Alabama Sorority Costs...Can anyone help?

[jll]

Some really good information here and I sincerely want to thank everyone for your help. I told my D to talk to her Rho Chi and see what she says.

Here is an example: Online Alphi Chi O lists their costs as $4200/$3500. That is first semester/second semester. DZ lists their costs as $2900/$2400. That is a big difference!

My D cannot work, due to her major, which I cannot mention here as it would probably make it easy to identify her. I am not looking at 'extras' like T's, zap's, etc. I am only looking at living out fee's that are listed by the sorority for first year members (if they list it).

yes living in the sorority will cut costs...but that is not until next year and maybe not ever since there are way more members than available rooms. So I am not considering that...only looking at first year fee's as listed online.

I found these costs by doing a search for the sorority, using alabama and then the word cost.

Why is there such a huge difference? I am telling my D to cut houses that she LOVES because we just cannot afford $8000 a year in fee's. UA website Greek Life says that the AVERAGE is 1/2 that. I have found that the amount that they call average is really the cost of the lowest house. No way to plan for this...We want to honor our commitment long term. My older D is in a house in the midwest and I know the advantages to greek life. Trust me you are all preaching to the choir. I WANT her to be in the house of her dreams, but $8000 is more than we are paying for tuition! I have to balance this with my other two kids who are in college too.

[bamaSDT]

to op I think your question is a perfectly valid one and i think a lot of other families probably need the same information. I hope the links under the chapter profiles on the ua panhellenic site are a help. Many of the brochures seem to have complete price break downs! Good luck to you and your daughter

[amanda6035]

Originally Posted by Titchou

Give up your lattes and pay the tab.

BRAVO!!!!

[DeltaBetaBaby]

Originally Posted by jll

Why is there such a huge difference?

Not specifically about Bama, but reasons dues differ among chapters on the same campus:

Some chapters include things that others don't. For example, formal. In my chapter, if you went to formal, you paid for formal. If you didn't, you didn't. Other chapters on my campus just included it in dues. There are pros and cons to each approach.

Some chapters have more expensive houses to maintain. Some expect the live-outs to contribute more heavily than others.

Some simply spend more during the year.

[AXOmom]

I get not wanting to nickel and dime your child to death, but it isn't going to kill them to nickel and dime it A LITTLE. The $600 to $800 in pins t-shirts and zaps (wth???) seems WAY high. I mean - these kids have digital cameras and i-phones, why do they need a professional pictures at every event? That seems like a huge waste, but if a parent has it to blow in this economy - good for them.

Jll - Speaking as a parent who doesn't have it to blow and is currently paying off some of our two children's college loans, I get that it isn't as simple as selling something or just figuring out a way to do it, and if you're like me, you gave up lattes and every other little extra you could think of just to get your child in school and help pay for it, but here are some suggestions:

a) If you/she are paying for any part of her schooling with loans and/or grants - those loans and grants will be paying for her housing one way or another, so whenever she lives in the house - they will be paying for that just as they would for a dorm (and the houses are almost always cheaper - don't even get me started on what a rip off dorm costs can be), so realize that while the first year seems like a lot of money - particularly when she is paying new member fees (which won't come up again), it will be much less if she continues.

b) She may not be able to work during the school year (although as was mentioned, my daughter has plenty of sisters with heavy schedules, internships, involvement, etc who still worked), but she can work in the summer to at least pay for the t-shirts, pins, trips, incidentals and maybe help out with some of the other fees.

c) If she can't pay it for it herself while she is in school - work out a plan for her to pay you back when she gets out. We told our daughter she would have to pay for everything sorority related that wasn't involved in her cost of living (which we would have been doing with or without the sorority). She couldn't pay it all during school, but now that she's starting her career and making money - $100 a month, every month until that amount is covered.

d) The incidentals (t-shirts, etc) are fun for them the first year and will probably run you more that year (I still think $600-800 is high and far more than we ever came close to spending, but we weren't at an SEC school). After a while, though, they start to take the attitude, "You've seen one t-shirt, you've seen them all." Mine wasn't buying many incidentals at all by junior year and none by senior (maybe one). She had t-shirts, memorbilia, pictures, you name it, coming out the ying-yang. Most of them are in boxes now.

What does she treasure most? The cards her sisters made for her, her 21-oner book, and the pictures they took on their phones and cameras that she posted on Facebook (none of which cost a dime). The pin is a one time thing and we spent nowhere close to $300 for it.

e) Clothes for recruitment were an expense - she paid for all of these with her summer work money.

I hope that gives you some ideas and helps. I know parents want to let their kids know up front what they can and can't afford. That's a good thing - but at the same time- you don't want to add more stress to an already stressful situation. You did agree to let her do this, so the only thing you can do now is help her figure out how to work it out. At the very least she will understand that you may, in fact, have to nickel and dime it a little, and she will understand she can't have every discretionary item available.

[adpiucf]

You can't base a sorority decision on the cost of membership. One, you don't have the numbers despite what appear to be valiant efforts. Two, sorority membership is like buying a pair of pants. You want the pair that fits all your needs (including price). Your daughter can't drop sororities unless her schedule allows it, as you may recall from your other daughter's recruitment.

Sit tight. It's a week of events. Let her see it through to the end and try to get the best information about dues as she can. I am sort of puzzled that the chapters don't do a basic run down during their house tours day or one of the days of recruitment. That is done at every school where I have ever assisted with recruitment. And I've helped out at schools around the country. The girls get some type of fact sheet or explanation. I think your daughter is not being clear with you or she is giving you the run around because you're pestering her to drop sororities based on supposed costs that may or may not be accurate costs. I call BS. Sorry to sound like a jerk, but I would wager your daughter is not telling you everything. The PNMs are informed of these costs-- most of them ignore the information and a few drop out after Bid Day when they realize they can't afford it.

The first semester of pledging will always be the most $$$ with one time new member fees and a badge purchase. There will be some type of immediate down payment expected before new member initiation. There are also payment plans that members can work toward.

I get that your daughter is in a difficult major, but this doesn't mean she can't work during the school year. That's an excuse. If she wants this badly enough, she can find a way to work a few hours a week. She can also find a job during the summers to help pay for the things she wants to do. I'm not really understanding why you don't let her be the young adult she is and figure this out on her own. If you can help a bit, awesome. If she later realizes she bit off more than she can chew, it is a great life lesson. You stated in an earlier post "We want to honor our commitment long term." There's no "our" here. Your daughter is an adult now. And she's afraid of getting cut for asking how much sorority dues are? If she will later have to drop out because she can't afford it, she is in the same boat either way. She doesn't need the blinged out badge or $1K in tshirts and "zaps" every semester. She can learn to budget.

It's great that you want to help your daughter, but this "our" talk sounds like typical helicopter parenting. If she later can't afford it or doesn't want to make it work, she won't stay in her hypothetical sorority. That's life.

[gee_ess]

Don't know about other houses at bama, but whatever you have seen for kkg will be pretty accurate. It is against our bylaws to fine our girls or assess.. The semester price posted is what is billed. Now, I cannot help you with incidentals - t shirts, gifts for little sisters, etc.

[Greek_or_Geek?]

Originally Posted by jll

I am telling my D to cut houses that she LOVES because we just cannot afford $8000 a year in fee's.

Like I said before, this strategy will not work. The PNM does not "cut" houses. The sororities cut PNMs!

[33girl]

If you can't afford the most expensive chapter, and really don't know how to budget to do so, then tell your daughter to quit now. Sororority rush is not like going to the mall. You can't see the cute dress at Nordstrom and then run down to H & M and get a lookalike for the fraction of the price.

[pam713]

I am probably opening up a huge can of worms here, but the mom of one of my rec girls has specifically said that her daughter could not pledge an "old row" sorority because of the cost difference. According to her "old row" costs twice as much as "new row." I don't know where she got her info but I do know that this mom really researched costs and talked to a lot of people before even allowing daughter to rush.

As far as which ones are "old row?" I have no idea, but I assume the ones that have been on campus longest. Also, would it make a difference if a chapter has a new house?

[33girl]

Originally Posted by pam713

As far as which ones are "old row?" I have no idea, but I assume the ones that have been on campus longest.

Not necessarily.

Originally Posted by pam713

Also, would it make a difference if a chapter has a new house?

Not necessarily.

[Titchou]

Moms (and dads) who do this are setting their children up for heartbreak and regret. Talk about a helicopter parent!

[33girl]

Originally Posted by Titchou

Moms (and dads) who do this are setting their children up for heartbreak and regret. Talk about a helicopter parent!

I think someone who wants their daughter to choose their lifelong friends based on costs would be more of a Yugo parent.

[IndianaSigKap]

Originally Posted by 33girl

If you can't afford the most expensive chapter, and really don't know how to budget to do so, then tell your daughter to quit now. Sororority rush is not like going to the mall. You can't see the cute dress at Nordstrom and then run down to H & M and get a lookalike for the fraction of the price.

Hands down best post of the day, maybe even week. I giggled

[Titchou]

Originally Posted by 33girl

I think someone who wants their daughter to choose their lifelong friends based on costs would be more of a Yugo parent.

Now that was a good wine I just spewed all over my laptop screen!