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Old 05-08-2019, 12:21 PM
littlegidding littlegidding is offline
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Join Date: May 2019
Posts: 6
Originally Posted by GreekOne View Post
If she is uncomfortable and attends fewer and fewer activities, as a result, she will feel even more isolated. However, if she finds even just one or two sisters who she likes and puts the effort into getting together with them, she will begin to feel more committed and want to attend more often. Encourage her to name a few that she has started to connect with and have her focus on building those relationships by asking to get together for dinner or lunch, etc. just one on one. It is a great place to start.

Unfortunately, women see pictures of chapter members and they appear to be super close. When they pledge they expect this feeling to overwhelm them from the first day. When that doesn't happen, they are disappointed. Remind her that things worth having take time and effort. It doesn't happen overnight. I told my daughters to think about a sports team that they were on. They didn't feel the same way about the women on the team the very first day of practice freshman year as they did during the last game of senior year. Recognizing that it doesn't miraculously happen without effort will take some pressure off of the expectations she is placing on herself.
She said that she was closer to her g-big (am I getting that term right?), but that her g-big is graduating. I asked her about other members, but she didn't really give me a straight answer.

I like the sports team analogy - I have been part of teams that have been close, but it took time and commitment to get there. I just don't know if my student is willing to put in the time and commitment, given the way she's feeling right now.
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