southern_theta : WAY TO GO! you did an awesome job. I'm going to direct all the HS seniors I know to your post; it really sums up the formal fall rush need-to-know.
Other things I'd like to add - THESE ARE GEARED MOSTLY TOWARD FORMAL FALL - I have no experience with delayed rush:
1) when you ask people to write recommendations ("recs") for you, only ask once! Don't be pushy - unless it's your scatter-brained aunt who lets you get away with it.
2) If you do not know a lot of Greek alumnae, look up the local Panhellenic alumnae org. in your area (cities will have one definitely, towns might have a regional one - if you can't find yours, call the PH office at the university you are attending, they will guide you). Often you can register with your area Panhellenic, and then alumnae that you don't even know will write letters on your behalf! Nobody says this, but recs are all-important at a lot of schools - so don't ignore them!
3) Re: your head shots: the goal of this is mainly recognition. The sorority wants to be able to identify you on sight when you come into their house. THAT'S IT! You want to look cute, classy and casual. This is not the time for your prom photos, or Glamour Shots with a lot of hair and makeup and a feather boa, or your cheerleading picture. Also, however you look in your head shots, don't make major changes before rush - i.e. dramatic hair cut or color. The sorority members then might not recognize you at first. Just wait till after Bid Day!
4) Prior to and during rush week: watch out for AGENTS! An agent is a term for someone who is unofficially representing a sorority but is not a member - such as the boyfriend of a member. You need to always be on your very best behavior, because you never know when the person in line behind you at the cafeteria might be listening to every word you say. Also, do not listen to the opinions of fraternity men on "which sororities are the best". They are not a part of the sisterhood and most of those "rankings" are based on shallow things like who their chapter mixes with, who they think the cutest girls are, etc.
5) My foolproof tip for making rush conversation at the first round of parties:
If you think you are tired of hearing those same five questions over and over (major, high school, what did you do last night, interests, etc.) - imagine how tired the active is of asking! An active will definitely positively remember a rushee who has an interesting story to tell, or asks HER a question instead of only following her lead. Pick a short interesting anecdote - maybe about your moving-in experience, or about your summer travels, anything that reflects on you positively - and use it at every house! (but only ONCE... you don't want to be remembered at the second round of parties as the girl who tells the same story over and over) You will feel confident if conversation lags, and the active will get a chance to learn something more about you.
6) Turn a worst-case scenario into a positive experience. If you are late for a party for some reason (usually discouraged by PH), apologize to your hostess (the active) and then let it go! If you get a run in your hose or a truck of fraternity boys with water balloons drives by and splats you (true story!), laugh it off and let it go! You will be remembered for your poise and grace under pressure.
7) NEVER BUT NEVER ever say anything negative about another sorority while at a party - even if it is at your very favorite chapter. You wouldn't (and shouldn't) be asked about your experiences at another house, but if you are, be neutrally positive but not effusive. It looks SOOOOOO bad.
8) This is well-known at Texas schools and can be a key strategy move:
If you are at the chapter house on pref night (the last party), then they are 99% prepared to offer you a bid... but they are trying to guess if you are going to pref them too! If the sorority thinks you are only halfway interested in them, they might put you lower on their bid list in favor of a girl who they KNOW is going to pref them first.
A sorority member can't (and shouldn't) ask you directly about your intentions on pref night. That's dirty rushing, and is influential. BUT... there is nothing to stop you from expressing your intentions to HER! At your favorite house on pref night, make sure you are at the TOP of their bid list by saying something like "I just love XYZ and feel really at home here" or "I really hope I will see you again on Bid Day."
Ask your Rho Chi or Panhellenic reps before rush what the restrictions are on rushee conversation, but ALMOST ALWAYS the rule is that the sororities themselves are restricted -- but the rushees can say anything they'd like.
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