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Old 08-15-2005, 08:59 PM
sugar and spice sugar and spice is offline
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Join Date: Jul 2002
Posts: 4,568
People on this board like to make a big deal out of grades and activities, but the truth is that personality is ten times more important than grades or activities at most schools. (Not to say that grades and activities aren't important, but at many schools these days, admissions standards are strict enough that every girl who was enrolled in the college would have had the required 3.0 high school GPA and variety of extracurriculars and service. I know this is true where I rushed, and my school wasn't exactly Harvard.)

This isn't to say that your daughter has a bad personality. It's just that sorority rush, especially at large schools, tends to favor those with dynamic, memorable personalities. Your daughter may be very sweet, but if she's shy, it's easy for her to get lost in the current. Sorority rush at big schools can be very rough for girls who are shy, which is awful because every house can always do with a few more sweet, behind-the-scenes type girls. (If you get too many alpha personalities in one chapter, hello drama!)

As stated above, tell her to forget the chapters that cut her for now and focus on the ones that wanted her back. It doesn't matter how many chapters asked you back; there will be girls who got asked back to all 15 houses who will drop out of rush or be cut heavily later on, and there will be girls who got cut by quite a few houses in the beginning but will end up in a house they love. It may be useful for her to practice conversations a little in her head before the next round -- did she travel anywhere exciting this summer? Did she do anything unique in high school? Even just practicing silly little anecdotes you can fall back on or fun questions to ask the rusher when conversation gets slow can help you be more memorable. Also, this sounds like common sense, but it isn't always that obvious -- if you really like a house or have a good time at a party, tell the girl who's rushing you! I avoided doing this because I didn't want to sound too desperate or like I was sucking up, but as a rusher I LOVED it when girls were enthusiastic about things. When it comes down to choosing between two girls who are in all other aspects even, the sorority will probably pick the girl let them know that she wanted to be a member, right?

I think it's just important to stress that cuts don't necessarily reflect on who she is, and there are plenty of amazing women who get lost in the shuffle at every school every year.

Would you mind mentioning what school she's at, or did you want to keep that a secret for now? I'm just mentioning that because many of the schools where rush is going on right now are large Southern schools with competitive recruitments where recommendations are necessary -- that could be a factor.
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