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I think the FB idea is smart and wish I had thought of it when my daughter was going through. I would not have a problem at all. You really aren't stalking anyone in particular just seeing if you have a mutual friend in that group. It also means that person knows you or at least someone else who knows you.
I do that all the time when I sell things on FB groups. I feel a lot better about the transaction if I see I have a mutual friend with the person.
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