Okay, I thought I had been to some awful weddings, but these are priceless!
My contribution:
A few summers ago, my (now ex) boyfriend and I attended the wedding of one his childhood/hs/college friends. The ex was a groomsman and his mother was also invited since they had been friends for such a long time. The wedding was held at a beautiful old church and the reception was held at a historic home in downtown Portsmouth, NH, about a half-mile away. The ceremony was nice enough, nothing really to note.
BUT, after the ceremony, it was announced that since there wasn't any parking at the reception site, all guests were expected to walk in a procession behind the bride & groom, who would be travelling in a horse drawn carriage. Had it just been the ex and I, this wouldn't have been a problem, but his mother was recently recovering from foot surgery, so walking that far was totally out of the question. The compromise, I would drive her enormous SUV through the winding, cobblestone streets of the city, drop her off, then walk myself. My ex didn't feel he could skip the bizarre processional, since he was a part of the wedding party.
It was a bit of an adventure to get my ex's mother all dropped off--I drive a tiny car and nearly took off side view mirrors a few times, then walk the half mile alone in stilettos. I was slightly annoyed by the time I got to the wedding and only become moreso, when I got there and realized the only food being served was a sweaty wheel of brie and some wilted grapes (trust me, money was NO object for these two).
It doesn't often get over 90 in NH, but on this day it did, and not anticipating the hordes of thirsty and hungry guests, the reception site ran out of water and soda, leaving beer and sangria as the only beverage options. To recap: that's 90 degree heat, no food, no water, lots of booze. Amazing combination and my ex refused to be anyone other than the last guest to leave since he was a groomsman (did I mention he's my EX?) Needless to say, I was not in any condition to drive home that night, but totally not in a fun way. Instead, I, along with most of the other guests, was disgustingly dehydrated, sweaty, hungry, and sporting some nasty blisters from my 1/2 mile walk in stilettos.
And I never got a thank you note for my gift.
