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  #1  
Old 10-25-2016, 11:15 PM
MinnieM MinnieM is offline
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Question Sophomore Transfer Athlete

I apologize if I am not doing this correctly. I am completely new here but need help. I need to give my daughter advice but when I went through recruitment it was at a DII school so it was not nearly as competitive as I'm seeing on these boards. And I did informal.

My DD is an athlete at a DI University (though not as large as your average SEC University) in her home state. She is considering transferring to another DI school in the state which is in the SEC conference and has a very competitive recruitment. As an athlete this year, she has spent 5-6 hours a day, six days a week at practice and misses class for competitions plus 6 a.m. workouts. She plays a two season sport that will have these time requirements in both fall and spring. This has made it difficult for her to join any outside clubs or pursue any other interests. Additionally, the coach forbids them from joining a sorority.

If she transfers, she will no longer be playing her sport and one of the reasons she is considering quitting her sport and transferring is because she feels this is keeping her grades from where they need to be. She has a 3.0 through midterm but is hoping to raise it this and next semester before transferring next summer.

As a sophomore going through recruitment, is there any consideration for the fact that she played a sport? Would they cut her a little slack on her grades or other involvement outside of the sport? In high school she played two varsity sports, club sports, had a 3.8 GPA and did various volunteer work and held a job. But, I'm wondering if any of that even counts once you are past freshman year? Do you mention any of that on your application?

She has a few friends in the houses where she would transfer to but not what I would consider a lot. I also think I can find her recs for most of the houses.

What advice do I give her? Stay where she is and rush at the original school (she's a legacy at a house there and knows a lot of the girls in it so has a very good chance, I think). Transfer to the new school at semester and try to meet as many girls as she can? Stay and get those grades up?

I am so afraid that she won't end up in a house at all or a house that she likes due to being a sophomore with less than expected grades. The girls she does know are in top houses so I am concerned about her expectations. She is very pretty and funny so I'm not so worried about looks/personality but the sophomore grades thing is keeping me up at night.

And now I have to apologize for the length. Any help/advice is appreciated. Thank you so much.
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  #2  
Old 10-25-2016, 11:30 PM
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thetalady thetalady is offline
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Originally Posted by MinnieM View Post
I apologize if I am not doing this correctly. I am completely new here but need help. I need to give my daughter advice but when I went through recruitment it was at a DII school so it was not nearly as competitive as I'm seeing on these boards. And I did informal.

My DD is an athlete at a DI University (though not as large as your average SEC University) in her home state. She is considering transferring to another DI school in the state which is in the SEC conference and has a very competitive recruitment. As an athlete this year, she has spent 5-6 hours a day, six days a week at practice and misses class for competitions plus 6 a.m. workouts. She plays a two season sport that will have these time requirements in both fall and spring. This has made it difficult for her to join any outside clubs or pursue any other interests. Additionally, the coach forbids them from joining a sorority.

If she transfers, she will no longer be playing her sport and one of the reasons she is considering quitting her sport and transferring is because she feels this is keeping her grades from where they need to be. She has a 3.0 through midterm but is hoping to raise it this and next semester before transferring next summer.

As a sophomore going through recruitment, is there any consideration for the fact that she played a sport? Would they cut her a little slack on her grades or other involvement outside of the sport? In high school she played two varsity sports, club sports, had a 3.8 GPA and did various volunteer work and held a job. But, I'm wondering if any of that even counts once you are past freshman year? Do you mention any of that on your application?

She has a few friends in the houses where she would transfer to but not what I would consider a lot. I also think I can find her recs for most of the houses.

What advice do I give her? Stay where she is and rush at the original school (she's a legacy at a house there and knows a lot of the girls in it so has a very good chance, I think). Transfer to the new school at semester and try to meet as many girls as she can? Stay and get those grades up?

I am so afraid that she won't end up in a house at all or a house that she likes due to being a sophomore with less than expected grades. The girls she does know are in top houses so I am concerned about her expectations. She is very pretty and funny so I'm not so worried about looks/personality but the sophomore grades thing is keeping me up at night.

And now I have to apologize for the length. Any help/advice is appreciated. Thank you so much.
First, your daughter needs to decide on where to go to school based on her EDUCATIONAL goals, not where she has the best chance of joining a sorority.

Second, your daughter sounds like she is very mature and has a good head on her shoulders. How about keeping your opinions to yourself and let HER make these decisions? It certainly sounds like she is capable of making her own choices. She is certainly able to get her OWN recommendations. If you need to make introductions to sorority alumnae that are your friends, that is fine. After the introduction, she should be the one talking to those alumnae and getting her own recs.

As a college sophomore, your little bird is ready to fly! Step back & let her amaze you with what she can do on her own!

Best of luck to you both...
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Old 10-26-2016, 07:49 PM
MinnieM MinnieM is offline
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Yes, I had planned to find friends who had been in these sororities and ask them if they would meet with her. I should have phrased that differently. And I am having a conversation with her over Thanksgiving to make sure that she would want to be at the other school even if she isn't in a sorority. Not a conversation I want to have over text or the phone so I'm waiting.

I came on here to see if I could get advice for her from those who had been through a recruitment at a more competitive school so I could help her see where she may be at a disadvantage. There are other threads that I've read that will help - keeping an open mind, etc. I just want her to be realistic. She is a first semester freshman right now and I don't know that she realizes how competitive it is.

I haven't really shared any opinions so not sure where that came from, just some questions.

Sorry to have bothered you all.

Last edited by MinnieM; 10-26-2016 at 08:17 PM.
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Old 10-26-2016, 09:30 PM
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Sciencewoman Sciencewoman is offline
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I think she has a few things to consider:

Does her current school have formal recruitment in the winter, or was it already held this fall when she was busy with her sport?

Was the sport the primary reason she chose her current school? And, now that she's not on the team, she wants to transfer for other good reasons? I agree that educational opportunities should be the primary consideration, but other things are important, too for a full college experience and quality of life.

If she joins a group at her current school, and then transfers, that may backfire. Some groups don't accept transfers as active affiliates, or they require a vote, so she could end up with alumnae status as a collegian and not be able to enjoy collegiate activities. People here seem to feel that competitive chapters/schools may be more likely to have a policy in which they don't accept transfer affiliates. Before she joins a group at her current school, that would be something to consider, and she can't really ask without alerting the group to the fact that she may not be around, so there's definitely a risk with joining now or waiting until she's a sophomore at the new school.

Membership selection is private, so no one who isn't a current chapter member will know how her past sports and grades will affect her recruitment. I would think that a varsity sport would receive some consideration as a substantial activity, but how each group or chapter views this will vary and it's impossible to know or predict. If she has the minimum GPA for a group and they love her, it might be fine. Other groups and chapters may be looking for higher GPAs.

I think recs will definitely be important.

I think she should decide if she wants to transfer or stay, and then make the decision to go through recruitment. If she decides to transfer, I think I'd wait to go through and join with the best preparation possible at the new school.

Good luck to your daughter!
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Old 10-26-2016, 10:44 PM
MinnieM MinnieM is offline
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Thank you, Sciencewoman. You make some very good points. She was not allowed to go through formal recruitment in the fall due to her sport. This was the biggest school that she was given an offer too. She thought she liked the school at the time she was recruited for her sport and may still stay but is exploring her options. I think her educational program at the other school is better overall but it won't hurt her too much to stay where she is if she prefers.

I completely agree on the transfer affiliation. Very risky based on what I've read on this forum. She can't accept any COBs (even if offered) due to her coach so next fall will probably be the first time she will have a chance to go through recruitment.

One last question. She has an acquaintance that she went to high school with who is the current VP of Membership at a sorority at the new school. Do you think my daughter could or should ask her out for lunch or dinner over break and ask her about general recruiting standards (at least as much as the VP can share) and what she can do to give herself the best chance? Is that too forward or awkward?

Thank you again for your thoughts.
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Old 10-26-2016, 11:23 PM
SigKapSweetie SigKapSweetie is offline
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Originally Posted by MinnieM View Post
Thank you, Sciencewoman. You make some very good points. She was not allowed to go through formal recruitment in the fall due to her sport. This was the biggest school that she was given an offer too. She thought she liked the school at the time she was recruited for her sport and may still stay but is exploring her options. I think her educational program at the other school is better overall but it won't hurt her too much to stay where she is if she prefers.

I completely agree on the transfer affiliation. Very risky based on what I've read on this forum. She can't accept any COBs (even if offered) due to her coach so next fall will probably be the first time she will have a chance to go through recruitment.

One last question. She has an acquaintance that she went to high school with who is the current VP of Membership at a sorority at the new school. Do you think my daughter could or should ask her out for lunch or dinner over break and ask her about general recruiting standards (at least as much as the VP can share) and what she can do to give herself the best chance? Is that too forward or awkward?

Thank you again for your thoughts.
I think hanging out with her friend over break and asking questions about recruitment and the campus is a very reasonable thing for her to do. I'd advise her to tell the friend she's considering transferring, that she understands sorority recruitment is very competitive at the new school, and that she would love to hear her friend's expert opinion. She may learn that she has more friends than she realizes in chapters at the new school!
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Old 10-26-2016, 11:38 PM
navane navane is offline
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Also, I would imagine that the recommendation letters would be a good place for the alumnae to mention your daughter's involvement in athletics and her GPA in relation to the arduous training schedule.
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  #8  
Old 10-26-2016, 11:53 PM
MinnieM MinnieM is offline
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This is really helpful, thank you all so much for taking the time to respond!
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Old 10-27-2016, 08:03 AM
FSUZeta FSUZeta is offline
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My daughter was acquainted with a young woman who was on the x country and track teams at her college (a small D-1). The coach forbade his athletes from join Greek orgs. Her sophomore year she quit the team and rushed. She had lots of friends in all the houses who knew what a great person she was and she had a successful rush. In her case, she might not have been as successful in rush had she transferred to another school where she was not known by as many people.
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Old 10-27-2016, 02:49 PM
MinnieM MinnieM is offline
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Zeta, I wondered about that also. If she knew for sure that she wanted to transfer it would likely be to her benefit to transfer at semester so she could get to know some girls.

Thank you very much, I am hoping to have as many viewpoints as possible so she can work through the pros and cons of making a move.
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Old 10-27-2016, 09:22 PM
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AZTheta AZTheta is offline
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You've gotten some great advice and suggestions. I have been thinking and here's how I'd tackle the "problem":

First, is she dropping the sport? If so, that becomes a "non-contributing" factor (unless her coach and former teammates are mean to her or something of the sort and she needs/has to transfer to get away from them).

Then, I would evaluate if the two schools are equivalent academically, as well as financially: to me that's an important factor to take into consideration. Always thinking about $$$$. And you're already looking at this (the academics piece) which is good.

Then I'd be thinking about distance from home (travel expenses). Because: $$$$

Then, what's the best fit for her major? Which you've addressed in one of your replies.

Then, I'd go into deciding about recruitment. You're already on it - securing alumnae for recs is huge and it's great that you can help her with this piece. It's a lot to expect a freshman athlete focused on her grades to also be seeking out recs in the middle of the semester, IMO. Sophomores do have successful recruitments at SEC schools. So do transfers. There are lots and lots of threads on GC about this topic. You'll see lots of negatives from the gloom and doomers, however, you'll also read from the successes and that's what I'd be zeroing in on - what did these PNMs do that made a difference and resulted in getting a bid?

Hope this is of some benefit. Please keep in touch, would like to know how this all shakes out.
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