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I get what you're saying. When my daughters rushed, I hoped majorly that they wouldn't fall in love with a really struggling chapter. As a former Greek advisor, I had seen so much pain in these chapters--they could hardly enjoy any sisterhood (well, or brotherhood) because they were always trying to COB. They had to put up with rude behavior from rushees at parties.
And I can still remember the looks on their faces as they waited for their small pledge classes to come to them. These girls were never running. Some girls didn't even bother showing up and of the ones who did, there was a huge drop rate. I remember one sorority from the seventies that pledged 8 when quota was 40 and I know that they didn't initiate 8.
So yeah--past experience of the mom, whatever it might have been, plays into it.
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