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  #31  
Old 06-17-2015, 02:45 PM
AZTheta AZTheta is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by elizey7 View Post
Is it okay if I ask a question that might be stepping over the line, such as:

Interviewer: Why did you want to join ABC sorority?

Me: I see a lot of potential for leadership opportunities in philanthropy and other areas.

Interviewer: Give an example of the other areas where you see leadership opportunities

Me: Well, when I rushed last year, I met a lot of girls who mentioned that they were Christian or Catholic, and as a member of Intervarsity (A christian group on campus), I was hoping that, if I have enough support, I could start a Bible study with the girls. I also see this as a potential opportunity to create an even tighter bond within the sisterhood
Holy bump of eight year old thread.

Why would you want to intentionally and knowingly respond or ask any questions that are stepping over any lines? Gah! Please get some coaching on how to converse. Your anxiety is coming across over the computer screen and I don't want you to be this way in person. There is such a thing as overthinking. You cannot anticipate every question and have a pre-fab response.
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  #32  
Old 06-17-2015, 02:45 PM
carnation carnation is offline
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This is weird that they actually interview the PNMs.
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  #33  
Old 06-17-2015, 03:04 PM
DeltaBetaBaby DeltaBetaBaby is offline
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Ew, I would be SO turned off by a PNM who said she wanted to start a bible study. SO turned off.

Now, I know this is very regional, and even my collegiate chapter had some women who gathered in the house to do this, but the amount of presumption in this question would really make me uncomfortable.

I'm trying to decide if I am unnecessarily biased by the fact that I'm not a Christian, but I think I would be equally irritated with someone suggesting the chapter host a campaign event for a local politician or something.
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  #34  
Old 06-17-2015, 03:23 PM
33girl 33girl is offline
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One of the Bs you're supposed to avoid is Bible. BIG NO NO.

And yes, it would be equally annoying if the PNM wanted to start a scrapbooking hour or something within the chapter. You have NO idea if the chapter has tried something or not and if it's succeeded or not, and you have no idea what the chapter needs in general. Focus on conveying YOUR special talents, let the chapter decide if they're an asset.

Along these lines, I would probably be turned off by a pnm who talked incessantly about "leadership" - that would make me feel like she's just trying to pad her resume. That's my personal opinion, however.
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  #35  
Old 06-17-2015, 04:29 PM
Alpha O Alpha O is offline
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As a general rule, that the question of "Why do you want to join [insert organization]?" or "Why do you want to do [insert activity here]?" is best answered by a response that is unique to that organization or activity.

"I want to join a sorority so that I can participate in philanthropic activities and hold leadership positions," would therefore be not be the best answer. At any campus, there are plenty of organizations that would allow someone to hold leadership positions and/or participate in meaningful service. What sets being in a sorority apart from those other organizations to you? That's an unasked question that a good answer would allude to.

Don't try to answer it directly because that would be highly awkward. What would you think of someone who said something along the lines of, "Unlike Philanthropic Club X, being in a sorority would allow me to..."? It'd be very awkward. Don't do that.

Try and bring some finesse to your responses and to bring up unique aspects on both sides (unique aspects of the organization that appeal to you as well as things that stand out about you in a good way).

Quote:
Originally Posted by 33girl View Post
Along these lines, I would probably be turned off by a pnm who talked incessantly about "leadership" - that would make me feel like she's just trying to pad her resume. That's my personal opinion, however.
I agree with you. There's nothing wrong with talking about leadership or having a desire to hold leadership positions, but I don't think this should be the primary stated reason that someone wants to join an organization. And I also don't think it should be that prevalent in recruitment conversation. Leadership aspirations are something that I think are to be kept more personal until someone joins an organization and those opportunities present themselves. Entering an organization by saying, "I want to be a leader here" is just a bad way to go.

Quote:
Originally Posted by 33girl View Post
And yes, it would be equally annoying if the PNM wanted to start a scrapbooking hour or something within the chapter. You have NO idea if the chapter has tried something or not and if it's succeeded or not, and you have no idea what the chapter needs in general.
Yes. As a PNM, one is attempting to gain membership into the organization. One is not running for an executive board position at that point. It's presumptuous and rude to attempt to unveil plans of how one would try to improve an organization s/he is not even a member of.

That is basically saying, "I think your organization has faults and this is what you should do." Elizey7, would you like to hear that type of sentiment about an organization that is dear to your heart from a complete stranger? My guess is no. And then that stranger wants to join your organization to "fix" things as s/he sees fit? I'm sure that most people would not take kindly to this.

Quote:
Originally Posted by 33girl View Post
Focus on conveying YOUR special talents, let the chapter decide if they're an asset.
Yes. Your job is to sell yourself. Not your ideas about what improvements the sorority needs. Your future plans for this organization are not applicable in this case. Keep a focus on what you have actually done that makes you an asset to the organization. And if you haven't done enough, get started now. You have a whole two months to get involved in things you can talk about that show instead of tell.
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  #36  
Old 06-17-2015, 04:42 PM
carnation carnation is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Alpha O View Post
That is basically saying, "I think your organization has faults and this is what you should do." Elizey7, would you like to hear that type of sentiment about an organization that is dear to your heart from a complete stranger? My guess is no. And then that stranger wants to join your organization to "fix" things as s/he sees fit? I'm sure that most people would not take kindly to this.
I have actually heard several stories of PNMs telling weak-recruiting chapters that they would love to join their chapter and turn it around.
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  #37  
Old 06-17-2015, 05:17 PM
Alpha O Alpha O is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by carnation View Post
I have actually heard several stories of PNMs telling weak-recruiting chapters that they would love to join their chapter and turn it around.

People can be so tactless.
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  #38  
Old 06-18-2015, 12:59 AM
elizey7 elizey7 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Alpha O View Post
As a general rule, that the question of "Why do you want to join [insert organization]?" or "Why do you want to do [insert activity here]?" is best answered by a response that is unique to that organization or activity.

"I want to join a sorority so that I can participate in philanthropic activities and hold leadership positions," would therefore be not be the best answer. At any campus, there are plenty of organizations that would allow someone to hold leadership positions and/or participate in meaningful service. What sets being in a sorority apart from those other organizations to you? That's an unasked question that a good answer would allude to.

Don't try to answer it directly because that would be highly awkward. What would you think of someone who said something along the lines of, "Unlike Philanthropic Club X, being in a sorority would allow me to..."? It'd be very awkward. Don't do that.

Try and bring some finesse to your responses and to bring up unique aspects on both sides (unique aspects of the organization that appeal to you as well as things that stand out about you in a good way).


I agree with you. There's nothing wrong with talking about leadership or having a desire to hold leadership positions, but I don't think this should be the primary stated reason that someone wants to join an organization. And I also don't think it should be that prevalent in recruitment conversation. Leadership aspirations are something that I think are to be kept more personal until someone joins an organization and those opportunities present themselves. Entering an organization by saying, "I want to be a leader here" is just a bad way to go.


Yes. As a PNM, one is attempting to gain membership into the organization. One is not running for an executive board position at that point. It's presumptuous and rude to attempt to unveil plans of how one would try to improve an organization s/he is not even a member of.

That is basically saying, "I think your organization has faults and this is what you should do." Elizey7, would you like to hear that type of sentiment about an organization that is dear to your heart from a complete stranger? My guess is no. And then that stranger wants to join your organization to "fix" things as s/he sees fit? I'm sure that most people would not take kindly to this.


Yes. Your job is to sell yourself. Not your ideas about what improvements the sorority needs. Your future plans for this organization are not applicable in this case. Keep a focus on what you have actually done that makes you an asset to the organization. And if you haven't done enough, get started now. You have a whole two months to get involved in things you can talk about that show instead of tell.
So you are basically saying that all the websites about rushing that suggest a good reason for joining is leadership opportunities are a load of crap?
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  #39  
Old 06-18-2015, 07:36 AM
pinksequins pinksequins is offline
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Elizey7, per your other posts on GC, you are hoping to join one of two locals at CSU-Channel Islands and previously rushed and not received a bid. In the thread on expansions, you noted that you are fearful that during rush you will come across in person the way you do on the computer. You also posted a response to APhiAnna's conversation thread. The best summary of advice is to dial back the intensity and have a normal conversation. If you are already friends with women in the local sorority, the conversation should flow naturally. You also should take a closer look at the second local and not pin all of your hopes on the first sorority.

Last edited by pinksequins; 06-18-2015 at 03:26 PM.
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  #40  
Old 06-18-2015, 11:05 AM
DeltaBetaBaby DeltaBetaBaby is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by elizey7 View Post
So you are basically saying that all the websites about rushing that suggest a good reason for joining is leadership opportunities are a load of crap?
No, we're saying that the women in sororities are, first and foremost, looking for women they could be FRIENDS with. Sure, we all want awesome singers for our rush skits and awesome athletes for our intermural teams and awesome leaders for our executive boards, but really, the most important damn thing is that you fit well with the women in the chapter. That's not something you can force or fake, and even if you could, it wouldn't get you anything except a bid to a chapter where you aren't comfortable.
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  #41  
Old 06-18-2015, 02:49 PM
DubaiSis DubaiSis is offline
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Another way to phrase your desire for leadership might look like this:
I am really looking for opportunities for leadership. I was president of the debate team in high school and I really liked seeing the other members really thrive individually as our group succeeded. I think your sorority can offer me some great opportunities for that sort of bonding because you all seem so close and build on each other's successes so well.

You want to be a leader but you are in no way insinuating that you need to fix them.

But seriously, what sorority women are looking for is friends. All the other stuff is frosting.
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  #42  
Old 06-18-2015, 05:56 PM
Sciencewoman Sciencewoman is offline
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Originally Posted by DubaiSis View Post
But seriously, what sorority women are looking for is friends. All the other stuff is frosting.
Word.

When we were really deliberating, one of my chapter sisters used to say, "Ask yourself: do you want to brush your teeth next to this girl for the next 3 years?"
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  #43  
Old 07-01-2015, 08:43 PM
Alpha O Alpha O is offline
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Originally Posted by elizey7 View Post
So you are basically saying that all the websites about rushing that suggest a good reason for joining is leadership opportunities are a load of crap?
Nope.

Quote:
Originally Posted by DeltaBetaBaby View Post
No, we're saying that the women in sororities are, first and foremost, looking for women they could be FRIENDS with. Sure, we all want awesome singers for our rush skits and awesome athletes for our intermural teams and awesome leaders for our executive boards, but really, the most important damn thing is that you fit well with the women in the chapter. That's not something you can force or fake, and even if you could, it wouldn't get you anything except a bid to a chapter where you aren't comfortable.
This right here. DeltaBetaBaby is exactly on point. I wholeheartedly agree with her. I wish you the best of luck with your recruitment!
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  #44  
Old 07-02-2015, 11:53 AM
AZTheta AZTheta is offline
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Here's a thought:

I enjoyed friendships with other girls my entire life (starting with Brownies, going on to Job's Daughters, and other organizations as well) and wanted that to continue when I entered college. I knew that I would have that in a sorority. It was a safe haven for me from the large, impersonal University. Going to school with thousands of unknown people was intimidating - but was made much friendlier when I joined. I knew that at some point during the day I would run into another sister on campus and I would feel "at home" and "connected." I had seen what sorority women had (watching at Cal Berkeley, as well as watching the older sisters/friends I knew), and I wanted it.

I didn't think about philanthropy at the time, or leadership. I thought about friends. I thought about being part of a group, and belonging. AND yes I did think about parties - that was part of the equation. It wasn't until my senior year that I began to grasp the "lifetime membership" thing, and I saw how much I had been changed by my years of membership (including living in the house and rooming with a cross section of sisters, not always by their or my choice!). It was really about being friends, through all sorts of situations (some of which were pretty unpleasant). I liked what I saw, I wanted it, and I learned how to be an adult friend (corny, okay - but true, I had to learn!).

I'd want to know how they build and maintain friendships day-to-day. That's the bottom line for me.
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  #45  
Old 07-02-2015, 12:00 PM
Titchou Titchou is online now
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I concur, AZTheta. I went from a small Catholic girls' boarding school with 44 in my graduating class to the University of Alabama. I wanted and needed that connection and feeling of belonging that I had had in high school. Even though I was much closer to home at Bama than in St Louis and had an aunt and uncle in Tuscaloosa, I really needed that experience. And after 51 years of membership, I still have it!
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