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Old 09-08-2018, 07:31 PM
phoenix16 phoenix16 is offline
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Join Date: Jul 2017
Location: Seattle, WA
Posts: 71
I understand. I'm not saying this to be cliche, I really do. I was a sophomore with a 3.94, was in 4 organizations with leadership positions in 2 (athletic, religious, honors, and professional), I had a STEM major, and at the time was pre-med. I knew how to hold a conversation and looked put together. I had fantastic conversations at a variety of chapters, but found myself with 6 chapters out of a possible 16 after round 1. What happened? (You can read my full story on here if you'd like. I did get a bid.-http://www.greekchat.com/gcforums/sh...ighlight=spicy)

After I went through recruitment as an active, I saw something that made my experience click. I would talk to PNMs and love them, but know they would be a better fit for another chapter. That isn't to say they couldn't fit in ours, but I thought they would be happier elsewhere. It gave me some perspective into what my conversations as a PNM were like. They were genuine conversations and they probably liked me, but saw me happier in a different chapter. And looking back, I ended up where I belonged. Did I go in wanting this chapter? No! But it worked out for the best after a lot of soul-searching and effort to get to know the women.

Sometimes cuts are for numbers and there were simply too many women that they loved and it had to be done. We will never know what went into that decision and we could run ourselves into the ground trying to think of what happened. It's not worth the pain.

Of course, I could have been dropped for superficial reasons. I could have been dropped because they thought I was too busy or too academic or whatever. If that were the case, though, I definitely would not want to be a part of their chapter and it is not anything to worry about now.

My advice would be to take a deep breath and focus on the chapters that DID invite you back. They wanted to get to know you better. They saw something in you that said "sister." Take the energy that you are putting into second guessing every word you said to the chapters who said no, and put it into the conversations with the chapters who said yes.
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