Quote:
Originally Posted by IUMomof2
So I have a daughter going through IU rush for the first time as a sophomore. She has a 4.0, is involved on campus, and only got asked back to 9 chapters for second round. I know being a sophomore has its drawbacks, but I'm really, really surprised she didn't get asked back to more. She had a wide range of chapters she listed in her 16. I just feel horrible for her. She feels like there is a specific "look" that she doesn't have. Okay, I'm her mom, so I'm biased, but I think she's beautiful. She felt like the conversations went really well at the chapters she listed. She was really surprised by some of the ones that cut her. And now she's nervous for next weekend. She feels like if she gets attached to a chapter, they'll "just cut me" anyway. Ugh! I don't know how to even comfort her. And I can't really say don't worry, I'm sure you'll be asked back to XYZ next round, because, who knows! She could theoretically be cut from all of them. This is going to be such a long week of classes.
Thanks for letting me vent.
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Of course she is disappointed when she was hoping for a full schedule, and you disappointed for her because it is hard for us to see our kids hurting. But, as has been said, 9 is not a terrible number. There are many girls with fewer invites and she only needs one in the end. Just be supportive and offer her a place to safely vent.
Remind her to not worry about her "look". Some chapters may be interested in girls that are higher maintenance, but she wouldn't want to land there anyway. My 3 daughters, who all went through this process, are more natural beauties. None get spray tans, wear false eyelashes or heavy make up, etc. They wouldn't be happy in a chapter where there was pressure to be fully made up before heading to breakfast. If your daughter is the same, just remind her to be herself. If she is more into getting dolled up, she might not be comfortable in a house where she felt everyone was too casual. There is nothing wrong with that. She shouldn't have to change her look to be accepted.
If she is her authentic self, she will find a group of women with whom she shares similar values. Every house is not the right fit for every pnm.
With a 4.0, she is likely a smart young lady. She just needs to be patient and stay positive. Good luck!
