I'm sorry, I don't think my point or purpose is getting across very well.
As I've said, my chapter would be happy to embrace everything about a new organization. My friends in a different local sorority just had their chapter absorbed, and the national absorbing them incorporated very small things into the chapter's process. The learning of their letters, for instance, as a small token of how the chapter got started. But everything about the chapter is now the NPC's.
That is fine with us. 
My own sorority was started by a sisterhood of a Fraternity, and while we are fully our own org now, we teach our New Members the letters of the sisterhood because it's where our founding sisters started out. It would be a bit different with colonizing a national, they have their own history. But I'm a bit confused about what the harm or resistance would be in teaching new members about the local's history if the girls that colonized the chapter were a part of that NPC first? Also, we DO NOT HAZE. Even still, we know that NPCs have their own process and we would embrace that one over our own. We want to be absorbed because we know that NPCs are better structured than we are, they have more resources and more opportunities for their members. We would rather become a part of something bigger than ourselves than see our chapter die completely with no one to remember it. No, a lot of the girls in the new chapter would not have my letters, but I know that in other orgs that have been absorbed they teach their new members the history of the chapter, not just the national.
ASTAlumna, yes it's different. It's not 100 years ago. But I was making the point that a small group of women isn't nothing. They can accomplish a great deal. I know that there aren't 100+ in EVERY chapter, the nationals on my campus were smaller than that for a while, but it's becoming the norm. That's about as many women who wear my letters period, but again, my point was just that we're small, but not nothin'.
I have no idea where this idea of "demands" came from either. Our alumnae don't want to make any "demands" on anyone, they would like, just as much as our actives, to be able to have a chapter on campus that they can come back to. To participate in something that is the continuation of their legacy, as the girls from their sorority would be a part of its colonization. They wouldn't be coming in, telling it how to run. They would be there to offer support since we all know the campus and how it runs. I'm sure there might be some of the NPC's alumnae in the area, but ours would be just as enthusiastic.
A priority is not the same as a demand. We're not planning on looking at any of these orgs and saying "IF YOU DON'T DO XYZ THEN WE'RE OUT!" Because, what purpose would that serve? The things I mentioned were things I KNOW have happened in other locals that have been absorbed and they are things that we would like to bring up at the table as things we'd like were a group to absorb us. If an organization doesn't want to absorb our alumnae, then no, we don't want to be a part of them and we will choose to not be absorbed by them. I doubt our saying that will make any difference on whether they would or not. I have heard that some organizations initiate all the alumnae of locals they absorb, I have heard that others are selective about it. There's really nothing wrong with that, it's their prerogative, obviously, but we want a new sisterhood into which we would be welcome completely. If no organizations are open to the (very few) things we want, then that's fine, it's not for us, and we will probably end up disbanding after this year.
FSUZeta, as I said earlier we have struggled for MANY years as a local on this campus, and locals that were always bigger than us have either died out or been absorbed. The way the wind is blowing on our campus is that if you're going to join a sorority, why not join the bigger names with much bigger chapters than the small local. It was a lot different when I went through recruitment in '05, but I understand that. Since I graduated we have been able to recruit a handful of girls every year, but it's becoming harder and harder, and my girls are really tired of fighting to survive every year.
I appreciate the advice and the time you all have spent on this thread. I know this process isn't all roses and there are some hard facts that need to be pointed out, but I came here looking for help and advice about what to expect given the fact that my chapter has already voted on, and initiated this process within our IGC. I'm sorry if any of you in NPCs feel like I'm not going about this the right way (it's a lot like recruitment, isn't it?) I know all of you are protective of your traditions and your orgs, just the way I am of mine. Obviously, I have some reservations, but on the whole we are fine with being absorbed and taking on new letters/history/etc. Really. We just want to be aware of what we can do to keep our history alive in whatever small way possible through this new chapter. If an org is going to come in and ignore our local completely, that really wouldn't be absorption, it would just be the expansion of a new org that has nothing to do with us. If that's what Panhel votes on, cool. But if they vote on absorption, I'd like to do right by my sisters and my sorority's legacy as best I can. I don't want to tell the chapter they have to do this or they have to do that, but I do want to make our wishes heard. That is my only goal.
I would still like some help from anyone who has been through it before themselves, if you're out there! Thank you all again.
