[Stuffy1]

Thank you all for your advice. I agree with most of it. I actually am greek, a member of a large national sorority from a big greek school, but don't remember the in's and out's of recruitment from 30 years ago and my sorority doesn't have a chapter on this campus. And I do understand that 3 days is a short time but, in 3 days, my daughter has had 4 activities and 3 days of "group text chats" where most of the pledges participate. No one talks and 2 girls had been drinking at the latest freshman chapter activity on a Sunday afternoon. Additionally, since she has been on her small campus since August, she is very well aware of the reputation of the house and the girls. And, while we do understand the MRABA now, in looking at it on-line, I can understand how my daughter could have been confused about the COB option, or lack thereof, in the confusion/emotions after pref night and looking at the language through the lens of her advisor's (who is a great girl and has been so supportive) incorrect advice. I'm a lawyer and I look at language all day. An adult would have questioned it further, perhaps, but she thought that she had and it is not crystal clear. We have heard from reliable sources that there are several houses offering COBs but know no other details than that. I agree that there is no way to predict what could happen there given all of the circumstances and that it would be a risk in every way. She will talk to the faculty advisor today to share what happened and to discuss any possible options, none of which seem great right now. I am definitely encouraging her to keep an open mind and make a sincere effort. At the very least her conversation with the faculty adviser may highlight a weakness in the training program that could prevent another girl from going through this in the future. It is really awful that this has happened to her, she should have been able to make the best decision for her with correct and complete information. Also, I have seen the texts and her questions and the answers are very clear. It sounds like her best option is to keep trying until initiation and then just try to come up with a respectful reason to drop out if her feelings don't change. My biggest fear is that other chapters will hold it against her if she decides to go through recruitment next winter. She is very open-minded about sororities and would have been happy with any option but this one, it is not a case where she had her heart sent only on one or two houses.