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Old 10-07-2015, 12:45 PM
postplatter postplatter is offline
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Join Date: Oct 2015
Posts: 6
I'll try to answer in one post again.

I guess making the best of my college experience - I already lost 2 years being a junior now and much older than most and it sucks. I mentioned before but I want to make good friends, people I can count on and do things I like with. I'd like to do volunteer work, and get the networking that comes from being in a fraternity as well. Plus, hopefully by getting in the right house, I am pushed to better myself; developing better social skills, networking skills, higher grades, etc.

So if I could do that, it'd be worth it to me. However, I'm concerned about my looks pretty much ruining any chance at that. Especially since a lot of events would involve interacting with girls that just don't want to be around me/talk to me at all. But at the same time, guys don't want to be around a guy who is ugly and can't get girls.

Yeah, I'll admit some of it is confidence issues and a lot of really embarrassing issues (won't derail the thread with those) and I've looked into going to counseling. But my school only offers 1 free session and I think they refer me to someone who will cost $$ that I simply don't have. But honestly, like I said before, it'd ($) be better used on something like plastic surgery since my issues stem from my looks. But I appreciate the genuine advice!


My campus, at least I don't think, is not extremely superficial. It wasn't only a few girls- it's the majority and to be honest I don't think they're shallow its just how it works. I used to volunteer and think I might go and do it again but just need to find something I like. Yeah, I tried to put myself out there and go to a rush thing yesterday but it turned out terrible...(below)


Story time: It's long and pretty much made it this way to include enough details

So I was called by a rush chair at one of the houses to come by and tour. I looked up their facebook page and saw a lot of the events they put on. I managed to convince myself instead of getting depressed about how often they networked with sororities it was probably a good thing given they do a lot of philanthropy type events. (i could try and get my first hug too! lol).

Anyway, I decided to go. I met the person and he seemed nice enough. Showed me some of the house, seemed to get along with him, said hi and talked to a few other members. Turned out some guys were in my major which made me like the house a lot more bc I had some other connection with them. The only parts that I didn't like were the part about doing summer live in (pretty self explanatory), the fact that I didn't get along with everyone (but that's just bound to happen right?), and the rush chair/guys mentioned girls coming to parties and partying with sororities a few times, plus talked about how they did things like formals (only made me feel terrible because I knew they expected me to be able to bring girls, etc). Other than that it seemed like an ok place.

But then at the point of the tour in the living room, some girls were there and on my way to the kitchen I just overheard "you guys aren't seriously letting him join? look at him" followed by laughing/giggling
at that point i just told the rush chair i had a late lab, went home and fell back into a cycle of having girls rate my looks online which only made me feel worse.


Anyway, as pathetic as my experience sounds, I think it just shows what I was talking about earlier. And sorry to post this kind of stuff on the forum, I just really wanted to get advice about rushing with terrible looks and after the experience I think it solidifies what I was thinking.

Its just a bummer :/ but it is what it is.

Sorry about the wall of text. Again, also sorry about the pathetic posts - I'll try to stop posting about this kind of stuff.
Thanks for the advice and help so far.

Last edited by postplatter; 10-07-2015 at 01:45 PM.
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