GreekChat.com Forums  

Go Back   GreekChat.com Forums > Recruitment > Sorority Recruitment

Sorority Recruitment Recruitment event and bid day ideas, membership retention, publicity, recruitment policies, etc.


Register Now for FREE!
Join GreekChat.com, The Fraternity & Sorority Greek Chat Network. To sign up for your FREE account INSTANTLY fill out the form below!

Username: Password: Confirm Password: E-Mail: Confirm E-Mail:
 
Image Verification
Please enter the six letters or digits that appear in the image opposite.

  I agree to forum rules 

» GC Stats
Members: 310,723
Threads: 115,113
Posts: 2,162,885
Welcome to our newest member, Prodigy1of404
Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old 09-24-2009, 09:16 PM
cstatebabe cstatebabe is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Posts: 1
Disappointing Recruitment

ETA: Just read some related posts so sorry if y'all don't want to respond. :-) Words of encouragement are always accepted though!

I just went through formal recruitment and came away with upsetting results.

I only listed one chapter on my pref card (out of two) and ended up not getting a bid. I'm not going to lie...I'm pretty bitter about the whole process. I feel like formal recruitment is so superficial and I don't get why I wasn't chosen. I feel like I'm the type of person who could fit into any of the "popular" houses because I'm nice and have the same interests as many of the other ladies (fashion, communications, cheerleading, and dance were big ones I had in common with the women I talked to).

I'm a sophomore at a moderately competitive school for Greek life (7 chapters). I'm tentatively planning on going through informal recruitment this winter.

Do you ladies have any advice for me? I've been uncharacteristically self-conscious about everything since recruitment.

Last edited by cstatebabe; 09-24-2009 at 09:19 PM.
Reply With Quote
  #2  
Old 09-24-2009, 09:39 PM
Titchou Titchou is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Sweet Home Alabama
Posts: 4,073
Quote:
Originally Posted by cstatebabe View Post
ETA: Just read some related posts so sorry if y'all don't want to respond. :-) Words of encouragement are always accepted though!

I just went through formal recruitment and came away with upsetting results.

I only listed one chapter on my pref card (out of two) and ended up not getting a bid. I'm not going to lie...I'm pretty bitter about the whole process. I feel like formal recruitment is so superficial and I don't get why I wasn't chosen. I feel like I'm the type of person who could fit into any of the "popular" houses because I'm nice and have the same interests as many of the other ladies (fashion, communications, cheerleading, and dance were big ones I had in common with the women I talked to).

I'm a sophomore at a moderately competitive school for Greek life (7 chapters). I'm tentatively planning on going through informal recruitment this winter.

Do you ladies have any advice for me? I've been uncharacteristically self-conscious about everything since recruitment.

Did you stop to think that maybe the second group aspires to be like you and wanted you to show them the way? Talk about shortchanging people....did you attend their pref and then not list them? Sorry if this sounds rash but how rude. You knew if they invited you that you would be on their bid list. So you went and then turned them down? Please....and if all you are interested in is fashion, communications, dance and cheerleading, then maybe they are better off without you. What happened to getting an education? Where is that on your list of aspirations????? Again, sorry but your post just makes my skin crawl...
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old 09-24-2009, 09:40 PM
ComradesTrue ComradesTrue is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 1,910
Quote:
Originally Posted by cstatebabe View Post
I feel like formal recruitment is so superficial and I don't get why I wasn't chosen.
You are upset that the chapters are superficial, but then you went on to say this:

Quote:
Originally Posted by cstatebabe View Post
I feel like I'm the type of person who could fit into any of the "popular" houses because I'm nice and have the same interests as many of the other ladies (fashion, communications, cheerleading, and dance were big ones I had in common with the women I talked to).
You were also being superficial.

Last edited by ComradesTrue; 09-24-2009 at 09:43 PM.
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old 09-24-2009, 09:46 PM
Senusret I Senusret I is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2001
Posts: 12,835
Quote:
Originally Posted by Titchou View Post
Did you stop to think that maybe the second group aspires to be like you and wanted you to show them the way?
Has anybody ever really thought this in the history of recruitment anywhere?
__________________
I am proud that my last post on this site was telling Kevin to suck my dick.
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old 09-24-2009, 09:50 PM
UGAalum94 UGAalum94 is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Atlanta area
Posts: 5,385
Quote:
Originally Posted by Senusret I View Post
Has anybody ever really thought this in the history of recruitment anywhere?
Maybe if she only got one invite and was trying to decide if she should take it, but I think it's unlikely when she's still hoping for a different group.

Even then, I think she'd think something more like, "well, I could make a difference in this chapter.
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old 09-24-2009, 11:30 PM
violetpretty violetpretty is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: A state with a North-South identity crisis
Posts: 3,213
I think the other posters have echoed my feelings about your attitude about where you fit, the chapter you dismissed, etc, but I can offer you some insight about the chapters and the process that might help explain a few misunderstandings.

Every chapter wants every PNM to want to join their chapter, regardless of whether the chapter wants a particular PNM. That way, they have their pick of members and they maintain a positive image on campus. Unfortunately, this can backfire and PNMs don't understand why they didn't get a bid when they thought things went so well, and become bitter.

Another thing to remember is that if a conversation went well, particularly in the later rounds of recruitment, the member probably DID like you. You were invited to pref, that means you were on the bid list (which means they would be happy to have you as a sister), just not high enough to match. You also may have heard about "quota" during recruitment---this means that each chapter can take a certain number of women so all chapters can be about the same size, so they can't take every PNM that they love. Also remember that membership selection isn't in the hands of only one member and some chapters are so good at connecting with every PNM that comes through the doors.

Your sophomore status MAY have affected you, but maybe not. A chapter that doesn't want to consider sophomores is more likely to release them earlier. However, there is a law of diminished returns with regards to recruitment. In very rare cases will a PNM have more choices during subsequent recruitments, and this happens when a PNM remedies what she did wrong the first time, whether it is raising her GPA, improving her conversational skills, or checking an attitude problem. It may very well be that your only chance to go Greek was with the chapter you turned down, and you may have already burned that bridge.
__________________
Sigma Kappa
~*~ Beta Zeta ~*~
MARYLAND
Reply With Quote
  #7  
Old 09-24-2009, 11:38 PM
Save Ferris Save Ferris is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Posts: 79
Quote:
Originally Posted by OTW View Post
Hun, don't be bitter if you didn't even bother giving the 2nd house a chance. But, that's the chance you took by only listing one.
Yep.

OP, unless you weren't told by your rho gamma/Panhellenic council that listing only one increases the chance to be placed nowhere, you made the choice and buried your own grave. It's not about popularity. There have been many women who haven't gotten their first choice and ended up happy in their second choice.

By you saying you have what it takes to be in a "popular" sorority makes me wonder if you showed that same attitude during recruitment.
Reply With Quote
  #8  
Old 09-24-2009, 11:45 PM
gee_ess gee_ess is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Posts: 1,551
Not every 18 year old pnm has the maturity or broadmindedness to think about the more panhellenic approach to recruitment. True, many do come to the conclusion that they can "make a difference" but not all.

There are so many factors that come into play in the way a pnm handles these experiences (the act of actually choosing to pref only one instead of two, accepting a bid to the second choice, etc) I often wonder what the Gamma Chi who advised her was saying during the process...many are not as helpful as they could be. When she called home, what was mom/dad/whomever saying to her? Many posters have even mentioned that a boyfriend played a role in their recruitment decisions.

The whole darn thing DOES feel superficial and we can all agree it is not perfect, so it is understandable that a pnm might make some very none PC blunders when explaining her situation.

I think she will read several of the threads on here (particularly the stories about women who chose a smaller/newer/second choice/whatever houses) and find that there is something to be learned from them. The stereotype that she started recruitment with will be replaced with the true panhellenic woman that is often represented on GC.

Start reading cstatebabe.

She may not have learned it from rush, but hopefully she will learn it on here.
Reply With Quote
  #9  
Old 09-24-2009, 11:51 PM
pinkyphimu pinkyphimu is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: Boston, MA
Posts: 1,795
Quote:
Originally Posted by Titchou View Post
You knew if they invited you that you would be on their bid list.
Most pnms wouldn't know this.

To the OP: you made a choice, some times we regret our choices. You are likely to be disappointed in the houses who may participate in winter recruitment.
__________________
Proud to be a Macon Magnolia
Reply With Quote
  #10  
Old 09-24-2009, 11:51 PM
violetpretty violetpretty is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: A state with a North-South identity crisis
Posts: 3,213
Quote:
Originally Posted by Save Ferris View Post
By you saying you have what it takes to be in a "popular" sorority makes me wonder if you showed that same attitude during recruitment.
And maybe she was assuming incorrectly that the popular chapters are only interested in fashion, comm, cheering, dance, etc. Lots of sorority women like those things, in all "tiers". And most likely, sorority women want something else to talk about with women who could be their sisters.
__________________
Sigma Kappa
~*~ Beta Zeta ~*~
MARYLAND
Reply With Quote
  #11  
Old 09-24-2009, 11:54 PM
qbt1990 qbt1990 is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2008
Posts: 162
OP, I feel for you-really. I'm sorry it didn't turn out well for you. If you go through informal do be aware of how you come off. Being right in the middle of recruitment practice, I've noticed a lot of really cool girls get nervous or shy during conversations and therefore come across as uninterested or rude which sucks. Not saying you were like that it's just something to think about. Good luck!
Reply With Quote
  #12  
Old 09-24-2009, 11:58 PM
dreamseeker dreamseeker is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Taking flight
Posts: 2,601
Send a message via AIM to dreamseeker
Quote:
Originally Posted by Blondie93 View Post
You are upset that the chapters are superficial, but then you went on to say this:



You were also being superficial.
my goodness you took the words right out of my head!

to the OP: give it another go, and this time really be open minded.
__________________
"where my knights at!? why aren't ya'll representin??" - KASS
Reply With Quote
  #13  
Old 09-25-2009, 07:56 AM
AnotherKD AnotherKD is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Columbus, Ohio
Posts: 852
Quote:
Originally Posted by Blondie93 View Post
You are upset that the chapters are superficial, but then you went on to say this:



You were also being superficial.

THIS.
__________________
"There is only one basic human right, the right to do as you damn well please. And with it comes the only basic human duty, the duty to take the consequences."
Reply With Quote
  #14  
Old 09-25-2009, 11:37 AM
LionTamer LionTamer is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: Philadelphia
Posts: 380
Sorry I can't join the chorus of disapproval for not going to both preference parties. The OP didn't say WHY she didn't go.

If it was because they weren't "popular" enough, then fine, disapprove away. But if the group was a bad fit, then maybe we can cut her some slack.

But I really only felt I fit well with one of the two sororities I preferenced (they were similar in "popularity"), so I only listed the one where I felt comfortable, although it may have meant that I may not have gotten a bid at all.

And I would second the person who points out that most rushees don't understand that if you're invited to preference, that you're somewhere on their bid list. The whole recruitment thing is VERY confusing. You're assimilating so much information about EVERYTHING those first few weeks of school, and even if someone mentions this (as one of thousands of other things you're trying to take in), it's unlikely that everyone really GETS it.
__________________
A∑A
Reply With Quote
  #15  
Old 09-25-2009, 11:54 AM
baci baci is offline
GreekChat Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 787
I have to agree a bit with you on this one^^

Recruitment is confusing on so many levels. You are young and have so much going on when you first arrive on campus in so many areas. You can only hope that each girl really listens and soaks up as much as they can to assist them in recruitment to make the best decisions. Overall, the system is good, but it is not perfect.

I know there are numerous cases where girls want only that "one" group and they won't take the #2 no matter what. Well, they suffer the consequences if they don't receive that invitation. Then, there really are those cases where deep down girls do realize the "other" group is not a good fit. I see no problem if they don't go to #2 in that case. If it is for the right reasons - I just think it is best.

I do not like to judge them or make statements about it all as I am not there every step of the way to see what is going on and I do not know the young lady personally. In the end, it is their recruitment and their choice - they have to live with the outcome.
Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
VeniceIsSinking's pre-recruitment through recruitment thread VeniceIsSinking Recruitment Stories 37 02-18-2008 12:20 AM
My Fun Recruitment Experience (I loved Formal Recruitment!) justabostongirl Recruitment Stories 32 01-03-2008 09:21 PM
Disappointing ADPiZXalum Chit Chat 7 11-10-2004 04:52 PM
Can I get a roll-call for NPC's using recruitment videos during formal recruitment? gogoaphi Recruitment 28 08-26-2004 04:12 PM



All times are GMT -4. The time now is 05:00 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2019, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.