Uh oh, who are we SMUSHing? *starts making popcorn*

So excited! The Chessman is coming with me for my interview in LA! :D I was going to just go down and back in the same day but we decided to make a weekend of it. Already looking up things to do and sifting through music for the roadtrip. :)

Fun! Fiance & I are doing the same thing for his interview in New Orleans. I can't wait!!

Redid the OKCupid profile and started messaging some people. We'll see how this goes.

Valentine's day date tomorrow! I'm excited. My outfit is planned, with help from the besties, and I can't wait to just spend an evening out- just us.

We broke up. Why in the world are you still trying to arrange hook ups, and what makes you think I would do that? Ugh. You don't get the goodies for free, end of story.

Eek bummer.

Yeah. It's pretty irritating. Because I'd like to be all mature and friendly (we're the same major and have the same friends...we WILL see each other fairly frequently) but I'm starting to get really annoyed with this assumption I'm a booty call just because we dated for a long time, and it's limiting my ability to be friendly.

sounds like he needs a fuck buddy, not a girlfriend.

I added my ex on LinkedIn today, and earlier this week I posted a comment on one of his facebook statuses about a show he's been in.

We used to talk on the phone but I don't think his current gf appreciates that, and I can respect that (it must be hard to be faced constantly with the ex who is clearly a better person than you in every respect).

[QUOTE=agzg;2032363 (it must be hard to be faced constantly with the ex who is clearly a better person than you in every respect).[/QUOTE]

LMAO

Is this the Army guy?
I second that. :p

I intended to not talk to him while he's on vacation because I wanted him to have his time "away" without being constantly reminded of what's going on here. And I think we ended up talking more in the past week than when we're on the same coast. :p

Thank you, God, for such a wonderful man, a man who I can love AND respect and who will love and respect me in return. It's taken a lot to get us this far and I am looking forward to all the steps in front of us. He's happy he found me. I'm grateful he did. :)

Hey, guy I've talked to online for two nights in a row, you're cute and I'm enjoying this conversation. Also you're a geek and hilarious and actually mentally grown up. You just keep racking up the points. Please don't ruin it by saying something really stupid.

-Drole

Same here. I'm friends with at least one ex...and I explained I'd be fine with us being friends. EVENTUALLY. And that will never include hook ups. I'm hoping to avoid a "talk" so I'm definitely hoping he'll drop it so I can remain friendly and not have to get all bitch-ninja on him.

Never had an Army guy:confused:

It takes a long time for me to be ready to be friends with an ex. One of my exes I'm friends with (it's been 5 years since we broke up) another I'm just cordial with. The last one doesn't even deserve cordial.

You haven't lived until you sincerely hope that anything has happened to keep your ex from procreating - including prison!

:confused: I guess I've got my usernames crossed.

The Chessman is officially back from Florida. :D All day, I've been humming "My Boyfriend's Back." Just now, I was looking for a YouTube link to post....and now that I'm listening to it, I'm JUST NOW realizing what this song is about. :eek: Totally doesn't apply!

Let's just say "my boyfriend's back" and leave it there. :)

Oh man, I know I'll never hit rock bottom in the search for a partner because there will always be Wedding Freak Friend to cushion my fall. Her shit is bananas. I need a camera around her at all times.

Munchkin likes a boy!

So my twatter and FB friends already saw me post about this, buuut I had a complete break down last night. I found out a couple friends of mine got engaged and all of a sudden my singleness smacked me in the face.

I'm sooo over it. I just want someone. I'm tired of people telling me "he'll come when you least expect it" yada yada yada. Screw that, I want it NOW!!! I don't think that is too much to ask, I've been patient enough :(

Yep, the "least expect it" thing translates to "when you're not trying too hard"

I completely second the motion to "RELAX." When the timing is right, it'll happen whether you're looking or not. Admitting that you're lonely is okay, but you're driving yourself bonkers! Violet's right, there is a way to be "looking" AND not trying too hard. You're probably not presenting yourself as your best "you" when you're having breakdowns about other people's engagements. And besides, you deserve to be your best you for YOU, screw attracting anyone else! I know you're asking for it but are you sure you're ready to have it?

The Talker and I are supposed to see each other tomorrow night. He has to work during the day so I told him I have a variety of wines, some firewood and the CATS DVD from NetFlix (he's never seen CATS and would like to so I put in my queue a while ago) for a mellow night in. Besides, it's supposed to snow, yet again.

I don't necessarily agree with the tone, but this post is right. And being in that mindset WILL make it easier for you to settle, and that's no good. So snap out of it. As my momma said, you don't NEED a man to make you a complete person. (Or vice versa for men). I've been a serial dater...one boyfriend after another (three months in between about) literally for years and I'm telling you, I'm going to ENJOY being single this time dammit. It's nice to have only one schedule to worry about, always getting to sleep in my own bed without dog hair or stink, and basically doing whatever I want. Being selfish for a while is good for you IMO. Look at the bright sides of being single, because trust me there are plenty.

And otherwise just have fun. If you keep getting all sad because Suzy is engaged and you aren't you'll scare off any potential fun dates. And you'll take whatever shows up first, and that is no good. Remember once the party and attention fades after getting married the rest of your life is a long time to share with one person. There's no point in wanting to rush that...it's worth waiting for.

Seriously?

Are you sure you don't work at a law firm in NYC? Because you're sounding just like my Wedding Freak Friend.

CALM DOWN. Get your own life, but be aware of your needs/wants in a relationship. That way you'll be able to pick someone who is right for you--not someone who's around at the right time.

Hey epchick, I get what you're saying, and I get the impatience. I'm sure all the "calm down's" in the world aren't helping at all. If you're feeling like you're lonely and being single sucks then yeah, being single is gonna feel sucky and lonely.

I have all sorts of advice, or suggestions, but you know, I don't know you well enough to guess at what would help you the most. So mostly, I'm just wanting you to know that I've been there, and it does suck.

Thanks, I appreciate your post.

Yeah they aren't helping since everyone is assuming that I take on this attitude out in public or that I'm desperately seeking attention from guys...I'm not. I could go into the shpleel about what ACTUALLY happened and why I was down about it, but frankly I didn't feel like sharing. The friend's engagement was just a small part of it.

But apparently I can't feel this way without being labeled "desperate." trust me, I'm far from it. Yes I do get in these moods...I'm a fucking woman, and whoever says they never feel like that is a fucking liar. So exsqueeze me if I felt like throwing myself a little pity party once in a blue moon. I'll obviously remember to not put it up on here again. But thanks

SING IT, SISTER! I am woman hear me roar...

I just put that there in case there was someone who decided to say "well not me...I've never."

I appreciate your post to me (as well as your FB posts). They helped knock some sense into me when I had my brief moment of insanity.

Yeah no one's saying they never feel that way (I don't think it's possible to NEVER have felt that way), but the point was the more you worry about it the more it shows...consciously or not. The happier you are the more attractive you are to others (which of course is not at all limited to attracting a potential date).


My D&R random is that ex wants to hang out this weekend. I decided it would be during the daytime and outside on campus, which he assumed meant I didn't trust him to not try to get me to hook up with him, which was of course correct. He got all insulted (nice try, I have every reason to be suspicious) but agreed to it. So I'm hoping that means we can be friendly in the future. I've explained we can't be BFF until I'm totally over it, but I was starting to worry he would push it to the point that class/parties with our friends would be weird, but I'm crossing my fingers that he's now gotten the point and everything will be smooth sailin'.

Woohoo! That sounds fantastic! :)
I second that. There's nothing wrong with letting it out but Ep, you sound so....unhappy. Pity parties are great at times but it just didn't sound like the pity party was helping and I hate to see you that sad (even if you have right to be, my first instinct was to try to be all encouraging or whatever). And I can ONLY say that because I have been there. I even bought several t-shirts over the many many years.

In other news: *sigh* What has this man done to me?? I was NOT a feelings person and now I'm becoming one and it's pissing me off.

We all need a pity party now and then. That's why God made Ben & Jerry's, right? And, just because we feel that way one day and vent it, doesn't mean we're living that way either. For me, it's usually related to hormones :)

I think most people were trying to pump you up, even if you didn't take it that way. We love ya and we know that some guy is going to come along and love ya too, before you know it.

So, fun-to-talk-to online guy is out of town this weekend, and I'm sure is OUT tonight and not in on his computer... and that means he's not available to talk to... stupid guy.

You are totally right, I was unhappy that day....VERY. It even shocked me how unhappy I was, but I'm slowly getting better. The pity party wasn't helping, at all...and that is what I realized--like KSU said, it isn't going to make me any less single.

You would have hated to see me that night then! Lol but thanks girl, I appreciate it :)

No I didn't, but if that was really people's intent then I'm sorry for my rant. I really value y'alls opinion.


Ugh I just gotta get out of this house and do something.

^^^:) ;)

Okay, I have a rant of my own so please do excuse me.

I was never one of "those" girls. I pretty much despised them, in fact. You know that kind. The girls who swooned over their boyfriends like it was 1950 and they were sooo dreeeaamy. :rolleyes: The girls who talk in babytalk when referring to their men and call them all sorts of embarassing nicknames. The girls who suddenly use the word "baby" in a conversation more times than Britney Spears in a song. Those girls disgusted me and I wanted nothing more than to tell them to get a life.

Now I think I was just jealous of them because no one had ever loved me yet.

I can't stand who I've become. I catch myself using baby voices when referring to him and I got excited when he got back from Florida because "my boo bear's home." :eek: I can't believe some of the things that come out of my mouth and it makes me SICK. I was never the girl to get attached, never one to be super emotional. But I cried when we fought and I miss him when he's away and I'm giddy when I'm with him and touched when he sacrifices for me and disappointed if our plans fall through. I was fine being emotionless then he came along and decided to love me and ruined that perfectly good wall I had up. For the first time, I'm flooded with all these emotions I've never let myself feel before and it's tweeking me out! :mad:

I told him all this today because I had to finally admit why I'm so annoyed and that it's with myself and not him. He cracked up :rolleyes: then agreed to work with me because I'm CLEARLY new at this.

GF came back from her London trip a day early and spent the night with her. Exactly what I needed.

Date #1 (2?) with The Talker. He called about 10 minutes after he was supposed to BE here and said he was just leaving. He showed up with a bottle of wine and a single red rose with greens and baby's breath. He was clearly nervous.. more nervous than I was. I had a few pizza fliers out so phone numbers would be handy. He inspected each one VERY carefully. He is really very analytical but he thinks out loud. This is why he is The Talker. He talks through every thought he's having. It's kind of ... different. So, I was showing him the view in my backyard from the bay window in the family room, because it's really pretty and what sold me on the house. He said "wait" and turned me toward him and kissed me. He said "I had to get that over with or I'd be trying to figure out all night when to do that".

We watched TV, drank wine and ate pizza and snuggled. He's very nice. The thinking out loud all the time is different. It's very hard to explain. There were times that we were talking about something and then he would start talking and I would ask "What?" because it didn't make sense in the conversation we'd been having. Then he would continue his out loud thinking and I'd figure out that he had changed topics in his head already. Because he thinks out loud, he almost debates with himself sometimes. I really cannot explain this at all... it's like a "you have to be there" thing.

I think he's more into me than I am into him. He's definitely into me.

No fair, I've been stalking this thread to see if you posted and the thing didn't notify me of a new post. Thanks for telling me! :p

Wow, Dee! He seems so sweet....almost sugary sweet if that makes sense. The talking out loud is weird, not because he does it because plenty of people do, but that he kept talking out loud after you said, "What?" That's a little odd. I read something (in several different sources) about how men can feel attraction immediately but it takes women awhile to warm up the attraction. I guess that's true....that's how it happened for me this time. Though I really thought maybe I'm just not into him. Glad it finally kicked in. :p

The Chessman just left. He could tell something was bothering me today so, instead of dropping me off like he was supposed to, he came up with me and had me lay in his lap while he played with my hair until I could talk about it. :o The man is the LEAST pushy man I know until something's bothering me. Then he's very pushy at just the right time in exactly the right way.

He is very sweet. There is something in me that just shuts off with him and I can't really put my finger on it. Like our first meeting, when I knew he was going to try to kiss me and I turned and walked away. I hit a point like that tonight too. I stopped things and said "I need for this to move slowly" and he was very respectful of that. I just had this weird "Stop now!" feeling going on inside and I felt myself withdraw from him. I'm not sure what's that about.

This might be a case of "I want to like him" but I'm not sure I do.