Resigning

[PeppyGPhiB]

It sounds like the managers were just telling people that rather than looking elsewhere because they're unhappy, they would like for people to come to them with their concerns so they can be remedied (before people feel the need to resign). Too many people are non-confrontational to the point of being passive aggressive; most employers/managers would be very open to making changes within their organizations/teams if they knew people were unhappy...but if you don't tell them, they don't find out until it is too late.

Regarding something LAblondeGPhi said above, I disagree that people have an obligation to stay in a position or at an employer for any established period of time, with exception of teachers and positions like that. I would never make any type of agreement to stay someplace (in my profession) for a set period of time, and I would be immediately suspicious of any employer who suggested it to me. A good place to work would never have to worry about that type of thing.

[KDCat]

Originally Posted by lovespink88

The more I think about this, the more I wonder if I misinterpreted things. They couldn't POSSIBLY mean that I should tell my bosses that I'm interviewing at other companies...they must have meant to keep open communication and talk to them about concerns...right, right??!!!

LOL. I don't know. I wasn't there. It's not a bad idea to bring concerns to your bosses and give them a chance to address them before looking. Also, if you want to move up, it's not a bad idea to talk to them about that.

"Giving notice" and "resigning" are used interchangeably in my area.

[Senusret I]

So, I have a question.....

If I get a new job, do I have to tell my current job where I'll be working? What if I just plain don't want them to know my business. Is that rude if I don't tell them?

[DrPhil]

Originally Posted by Senusret I

So, I have a question.....

If I get a new job, do I have to tell my current job where I'll be working? What if I just plain don't want them to know my business. Is that rude if I don't tell them?

No. If the context of your employment does not warrant an announcement like this and you do not feel comfortable, do not do it.

Telling where you will be working happens in some professions because people are leaving "on good terms" and therefore they are sharing the good news with everyone. It also happens because the current job was used for references for the new job and we will see each other at professional events and so forth. People would have no choice but to know your business because they knew your business when you were "not so secretly" (people talk) applying for the new position.

[Senusret I]

Thankies.

Even though I am pretty sure I will be leaving on good terms, I do not consider these people good friends. I would rather not be findable to them, at least not at first.

[DrPhil]

I understand. They will still be able to find you because you will leave an invisible trail like those RAID ant commercials.

[DeltaBetaBaby]

Originally Posted by PeppyGPhiB

Regarding something LAblondeGPhi said above, I disagree that people have an obligation to stay in a position or at an employer for any established period of time, with exception of teachers and positions like that. I would never make any type of agreement to stay someplace (in my profession) for a set period of time, and I would be immediately suspicious of any employer who suggested it to me. A good place to work would never have to worry about that type of thing.

I don't think it's unreasonable to expect someone you hire to stay for at least a year or two. Jumping around more often than that can be a real problem on your resume. If ONE TIME a job is a bad fit and you leave a few months in, that's one thing, but it's certainly not a good habit to be staying at jobs less than 2-3 years.

[DubaiSis]

Originally Posted by DeltaBetaBaby

I don't think it's unreasonable to expect someone you hire to stay for at least a year or two. Jumping around more often than that can be a real problem on your resume. If ONE TIME a job is a bad fit and you leave a few months in, that's one thing, but it's certainly not a good habit to be staying at jobs less than 2-3 years.

It's not unreasonable to want that of a new hire, but there's not really anything, as an employer, you can do about it. As the new hire, it behooves you to stick it out for awhile, especially if you're right out of college.

But if I as a 46 year old woman with LOTS of work experience get into a job that I immediately realize is bad news quits, that's a different thing. But hopefully by this point in my life, I can see the telltale signs of a bad employer from the interview. I had one interview that just didn't seem right. I couldn't put my finger on it, but it seemed like she needed me to be desperate for the job. After the interview I mentioned the experience to another woman who happened to know the company and she confirmed my doubts. Apparently the boss was a complete, to the bizarre OCD extent, control freak, and would only hire someone who would HAVE to put up with her crap. Anyone with any dignity would be outta there.

One of the best questions to ask in an interview? What is your employee retention rate? Probably worded more judiciously than that, but if most of the employees have been there less than a year, that's a bad sign.

[AGDee]

Originally Posted by DeltaBetaBaby

Would you have stayed if they had matched it? I think that it's a very bad idea to stay once you've told them you were ready to leave.

We had a couple people at my last job end up staying after receiving another offer. One was NOT offered a match and stayed anyway, which is really bizarre. She was trying to negotiate a match and when she didn't, she still didn't take the new job. So weird. She has lost all bargaining power and respect, I think.

Originally Posted by lovespink88

The more I think about this, the more I wonder if I misinterpreted things. They couldn't POSSIBLY mean that I should tell my bosses that I'm interviewing at other companies...they must have meant to keep open communication and talk to them about concerns...right, right??!!!

I'm thinking that the person who resigned gave them all kinds of dirt about stuff that was going on or that upset her but she never talked to anybody about it before. So if she gave all these reasons for quitting but never tried to make it better by communicating concerns, then that could be upsetting to an employer, I would think.

There was a guy in our division (not my department) who left his laptop locked on his desk, put the key in the overhead bin, left for the day and just never came back. A few days later, he emailed his boss and said he was done. However, his boss was a freakin' maniac who regularly screamed at her staff in front of outside customers/vendors. After he left in that way, the other staff were each interviewed privately and the director found out how crazy their team lead was. Their team lead is no longer there. Nobody had spoken up about how she humiliated them in front of CUSTOMERS. You do need to speak up if things aren't right.

Originally Posted by Senusret I

So, I have a question.....

If I get a new job, do I have to tell my current job where I'll be working? What if I just plain don't want them to know my business. Is that rude if I don't tell them?

It is not required.

I've left quite a few jobs after finding a new job. The first one, the new boss didn't like me anyway and had selected a group of us to treat poorly to get us to quit so I felt no guilt, no sadness. I gave a month, which was requested at that job for salaried employees. Second job, similar... they were purposely making life miserable for a couple of us. Two of us got jobs at a different hospital, on the same unit, working together...lol. We gave our notice on the same day, left on the same day, and started our new jobs together. That felt good. Third job- harder to leave. It wasn't the people, it wasn't the job itself so much, but my dream job as an OT had come up and I couldn't pass it up. It was closer to home, adolescent day treatment.. perfect! That job was perfect until budget cuts came and they consolidated staff more and more and there were rumors that we were going to close. I started looking.. it was a self preservation thing. I realized that all of the adolescent programs within driving distance had closed and decided to get a Microsoft certification and turn my computer hobby into a career. My boss knew I was working on that certification and that I would eventually leave. I transferred within the same health system though and there was no animosity. That program closed a year after I left. Had I stayed, I'd have been bumped into a physical rehab job at entry level pay (because I had no physical rehab experience, even though I had 13 years career experience). I stayed at that IT job for 11 years.. my longest job to date. 17 years with that health system in total. It was extremely difficult to leave that job. I was in tears when I talked to my immediate boss. He was excited for me but sad that I was leaving. They knew I was in a dead end job and would need to leave to be able to advance. I had outgrown my job even though they tried really hard to continue to give me projects that would challenge me in my interest area. I'm in touch with all of them still and they are like a family to me. I love those people.

And now? I've been in this new job for almost a year. I was miserable at first. My boss sucked. The upper level bosses are two faced back stabbing cut throat types. Then my new boss came on board. He was great. He shielded us from the political crap and took it all on himself. He had our backs always. I have learned a ton from him since he started in September. But... they're putting him on a different project for the next 12-18 months and we'll be temporarily reporting to one of the upper level bosses who I don't trust at all. I'm very stressed about this. I have people trying to recruit me to other positions at this point. I have this very desirable certification. I'm not sure this particular job is a great fit. There are other related things I think I would enjoy more. It would be a great time to seek out other opportunities.. BUT... They have a rule that you have to reimburse them for any tuition reimbursement monies they've paid in the last 12 months if you leave. I maxed that out so right now, I'd owe them $10,500. That's $10,500 more than I can afford to pay them back. So I'm sitting tight, at least until next April, I think. Unless I find a new employer who is willing to pay that out for me.

I'm sad that my boss is being taken away from us. I think he'll end up being the Chief Information Security Officer. He's smart and he knows how to get things done. He's awesome and I'm bummed he won't be ours anymore When/if I resign from this position, I'm simply going to say that I decided that audit isn't my niche. They talked me into considering audit because they thought my skill set fit this position. It does fit, but I don't enjoy the work. I've seen some jobs lately that I think would be a great fit.. Lead Security Awareness Trainer.. which would be facilitating security awareness training, developing the materials, etc. I would LOVE that. I've considered doing that just as a consultant someday, traveling around to train people. I've considered developing an adolescent Internet safety course geared toward 6th/7th graders (or maybe even pre-teen courses) and facilitating those workshops as a traveling consultant at different schools. But.. there's that darn tuition reimbursement issue. So I will wait and I will trust that my perfect job will appear when I am ready for it.

Wow... I've been wanting to get that off my chest. I had no intention of writing a novel here...lol.