(Sorry for the long post!)
Hello everyone! I hope you all have had a great Labor Day weekend.
I was hoping to get some advice from everyone... This weekend was actually rush weekend at my school! I'm going to a school where Greek Life is kind of considered "average," and no one will really think of you any differently if you don't join; we have six sororities, each with houses on our greek row, and they're all super nice and very kind to one another. It's a great community.
Anyways, I never really thought I'd be the girl to rush; my dad was in a fraternity, but the rest of my family hasn't been too big on Greek life. My two sisters rushed and ended up in sororities but eventually dropped out after a few months due to personal life commitments elsewhere. Regardless, I decided to try and give it a go because I'm living off campus this year despite being a freshman (I applied late to housing) and I thought it would be a good way to meet some really inspiring woman.
And I can say without a doubt that this weekend, I really did! Leading up to rush, I actually got more and more excited about it despite having only decided to join recruitment about two weeks ago. And it was so incredibly fun meeting all the other PNMs before and during rush.
When I initially checked out all the different sororities, they were all so friendly. I had really good conversations at all of them minus one on the first day (but in that one I was put in a group of two talking to one member so we couldn't really chat one on one), but at one of them in particular- let's call them
ABC -I really felt like I connected with the girls. We were talking about finding self-confidence and self-love, and it was such a genuine conversation! However, the next day I didn't get called back to them.
I was really disappointed at first as I had started to feel really drawn towards that house (which I regret being so set so quickly now...), but I tried not to let it get in the way. I got called back to four houses the next day (at our uni we go from seeing 6 houses day 1, to 4 houses max day 2, and 2 houses max day 3), two of which had been on my top choices. Once again, all the girls I met were friendly at each house, but I didn't really feel like I clicked with any of them besides for one in particular, I'll call them
DEF. In the first ten minutes I spent in that house, when they were talking about their philanthropy and sisterhood, I felt like I had that sort of "moment" they talk about where you could really see yourself calling a certain sorority home. After that, talking with the girls there was such a blast and we were all laughing and hugging each other.
Sadly, when day 3 came, Pref day, I didn't get called back to
DEF. Once again, I felt pretty sad. Nonetheless, I went to the two houses I got called back to and gave them a try, trying to go with an open mind. At one of them, talking to the girls was nice and they all seemed very genuine and accepting, but I was having a hard time imagining myself there. I don't know why- I conversed well with the girls, but a lot of the times I almost felt like I was kind of the one leading on the conversation? I also talked to their President a couple of times who was very kind and remembered me throughout the process, but it just didn't really feel right (but part of me also feels so torn because how can you really get to know any house or person in this amount of time?).
At the other house, which I wasn't really expecting to get called back to, I had a hard time feeling comfortable with just being myself while talking to the girls... They're kind of one of the most "popular" sororities on campus. I just never really felt like I fit in there.
When the end of the day came, I was feeling pretty nervous/anxious. I had really started to look forward to joining a group of supportive, friendly girls- which all the houses were -but given I couldn't see myself in either of the two houses I had to choose between, I just didn't think it was right at the time... So, when it came to sign the MRBA (or the binding agreement to get a bid, whatever it's called), I chose to opt out of the recruitment process.
Part of the reason I did this is because there's also rush in the Spring. Not all the houses do it like they do in Fall, but those who didn't fill their quota do. However, if you were to sign the agreement, you'd have to wait until the next Fall recruitment to rush again.
I thought waiting now and trying out again in the Spring would be a good idea... but I still can't help but feel a bit sad and confused. I don't know if trying again in the Spring would be worth it if not all the houses are recruiting (even though I'd still love to get involved this year if I can), but I've also seen on here that rerushing your sophomore year lowers your chances of even so much as getting a bid! I mean, in the end I'd really just want to try and go back into the recruitment process with more of an open mind next time around and try not to really get so focused on any one house!
If anyone has any advice, please, please let me know! I was so looking forward to finding a "home" this year and becoming a part of the Greek community here on campus, but I just didn't want to force anything that didn't feel right in the end. I also feel like I kind of got caught up in the whole "trying to impress" side of rush, when I really just want to be able to find some genuine connections.
Anyways, I really appreciate any helpful feedback!
And, just so that this post isn't entirely on the downside, I did meet a lot of cool girls who were also rushing this year! I exchanged contact information with so many of them, so I don't have a doubt that some friends will come out of that.
