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Old 09-06-2022, 03:03 PM
shadokat shadokat is offline
Join Date: Jan 2001
Location: Reading, PA
Posts: 3,819
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I gotta say, while I understand this mom feeling for her daughter because nobody wants to see their child disappointed, she needs to teach the life lesson from all of this. In the words of the Rolling Stones - you can't always get what you want. But if you try sometimes, you might find, you get what you need. Period, end of story.

My best friend's (and sorority sister's) daughter went through recruitment at Alabama and of course, she wanted to be in a top tier, old row house. Her mom, not really knowing how hard that is for an out of state girl with no connection, was just glad her daughter was rushing period. All of her life, her daughter saw her mom with her sorority sisters, and she told her she wanted to find that for herself. Every day after her rounds of parties, she'd talk to her mom briefly and say she was having a great time. She got cut hard after the second round, but every round she had a house left that she could see herself in - until preference. And when she called her mom crying, her mom said, listen girl, it's time to buck up buttercup. You still have a shot at joining a sorority here, and just because it wasn't the one YOU think is best, these women are looking at you as someone they can see as their sister. So put on your pretty party dress and get to preference, and when you sign your MRABA, you list both choices and let the chips fall where they may.

Needless to say, she got a bid, and it wasn't anywhere close to the "top house" at Alabama. As a matter of fact, some would say it's the bottom (Sigma Kappa), but it IS the right house for her. She is a junior now and she still loves her sorority so much and has taken on leadership positions and lived in the house. She wouldn't trade it for the world. AND, she found that group of women who will be her bridesmaids, best friends, etc. for life. Ultimately, that's what she wanted, and now she found it. She couldn't care less about tiers and bullshit.

I wish more young women and their moms could feel the same.
Be a leader; Be Yourself; Be DPhiE - Esse Quam Videri
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