Quote:
Originally Posted by AnchorAlumna
A great rec is where the alum knows the girl, has known the family forever and can tell you cute stories about her from Sunday’s church service.
A great rec is also where the alum doesn’t know the girl, maybe doesn’t know the family, but knows people who know them – through church, school, work, etc. A great rec verifies grades, verifies honors, tells you something about her personality, morals, background…good or bad! Say Sally PNM says she was Junior Miss for her county, and the alum says she was 2nd runner-up Junior Miss (which has happened once or twice). This says worlds about the PNM – aren’t you glad you found out before you pledged her?? Or the alum lets you know about major drama, the family filed for bankruptcy, a parent was found guilty of murder…doesn’t happen often, but it does happen. That stuff you aren’t going to find on a PNM’s application.
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But asking someone else what they have heard isn't really verification. And you could also be asking someone (even an alum) who doesn't like the PNM's mom, or whose daughter wasn't invited to the PNM's 16th birthday bash. Some moms (yes, even alums) can be a little less than objective where girls their daughter's age are concerned -- even a little vengeful.
It's hard to tell sometimes where the line between
vouching for ends and
meddling in begins.
Just food for thought -- when PNMs ask around similarly regarding the reputation of a chapter, they are thought to be soliciting tent talk.
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