless dresses as you're likely to fidget with them when you're nervous and it's annoying/distracting.[*]Avoid backless or low cut dresses. Avoid bandage style/too tight dresses (sitting is a big issue here). Save them for date party. Halters can be okay, just make sure they aren't too low in front or back.

Thank you for being a youngish alumna and saying this. I see way too many instances of both of these in “what to wear” booklets and it makes me apoplectic.

NYCMS · #37 07-31-2018, 10:07 AM

I'd also add these tips in addition to mkaytay's which were fabulous and required reading for all PNM's, IMO. Great fashion advice as well from her.

1) Carry a travel size deodorant with you - and don't wear the kind that leave a white 'film.'
2) An interesting piece of jewelry can be a good conversation starter, but avoid jewelry (usually earrings) that are so large that they "swing" back and forth to the point of being a distraction. A noisy bracelet is also a no-no in my book.
3) Rush is not the time to try out a new hairstyle - go with what's already working. As mkaytay said, make sure it matches the photo you submitted with your recruitment info.
4) Make sure your fingernails and toenails are clean and freshly polished.
5) I'm not a fan of sheer fabrics as they sometimes can be see-through or reveal a bit more than you wanted. Also no plunging necklines (mkaytay mentioned this with halter dresses, but really for all dresses).
6) When in doubt, go conservative in your clothing choices.
7) Avoid any fabrics that can 'catch' on anything, like a knit that could catch on your jewelry, etc.
8) I suggest a nude colored bra so that if it shows, it matches your skin. And I'm not a fan of any dress or top where the straps constantly 'inch out' and show. If you're having to push the bra straps back in constantly, then get another dress...you don't want to be fidgeting with your clothes during rush.
9) If you wear a halter top/dress or a dress with semi-halter style, make sure you can wear a solid, really supportive strapless bra. I've seen girls who were just too well endowed to pull this off. Plenty of other great looks out there if you're not able to wear this style with ease.
10) And lastly, make sure your shoes are in good shape- it's like they say in the work world that when you interview, people immediately notice a scuffed up pair of shoes even if the outfit is sharp!

Wishing all these girls a great rush - brings back so many wonderful memories of my own rush and then being an active rushing.

OldFLDDD · #38 07-31-2018, 10:38 AM

Thank you so much for the great tips and dress suggestions--she feels much better as her choices are very much in line with these. Great tips all around!

NYCMS · #39 07-31-2018, 04:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by OldFLDDD

Thank you so much for the great tips and dress suggestions--she feels much better as her choices are very much in line with these. Great tips all around!

OldFLDDD, please keep us posted on how things go!

bevogal · #40 08-05-2018, 08:31 AM

So glad I found this site-my daughter is going through rush this year and she is pretty calm about it; however, I am nervous!

DGTess · #41 08-05-2018, 02:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bevogal

So glad I found this site-my daughter is going through rush this year and she is pretty calm about it; however, I am nervous!

Is she also going to Texas?

bevogal · #42 08-05-2018, 06:47 PM

@DGTess- Yes, she will be attending UT.

DGTess · #43 08-06-2018, 04:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bevogal

@DGTess- Yes, she will be attending UT.

Best to her.

I have to admit to a sigh of relief when daughter chose not to rush at UT. She had a fantastic college career without being greek, and while I wish she had the sisterhood opportunities I did, I realized that my experience at a small northeast chapter with 15-20 actives was not the same, and she could not get that at Texas.

MotherRusher · #44 08-07-2018, 09:19 PM

I want in this! I’m ahead of you guys, and Fireball is my choice! My daughter is also going through recruitment, and hers started TODAY. UGA baby! Keep the drinks coming.

BGKdLady · #45 08-07-2018, 10:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DGTess

Best to her.

I have to admit to a sigh of relief when daughter chose not to rush at UT. She had a fantastic college career without being greek, and while I wish she had the sisterhood opportunities I did, I realized that my experience at a small northeast chapter with 15-20 actives was not the same, and she could not get that at Texas.

Same!! UT rush is brutal! I would have loved my daughter to experience Greek life, but it is so different here! Fortunately there are a million other things to engage in at UT!