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It's competitive if you're the one getting cut. If the school uses RFM, then it's competitive. Period. We've discussed here quite a bit that competitive generally means that you will likely find A home (presuming you have all the required credentials for your campus) but you may not find THE home.
And it IS a mutual selection process if you go all the way through rush as the superstar rushee who doesn't get cut by any chapters. Then the rushee gets to participate in the deciding. It does happen, even at the mega schools, just not very often, like I'd bet it goes that way for a handful of girls per school per year. Out of 1000+. If a girl can do SOME deciding, then that's great, but she shouldn't expect (although they do every year!) to get her top list for every round without having to go to any ranked chapters through the process.
KUDOS to the Greek adviser AXOMom mentioned. More of that and less of unicorns pooping rainbows would be extremely helpful to a lot of girls.
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"Traveling - It leaves you speechless, then turns you into a storyteller. ~ Ibn Battuta
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