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this happened 2 times while i was a collegiate. once when i was a phi and the other when i was active. when i was a phi, we just noticed that stacy was missing a lot on bid day! sisters were talking to her and trying to cheer her up, etc. one of the sisters who had also been in this position had a long chat with her and then she came back to the group. she definately didn't seem too thrilled, but by the end of the day, she was one of the gang! the following year, a legacy had put another group 1st, but was cut. she spent a part of the day crying, but both of her roommates went phi mu and she had several friends in the sorority already. she spent some time talking with 2 sisters (one of which had been crying the year before). in no time, she was the peppiest of the bunch and has been an absolutely wonderful sister. she is even a chapter advisor now!!
if a girl shows up on bid day and is crying, i think you need to give her a chance. let's face it, she really had hopes of being an xyz and was rejected. technically she was some where on the bid list, but she wasn't "high" enough to get in. the person is dealing with ending an emotionally charged week with a big "let down." it makes sense that she feels sad, but it is great that she is giving abc a chance! show her that sisterhood that you had been talking about all week. give her a big hug and welcome her to the family. this show of support may be all she needs to know that she found her home!
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