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Old 08-05-2009, 04:09 PM
Katmandu Katmandu is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Cincinnati
Posts: 928
Agree with all above. Well said!

Can't emphasize this point enough:
If you do not receive your first choice, do NOT cry, pout, huff, mourn, languish, expire, sigh, sob, sniffle, glare, or otherwise louse up Bid Day for your new sisters.

If you receive your second or third or fifth choice on Bid Day and want to give it a chance, then step up to the plate and do it with style and grace. See it as an opportunity to show your character. You may be disappointed, even crushed, but the actives are thrilled to welcome the new members and most of the new members are thrilled to be there. No matter how much people might sympathize with your situation, if you create drama or stand aloof from the celebration, you will appear childish and rude. Besides, the girl next to you who is beaming and being gracious to all may be suffering the same pangs as you. She is just wise enough to keep it to herself.

Resist the temptation to tell your new sisters that they are not your first choice. This is information you don't want to share. Our experience teaches us that most people become reconciled, even pleased or thrilled with their situation over time. You may discover that your "second choice" is the best thing that happens to you in college.

But people have long memories, and long after you have moved on emotionally and are proudly running for Secretary or Recruitment Chair or Queen of the May, your sisters may well remember you as the one who REALLY wanted to be a Gamma Gamma Poo and spent the first three weeks of New Member Ed in a snit--and vote accordingly. (Have seen several elections lost this way)

The truth is, you spend 3 or 4 years as an active and maybe 40-50 years or more as an alum. All of the sororities have excellent values, core beliefs, philanthropies, leadership training and social activities. They all have active alumni organizations with more opportunities than you can take advantage of. They all have nice jewelry. They all have pretty colors, crests and mottos. They all have a proud history. They all have famous or not so famous members. They all have chapters that are the hottest of the hot on campus and chapters that are about to fold. Once you are out of school, none of the tiers, social status or other nonsense matters one iota. (or beta, for that matter)

Also, know that if you accept a bid card that is not your first choice, you are in very good company. Most women do not have a perfect rush. Many women do not join the sorority they dreamed of prior to recruitment, but most of them find a beloved home despite that.
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