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"As the recruitment progresses I think they need to be honest with the women they want. I don't think there is any thing wrong with telling these women that they do want them and that they would be "perfect helping us rebuild our Chapter" because they have this quality and that quality. This will take a lot more work then normal, but it would be so worth it."
This. If the PNM are upset because they got cut, they feel like they are not worth keeping. Having a sister explain to them why your group wants them will make the PNM feel good and that will make her feel good about your group. She will perceive that you are clearly a group of kind, thoughtful, perceptive women if you can see the good qualities in her.
You also need to make them feel like the sisterhood you're offering is worth having. I think they need to see interaction between the sisters, in addition to forming a connection with the sisters.
During the pref ceremony at my KD chapter, the actives not only preffed the PNMs, they included a couple of sisters who had accepted bids through spring informal the year before in the little preference ceremony that they did. Those sisters had already initiated but they'd never been through a pref ceremony. The explanation from the sister who rushed me at pref was that they wanted those women to know that they were chosen, too. I was really impressed by their thoughtfulness for their newest sisters. I knew that they would treat me well. (Looking back, I now know that must have happened for those sisters multiple times because there were multiple pref parties. They got preffed a bunch of times, not just once. LOL.)
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