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Old 08-28-2019, 03:14 PM
sta3535 sta3535 is offline
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Join Date: Aug 2019
Posts: 7
Originally Posted by Rod D View Post
Any greek org that throws an "open" party these days is asking for problems. Risk control nightmare.

Both Greeks and non-greeks drink, so alcohol tolerance is the same.

If you're interested in rushing a house, it is completely uncool to go there and drink. When you're drunk, you become a risk. If you act like a jackass, you're done. You should treat it like a business event -- one drink only.
I understand that it's supposed to be more of a "formal event". However, partying is supposed to be fun, yet controlled IMO. I'm not here to cause any conflict, even though rush events differ from each fraternity/sorority. I also drink until I get tipsy/buzzed, but I never blacked out before & only once sick once.

Originally Posted by thetalady View Post
I am afraid that your approach here is pretty indicative of why you were not successful at getting a bid. Back off, buddy.
Even though it's important to have control over any party, if someone, like me, isn't doing anything wrong, then maybe I'm not the problem. However, drunken behaviors can range from harmless to harmful. Now, I'm more of a chilled out/relaxed drunk: I stay cool, calm, & collected after a couple of drinks. I also like to mingle/talk to others, but overreacting just because I decide to introduce myself to others, especially girls, is quite immature IMO, unless if a someone causes a major conflict at the party, rather than someone who just wants to enjoy the party scene, like me.

On an extra note, I didn't mean to sound rude with that statement, but due to my diagnosis, maybe I'm missing a non-verbal social cue here & there, which may affect my social interactions with others. And when I'm told after the fact, it's usually too late to go back & redeem myself. I even tried to apologize for acting out of line, but everytime I tried to fix a problem, no one wanted to talk it out like mature adults.

Originally Posted by AZTheta View Post
Well. Here's the crux ("vital, basic, decisive or pivotal point") of your situation. Having spent decades diagnosing and treating Autism Spectrum Disorders as part of a multi-disciplinary team, I'm nodding my head at that sentence, buried in all your questions and thoughts in your post. Everything you wrote makes sense to me based on that sentence.

Socially, navigating the Greek Life waters would be extremely challenging for anyone on the spectrum ("high functioning" or not, and BTW that term has fallen out of favor recently). So many neurotypical subtleties and cues that are intuitive to us, yet are almost impossible for neurodivergent people to process. I could videotape the interaction, sit with you, and point out the missteps. You possibly would see what I'm seeing. That's a starting point for treatment. But I digress.

So, as to the other parts of your post: you're showing curiosity about situations (i.e. asking questions to which the answers are apparent) that are intuitive to non-ASD people, which also illustrates the social challenges faced by those on the spectrum. My intent here is to be helpful and look at what you wrote through another lens. Your Greek *fraternity* friend gave you a great explanation! I'm glad that you've moved on. You likely dodged a bullet by not becoming a member of a fraternity (my opinion, folks!).
I respect your response & I wish that I had someone who would tell me what I'm doing wrong, even though I'm supposed to be the one who's supposed to figure it out. I also have little to no issues whenever I attend social events, so maybe it depends on the overall situation. Furthermore, I gradually entered the party scene during my freshman year without drinking until I felt comfortable enough to do so.

Edit: I'd also like to add that due to the size/location of my college, (which is smaller than 10,000 students), there's nothing much to do on the weekends, except for partying, staying in, or going home every weekend. However, I'm not the type of person who likes to stay in or go home. I'd rather meet new people & stay social, which brings me happiness.

Last edited by sta3535; 08-28-2019 at 05:28 PM.
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