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Originally Posted by jazing
I will just say this is still on going (spoke too soon earlier), but thanks for all your input.
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I'll agree with those who said that you don't have to be a friend to be a brother. I'll just throw out there -- as a parent of a kid with Asperger's -- that I don't think you'd be doing him any favors to give him a "charity bid." I fear you'd be setting him up for some major difficulty. People with Asperger's can certainly learn to navigate socially, and I suppose it could happen in a fraternity context, but I think it's more likely that it would be terribly stressful for everyone and wouldn't be the way for him to develop social skills. It could make things worse for him.
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As for secrets, I don't trust him. In order to give a bid, you need to have trust the person will not reveal anything.
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The ability to keep secrets is certainly a reasonable expectation for a brother. I just wouldn't assume that any inability to keep secrets has anything to do with Asperger's -- frankly, I've never encountered that as an "Asperger's trait." If anything, I think it more likely that someone with Asperger's -- who tend to want to follow rules and have everyone else follow rules -- would probably be fairly careful about keeping secrets. My kid is.
But, as others have said, Asperger's can be very different from person to person.
