Worst Wedding You've Ever Attended
Let's see . . . my sorority sister with whom I lived for one hellish year (she was part of a package deal - I loved Stacy, so I ended up with her and Alice). First, the invitation - a lovely Victorian era print on the front - but the text - ??? We were asked to come and watch as they celebrated their love. I called Stacy - was this an invitation? We weren't going to go - but then we were asked to be in the house party. Being properly brought up southern girls, we knew we were stuck.
SO - it's August, in San Marcos Texas. I am 6 months pregnant and already pretty darn big. The wedding is outside in a park, near the train tracks and across from the police station. The wedding is delayed because the mother of the bride has disappeared. I am sweltering in a navy blue dress and hat. The groom's side of the affair is interesting - all in jeans, cowboy shirts, trucker hats - and the bride's is in suits, ties, and dresses. Yep, she's marrying Billy Joe Bubba Redneck (and let me say - I have a Bubba in my family, and one or two rednecks, but even they know how to dress for a wedding.) Finally the mom shows up. The wedding can begin! Alice was a dance major. So here come 4 girls in white unitards, and begin to do a modern dance interpretation of marriage. The groom's side looks decidely uncomfortable. Finally the wedding proper can begin. Alice comes down the aisle, and they begin their vows. OH WAIT - because the mom was late, the ceremony is now late . . .and here comes the train! The minister continues to try and conduct the service, but no one can hear him. Did I mention that I'm pregnant? Oh - and this little park has no bathrooms. FUN. We think the end is near - but no. Every police car at the station begins to peel out, sirens blaring, lights flashing. After that, the minister finally announces they are husband and wife. Now off to the reception. We RACE to the reception(VFW) hall (I really need a bathroom) . It's locked up. Yeah! So we wait, and wait and wait - finally an aunt of the bride comes and opens it up. Nothing has been set up - other than the cake. No one knows what to do, so I end up setting up a table for the gifts, putting together the punch, getting Stacy to get the refreshments out, and I start pouring punch. That's what I do for the next hour and a half. Finally the happy couple leave,and I then help clean up. And that's the last I ever heard from Alice No thank you, no phone call, nothing. Not that I'm bitter. So what's the worst wedding you've attended/ |
This precious local Mexican girl announced her wedding plans. The family immigrated here about 15 years ago and everyone loves them! I was excited because my family would get to see an authentic Mexican wedding, which they assured us they were having.
It was held in midsummer in this gorgeous but un-airconditioned stone church at a nearby college. Because we knew there would be a crowd, we arrived quite early. For 30 minutes before the wedding, bridesmaids and groomsmen were wandering casually up and down the aisle...so much for the surprise effect. At about 15 minutes after the appointed hour, they started an informal rehearsal! The Americans in the audience were looking around like, "What the ??" She had chosen some American friends to be attendants to carry some ropes of ivy down the aisle. Only thing was, no one was telling them what to do and they were looking around in dismay. Finally the wedding ground into action. The ivybearers came cluelessly down the aisle, looked around, gave up, and sat down in the front! Then the groomsmen apparently got bored during the sermon and did the same! One groomsman's cell phone rang and he left. The mariachi band was wandering in and out. The priest did the ceremony in Spanish and then did the WHOLE THING in English. By now, it was surely 90 degrees in the church. I told my daughter if she got married in that church in the warm months, I wasn't coming. (So she did it in December.) The reception was just as bad; apparently the dad invited every Latino in Georgia to it and they ran out of food. And the dad owns a huge restaurant! We couldn't move at all, they had very little food left by the time we got into line, and we left when people started getting thrown in the pool. It was totally unlike any other Mexican wedding I've been to; the rest were classy and tasteful. I spent the next couple of years having to assure the Americans who went that most Mexican weddings are nothing like that. |
The worst wedding I ever attended was the wedding of a high school / college classmate of my husband's: "Aaron".
Aaron had been raised as a Conservative Jew. Once in college, he rebelled and became totally non-religious. Some time after college, he "got religion" and decided to become a practicing Orthodox Jew. In Orthodox Judaism, it's common for a matchmaker to introduce a young man and a young woman who might be well matched. If they hit it off, they sometimes get married pretty quickly. So, Aaron had been introduced to this young woman, "Leah", and they set a wedding date six weeks (!) away. They sent out wedding invitations instructing guests to email (!) their responses. Before and during the wedding ceremony, men and women were separated (very common in Orthodox Judaism). Before the ceremony, I made my own way, chatting with other women guests, but my poor DH had to pray along with the groom and all the other men... He was less than thrilled. The ceremony itself was beautiful. Then came the Reception From Hell. The seating at the reception was totally haphazard. Everyone at my table was a high school friend of the groom's, except me (placed there as my DH's wife) and one random guy who was a coworker of the groom's. The one random guy looked absolutely miserable, seated with no one he knew. There were huge gaps in the seating arrangements, because everyone who didn't respond was evidently assumed to be coming. There was dancing (men and women were again separated). At one point, a line of women danced onto the floor, rocking their arms as if cradling babies, while the band played a lullaby. Hint much? All the kosher caterers in Boston are booked up years in advance, because there are so few of them. So the happy couple had arranged catering from the local kosher Chinese restaurant (!!). And as if that weren't bad enough - THEY RAN OUT OF FOOD. THEY FREAKING RAN OUT OF FOOD. So they sent back to the restaurant for more food. After a nice long delay while the food was prepared, it was sent over, and by the time it arrived it was COLD. And there was no cake, pareve or otherwise. DH exchanges emails with Aaron from time to time (he and Leah have a baby) but I haven't spoken to him since. Oh, and the thank-you card? Over a year late. |
I attended a wedding my freshman year (as a guest with one of my guy friends) that was AWFUL. The bride was his friend from HS. The bride and groom were both 19 and worked at a local Walmart. When he called her to RSVP, she sounded really excited and told her that her dad had "spared no expense" and it was going to be a really great event.
It started off on a bad note. The church had no air conditioning and it was 90 degrees outside! The ceremony was scheduled to begin at 1:00. The bride overslept! It didn't start until 3:30! The pianist had another wedding at 2:00, so she left & they had to walk down the aisle in silence. A bunch of guests left because it was taking entirely too long (the reception was scheduled to start at 2:00). By the time the ceremony was over, it was 4:00ish and I was starving (I hadn't eaten since like 10 AM). So I was looking forward to the food (since the invite said the menu was an Italian buffet). We pull up to the place, and it's the GYM of a local veteran's hall. THERE ARE NO CHAIRS. NOWHERE TO SIT. EVERYBODY HAD TO STAND. There is also no DJ, BAND, SINGER, DANCING MONKEYS, NOTHING! NO ENTERTAINMENT! So we get inside and here's the kicker: The reception had NO FOOD. There was a sheetcake, a plate of cookies, and punch. NO FOOD. We were FLABBERGASTED. My friend asked the bride's mom when the food would be arriving. She replied, "Oh I know on the invite it said there would be a buffet, but we just could afford it. Sorry. You can put your gifts on the floor in the corner." The bride was just as happy as can be, there was no indication that she was upset about the way things were going. She walked up to us and asked us if we were enjoying ourselves. WTF? YOU HAVE NO FOOD, ENTERTAINMENT, OR SEATING! We are standing around. I could do this at home. This was the shortest reception I've ever seen. Within about a half hour of getting there, everyone had congratulated the couple, put their gifts on the table, and gotten out of there. That was the most awful thing I've ever gone to in my life. We were starving to death by the time we left and couldn't wait to leave so we could go out to eat. |
I was invited to the wedding of a cousin whom I have little contact with. She had an elaborate and traditional Mexican church wedding in a beautiful church. It was truly a spectacular ceremony. Then the reception from hell began.
When we were told that she wanted a traditional Mexican wedding, we weren't told one little thing. Traditional, in the mind of her annoying mother, meant that ALL THE WOMEN GUESTS PREPARE AND COOK THE FOOD FOR THE ENJOYMENT OF THE MEN!!! I couldn't believe it. There we were, all dressed up, expected to cook for someone else's father, brother, husband, etc. My mom, sisters, & I just said thanks for the invite, see ya! |
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I don't know about worst....but my mother's family has a knack for throwing memorable weddings.....shall I recap for you??
There was the time the brattiest cousin of them all hit the floor during his ceremony when the priest got to to the part about having children....(total crack up from the other cousins). Then later during the reception he picked up his bride to carry her out, and dropped her :). snicker snick snicker... And it seems like most of the wedding receptions on my mom's father's side (maternal grandfather) end up having a fist fight or two at them. I can't think of one in the last 25 years that hasn't. Like the time, another cousin got married...and there was a huge brawl back in the bar room of the hall that it was held at. My uncle went in to break it up, pulling people out of the pile, only to find his little brother (my other uncle) at the bottom of the pile. Where upon, fight-breaker-up brother started tossing dog pile people OUT THE DOOR (I am NOT KIDDING) for having pummelled his younger brother. oh, the policed were summoned for that one....it was hilarious actually. |
There seem to be some common themes emerging - hot (summer brides, beware), running late, and running out of food! This should be required reading for brides-to-be!
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I don't know if this even counts, but my husband's stepbrother had a courthouse wedding. The bride wore a BLACK dress. I was in charge of keeping her four little brats (ages 9, 7, 5 and 3) quiet during the ceremony. The only other people there were the bride's parents. My husband couldn't even come, because he was working, and there was no way for him to get out of it. The justice of the peace kept looking at my husband's step-brother and saying "You DO realize you're getting married, right? Are you sure you want to do this??".
They are still married, and have added two more kids into the mix. Hey - at least that makes two sets of kids (the two oldest and the two youngest) who are full siblings!:rolleyes::rolleyes: |
Aahh these stories are hilarious! I don't have a 'worst' wedding story per say - but I have an anecdote.
The first is from the wedding of my now ex's older brother. The wedding itself was fine, in a nice little Methodist church outside of Baltimore, and everything was going fine (well, except for the bride's father mistaking an Indonesian friend of the middle brother for one of the waitstaff and proceeding to insult him...:rolleyes:) until we get to the part where the ministers are making their little speeches. There were two ministers officiating, a man and a woman. The woman goes first. "Here we are today, gathered together on this beautiful day. Beth and Jean look beautiful. All of you look beautiful. This church is beautiful, the weather is beautiful," AND ON AND ON! She must have used the word beautiful every other word for a good 10 minutes! To make matters worse, the middle brother started to feel as though he was going to pass out and looked as pale as death, and hearing this minister use the word beautiful so many times did nothing to help. Finally she finishes (no disrespect but we all kinda wondered what she was on...), and the other minister goes up and says "Yes, everyone looks beautiful, even Bill! (the bride's dad). |
Ah the memories. My husband has a friend from college, we'll call her "Squeeky". Anyway, Squeeky married her college boyfriend who decided half-way through college to become a minister, so he dropped out and went to the seminary.
Their wedding took place in the chapel at the seminary and the director of the seminary was the officiant. During the vows he told Squeeky that now that she was entering the bonds of marriage, it was her duty to submit to her husband's wishes. At this point my own husband had to lean over to ask me to release his hand because I was squeezing it so hard it was about to break. I remember Squeeky had to make all kinds of vows but her husband only had to pledge to love and honor her. I distinctly remember that Squueky was vowing things and her husband was pledging them. Not sure why the difference in language. Anyway, the reception was in a hall at the seminary, and when we get there, all we see is a cake. After standing around for about half an hour a guy comes in with a boombox that looked straight out of 1987 (this was in 1998) and puts a Christian music tape on- and not contemporary Christian, but very traditional old-school stuff. Finally the bride and groom arrive, they cut the cake (no mints, no nuts) and someone pulls out some 2-litres. Everyone helps themselves to cake and we sit down, waiting for the reception to "begin", then the throw the bouquet. No garter toss- against seminary rules- it's considered "lewd". Also no first dance or any dancing for that matter becuase it's also against seminary rules. So about 15 minutes after the cake was cut, all the guests were leaving. So cut to two years later when my husband and I are getting married. We get an e-mail from Squeeky stating that she cannot come to the wedding because it is in a Catholic Church. But no hard feelings, right? And she sends us a gift- a candle holder and candle. It's pretty, but when we were opening the gifts at the brunch the day after our wedding, one of my husband's groomsmen mentions that the candle holder looks very familiar. Turns out it was the gift that he had given Squeeky. :rolleyes: |
Here's one that still makes me laugh.
A friend of mine went to a very fancy & gorgeous wedding at the Crystal Cathedral in Garden Grove. I remember she showed me the invitation and it stated that the wedding was black-tie so of course, she is dressed up & her boyfriend is in a tux. She told me it was an absolutely stunning wedding ceremony. Then the reception started. It was in the basketball gym of their local rec center. She was told that there would be a buffet so after the ceremony, she's thinking they'll be having some sort of fancy dinner but instead, the guests were each given one Styrofoam cup with their name put on it in Sharpie marker b/c there were not enough cups to go around so you better not lose it. And it got worse. For "dinner" the guests stood in a buffet line so that they could be given a plastic plate with 8 ritz crackers (no joke) and there was a HUGE wedge of cheddar cheese that some old lady was giving each guest 2 small pieces from it. They also got a little bit of fruit. They got one ladle of punch and the wedding cake was a sheetcake with the bride & groom's picture on it. That's it. My friend couldn't believe it and when she told me, I couldn't stop laughing. |
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Also, if you've ever read the Five Languages of Love, it makes more sense. |
i. am. eloping.
i just dont understand?? i am confused thru my tears of laughter! i havent been to any completely disastrous weddings, some of them just had moments where everyone kinda looked at each other like "wha?" there was the lovely reception with the nazi servers. by the the time we hit the end of the buffet line, i could still see plate. that is a big thing with me: seeing plate. that means you were being super stingy with the food. another reception was held in a church basement. with grey concrete brick walls. how chic! there was one long decorated table, right up against the wall, which meant everyone had to squeeze to get to their seat. oh, and that table was just for the wedding party. across from them was about 4 rows of chairs. i elbowed my girlfriend and whispered "what, are we going to watch them eat?" i was halfway right. no tables for us guests. one girl had an absolutely awful soloist, one of her aunts. we STILL laugh at that. i think my least favorite experience was standing in southern VA, middle of July, 97 degree heat. in a full length bridesmaid gown. my daughter, the bell ringer, looked a complete frizzy mess by the time we got into the church. it had to be 80 inside, so hot that the brides veil was sticking to her forehead, and one of the jr. bridesmaids had to sit down because she felt faint. the church was slam-packed, people were standing in the back and on the sides. other than that it was a very nice wedding. |
One of the wierdest ones I went to was my boss's daughter's Greek wedding. The Greeks all stood outside the church talking until at LEAST a half hour after the service was supposed to start. The bride (who was not Greek) finally sent the ushers outside to tell them that they were locking the church doors in 5 minutes. Then, most of the service was in Greek. And the bride and groom didn't really DO anything, and they didn't SAY anything. They just kind of stood there and watched their own wedding happen. It mostly centered around these two crowns with a ribbon tieing them together that kept being put on their heads, and then switched, and then held up, and then switched again. Finally, at the end, the bride & groom walked around the altar 3 times, and that was that. The reception was extravagant. They had a buffet 6 tables long, including a chocolate fountain...and THEN they had a sit-down dinner. The only red-neck thing that happened the whole night was the bride's family had pre-purchased all of the alcohol that the catering company served, and the groom's family just started grabbing bottles of it as they left. Full, unopened litres of Crown Royal and Grey Goose. :eek::eek:
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My sister-in-law briefly (thank God, only briefly) attended this weird little church before she got married. By the time of her marriage, the jerk minister had moved out of state but she insisted on having him come back and officiate at her wedding.
So when the minister started to walk out with the groomsmen, he stiffened his back and leaned back and started almost duckwalking! And my brother-in-law walked just like him to the altar! (My husband says there's a similar scene in the movie "Arthur".) Then when the wedding party got up there, the minister said to my SIL, "In biblical days, married ladies were called "Hephzibah'. Can I call you Hephzibah?" and she nodded eagerly.So he did for the rest of the ceremony.:confused: I was a bridesmaid and I looked over at my husband and his brother, who were shaking silently with laughter behind the groom. I cut my eyes up at my husband's uncle, the soloist, behind the podium and he was making nauseated faces. This is the same site of the Mexican wedding I mentioned earlier in the thread and I've been to many weddings there. The other awful thing that happened at one of them: the couple had just said their vows and suddenly somebody is singing "Longer" as if he were one of the Munchkins! And then we realize it's the groom and he's serious! I had to put my face down in my lap for a long time until I knew I wouldn't fall over laughing. |
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maybe they thought they were wedding favors? :D (shoot, if i was a tad bit classless, i'd get in on the taking too!) |
I've been to lots & lots & lots of firehall/all purpose room receptions, so those don't fase me at all.
As for the "wha?" moment, one of my sisters got married and the singer at their wedding sang Forever and Ever Amen. This was bad enough but he didn't do a nice acoustic rendition, he sang to a karaoke machine. We all sat there desperately trying not to burst into laughter (hard with this crew). It became obvious later that this had been the a-hole groom's idea. |
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If you must sing, save it for the reception! |
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i mean i know bachelor/ette parties are veering from the traditional norm as far as the when, where, and even what... but as much as i enjoy unadulterated plastering in my young adulthood, please spare me the night before i walk down the aisle. i want to be ABLE to walk, not stumble reeking of Johnnie Walker and stale cigarettes. thanks. |
What about the worst wedding date ever?
I went to a really extravagant and no-expenses spared wedding for a sorority sister in Carmel. It was a Jewish wedding on a Sunday evening, held at the The Lodge at Pebble Beach. The wedding itself was amazing... my date, however, was not...
This was a guy who had graduated from an Ivy school, good family, fraternity man, and who had up to this point behaved like a total gentleman. Our dates had been really nice and romantic, and I thought he was the cat's meow. We'd been dating for a few months... How wrong I was... We had driven up 5 hours from LA to Carmel and stayed overnight from Sat to Sun. He was an absolute gentleman on Saturday... and then came the Sunday wedding... He proceeded to get incredibly wasted at the wedding and had to tell everyone, "You know, I'm not Jewish, but I was Lazer Wolf in Fiddler on the Roof... in high school!" It gets worse. He got up on our table and sang Fiddler on the Roof songs, until I pulled him down. I realized we had to get out of there. So we left the wedding early for our 5 hour drive home. It was totally pitch-black dark outside and within the first 30 minutes of the drive, my date rolled down my window and stuck his head out of it-- like a panting dog. Then something happened. I thought at first, "Is it snowing?" Nope... we were driving along at about 70 MPH and my date puked out the window... and in the car... and the wind whipped around and the puke ended up all over my car, ME, my hair, you name it. To make matters worse, when I dropped this loser off at this place in Santa Monica, he tried to kiss me goodnight! I dropped the car off for detailing the next morning and tipped the cleaners really well! "Lazer Wolf" sent me an apology email, but I never spoke to him again! |
The worst one I know about, I didn't attend. Long dramatic story, but a girl who had been one of my bffs all through junior and high school decided to get married. I was living thousands of miles away in another state going to college, and never met the guy. I remember she sent me a letter all excited about the wedding, but then put conditions on me to give me an invite. She accused me of not accepting the guy, blah blah blah, and to be honest I never met him because when I was home visiting she blew me off to spend time with him, to the point I was home for winter break three weeks, and never saw her or met the dude. However she invited my family, who didn't go because she was just being a freako.
For all the conditions she put on me, and her other general ridiculousness, she got divorced, HA HA HA! So on to the wedding. She wore a lingerie nightgown ensemble from Frederick's of Hollywood as a dress. Her flowers weren't fresh, they weren't silk, oh no, they were plastic and designed by a very tragic drag queen. The bridesmaids wore black, some lace, others leather. She gave the guests bad directions and they got lost (it was outdoors in a park), and neglected to mention the fee to get into the park. The food was a BBQ (nothing wrong with that), but she also made it a potluck, but people weren't aware of it so they didn't bring anything. And last, but not least, a skunk sprayed not once, but twice. Her reception then matched her attitude and behavior, it stank! I recently attended a sister's wedding at a very classy resort at Lake Coeur d'Alene. The invitation said semi-formal/cocktail and it was on a golf course (which has a dresscode anyway). Most of the guys were there with a lady, and and least in my case, he was a real trooper and went with me to buy a tie and shirt to coordinate with my dress. The other husbands and boyfriends were in similar outfits, and we all looked lovely. However two guys showed up, one in CARGO SHORTS and the other in JEANS, sporting a University hooded sweatshirt, wtf? I knew it was bad when our dates said "I managed to put on a collared shirt and a tie, that's just tacky" and keep in mind, these are Idaho boys who drive trucks, kill their own food, and many have wardrobes straight out of Cabela's, so to hear them crack on any guy was just hysterical. The wedding was awesome and classy, but those two guys cracked us up, and hearing Idaho guys discuss it made it funnier. Oh and at the end of the night a storm came up and blew the tent away, but we were drunk and didn't care. I think the worst thing that weekend was running into not one, not two, not three, but FOUR guys I have dated, and I've only dated five while living here. The fifth one I had seen the week before. :( |
from a post I made earlier in the "ghetto weddings" thread:
Oh my goodness. Y'all have some funny stories. Here's mine: My college roomate grew up in the same town I attended school. She still kept in touch with her people from high school who didn't go to college or remained in the area, so i kinda "hung out" with all of them when i wanted to get away from the campus crowd. SO.... our 1st year the roomate's ex-boyfriend made it known that he was going to try to reconcile with her, but she gave him no play. His retaliation: MARRYING ANOTHER GIRL THEY WENT TO HIGH SCHOOL WITH. No one took them seriously, so my roomate was like, I'll do anything to get u out of my life In about two weeks time, all the planning was done. We throw the girl a bridal shower and a bachelorette party because we were bored one weekend, and these two fools get married the next day in the bride's parents home. She comes down the stairs to K-Ci and JoJo's "All My Life" and is wearing her PROM DRESS... i lie to you not! the prom pictures were still on the mantle / altar. Her father officiates the wedding and that doesn't seem to bad right? WRONG! This man stops the wedding to ask if the groom knows Jesus as his personal Lord and Savior... and we waited for him to respond. and waited . . . and waited . . . I was in there CRYIN b/c the groom had this look on his face like, umm... can i get back to u on that? So after a definite pause, the bride's father / minister just starts praying and in the prayer says that this marriage will not be accepted in the Kingdom unless the groom repents and opens up his heart! We prayed for like 30 minutes until the groom finally realizes that this man was NOT going to finish the ceremony until he prayed the "Prayer of Salvation"... we were in the living room / church CRYING b/c we were trying to hold our laughter and the bride's father/ minister and other family members thought we were "moved by the Spirit"... after the wedding - the Bride gets into an argument with her father, gets her things from her bedroom, and declares, "I'm leaving! Don't ask when I'll be back!" and storms out of the house. Now we were laughing out loud and i had to run to the car b/c this mess was the absolute worst! So obviously, there is no reception. what do we do after the wedding you ask? We drive through the city (a caravan of like 5 cars full of college students and recent H.S. graduates) running red lights, honking our horns and blinking our lights, and we end up at the groom's apartment. Before we walk in the door he was like, "Hold on y'all, I promised my wife i would do this for her"... the groom runs into the house and turns on the stereo to DMX - Get At Me Dog and the proceeds to carry his bride over the threshold. We all enter the house and the newlyweds were like, "Make yourselves comfortable. Y'all can check the refigerator or order some pizza or something. We're about to have our honeymoon." I had honestly blocked this ENTIRE weekend from memory until i started reading these posts. Thanks GC for giving me a good laugh for the rest of the week! |
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you know, one of my fiances friends always brings his own alcohol. at one reception that was running behind due to the 4 zillion pictures that had to be taken (they are both greeks), the rest of us sat, smelling food and cursing silently to ourselves. this friend decided to liven things up, so he asked my girlfriend for her diaper bag, went to his car, and loaded the thing up with about 4 bottles of crown royal and bacardi. we took turns one by one going to the soda machine, bought a 20 oz pepsi, emptied half, and proceeded to get twisted. it didnt take very long since we all had empty stomachs, and this is the wedding i spoke about early with the buffet nazis. drunk and hungry is not a good combo... we all (bride and groom included) went to waffle house later that night. |
@ Blutang...:eek::eek::eek:!
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One of my sorority sisters got married a few years ago. It wasn't bad as much as it was just tacky.
My roommate and I were both friends with this girl. Technically, if you are inviting people who are over the age of 18 and live together but are not a couple, you are supposed to send them each a separate invite. My sorority sister did not do this. My roommate and I got an invitation addressed to the both of us. I think my sorority sister was trying to cut costs but seriously???? These invitations were not the fancy kind so they were a $1.50 each at the most plus the postage back then was 34¢. Plus she invited about 30 people to the wedding. My old roommate and I joke to this day that we're each other's significant others. She started the ceremony much earlier than the invitation had stated. My friend and I showed up right on time only to see my friend already walking down the aisle. Argh. We would've been early except the park the wedding was held at was located in the heart of Downtown Orlando and it was about 4pm so everyone was still at work in the high-rises so we couldn't find parking anywhere. A lot of her guests had to park over a mile away from the site. The park itself was nice but it was located next to the Orlando Executive Airport. During her vows, planes were flying over the park drowning out the ceremony. We couldn't hear anything. My friend's dress did not fit her. She didn't want to pay for alterations. The dress fit her in the waist and the hips but was swimming on her in the bust area. Everytime she bent over, I really thought she was going to fall out of her dress. When she was sitting down at the table during the reception, people came by to her to wish her congratulations. If you stood over her, you had a clear shot right down her dress. And she wasn't wearing a bra. :eek: There was no dancing, bouquest toss, cake nor music of any kind at the reception. It was a private room with a big table that everyone sat at. It was much like you'd imagine for a rehearsal dinner. I get that she was trying to save money and what not but there's some things that you don't skimp on. The biggest being alterations on your dress. The pictures from that day will be looked at for a lifetime. She'll get to look back at pictures of herself with her boobs falling out of her dress. Now that I think of it, this is the 2nd wedding I've been to in a park by an airport and the 2nd time the reception has been more of a rehearsal dinner type thing. I guess I have bad luck? |
Not the worst, but funny nonetheless
Okay, reading y'alls reminds me of two more . (I think being greek means you have more weddings to go to, hence more stories).
One of my sisters was getting married on Galveston Island in Texas. She was married in beautiful Victorian-era St. Patrick's Cathedral. The bride and bridesmaids came to the wedding in a trolley with a big sign that said "Get me to the church on time!" So far - cute! So we are in this gorgeous, recently restored cathedral. The organ starts, and a high-pitched nasally soprano starts singing. "OOOOOOOO. . .my loooooooove, my daaaaarrrlliiinnng, I've hungered for your touch . . . " Yep, "Unchained Melody". We are stifling giggles in the Gamma Phi section. Next up - "Ave Maria". The bride had had medical problems as a child, and the Virgin Mary was her patron saint. She had a bouquet to lay at the feet of a lovely carved statue of Our Lady at the front of the cathedral. Somehow, no one had noticed that Lisa is about 5' tall, and the foot of the statue is about 6' off the ground. She attempts to place the bouquet - no luck. She jumps - again, no dice. Finally a groomsman comes to her aid. The reception was at Moody Gardens, and very tasteful. HOWEVER - she had an "undersea" theme, and the centerpieces included long, tall vases with goldfish. Real goldfish. Who had apparently been there some time, without enough oxygen. Dead fish at the wedding is not a good thing. I have a thing about weddings that are taken over by the photographer. I was at a wedding for a fraternity brother of my (ex) husband. After 30 minutes of sitting and waiting for the happy couple to emerge from pictures, we left, went to a bar, had a few drinks and went back. The groom wasn't thrilled, but I think you have an obligation to let your guests at least go get a seat in the church hall and have some punch while you take a bizillion pictures. We went back, behaved ourselves, and ate our sheet cake and drank our Hawaiian Punch. |
When I was a bridesmaid at the wedding of my friend from HS, all of it was fabulous...... except ... they decided not to hire a DJ, so after food was served and such... everything just kinda died... and they met at a line dancing bar and both like dancing, so you'd think they would've figured out some way around the expense of a DJ == sigh ==
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OMG!! i cant believe i forgot one of the worst weddings ever...
1. the bride lost her shoes. and it took 1 1/2 hours to find them.:mad: 2. the bridesmaids (all 8 or 9 of them) walked in to "Ribbon in the Sky"...but they had so far to walk, and there were so many of them, the song ran out, and someone thought nobody would notice if they just held the rewind button and start the song over in the middle. besides the fact that you could HEAR THE CD being skipped backwards, they had to redo it. three times. 3. the groom was african, and so was the pastor. whether they actually got married, only they know. i didnt understand a damn thing. 4. the reception started 2 hours late. she came in from her 4 billion pics, cut the cake, tossed the bouquet, did a toast, and left. no first dance, nothing. apparently they had a flight to catch for their honeymoon that same evening. they didnt even get to eat...and trust me, this reception was at least 10k. instead of getting served salad, then entree, then dessert, all three were waiting on the table, and they told us just to come sit and eat, dont worry about place cards or saying grace!! her mother was super pissed, when, 6 months later, her daugher returned with a newborn (apparently she was expecting during this whole event and nobody knew). she hasnt returned back to her husband since. i think that was almost 7 years ago... |
Neither of these happened at weddings I actually attended, but people still get a kick out of them. Here are the two bad wedding stories...
1. I worked as a receptionist in a chiropractic office in high school. One patient that regularly came in was very much a hick. I don't mean to be mean, because she was a very nice lady. However, she was straight up redneck: we would have to remind her not to go barefoot around in our office because her feet were gross and unsanitary, and she would always post-date her payments to us about a week (because she was always just one step ahead of overdrawing her account and the collections agency) until we started demanding she pay in cash, etc. etc. Anyway, this woman -- we'll call her Dawnna -- was incredibly friendly and always eager to share the goings on of her life to the office staff. One day came in with pictures from her half-sister's wedding. Nobody knew Dawnna's sister or anything, but we were happy to look at the pictures. I guess whatever Dawnna's social condition was ran in the family: it was the most atrocious wedding I've ever seen. Dawnna's sister, Shawnna, was 8mos pregnant which is fine, whatever, I don't look down on pregnant women getting married except the princess seamed dress actually actually splitting at the seams because it hadn't be altered correctly. Not to mention the fact that Shawnna was significantly overweight and the spaghetti straps were far too tight and cutting into her shoulders. However, Shawnna had apparently found the money to make one alteration to her dress: in honor of her unborn baby, Shawnna got a gigantic butterfly tattooed from shoulder to shoulder and down to her mid back. She had her seamstress alter the dress to make it backless in order to showcase her butterfly tat. The cake: the bride and groom's senior pictures (not a picture of the two of them together, but side-by-side senior pictures scanned onto the cake. Mullets and all.) The bridesmaids: the bride was only 18 and 7 months out of high school, so she had all the bridesmaids re-wear their prom dresses. The ceremony: performed by Shawnna and Dawnna's dad (who was a minister) under one of those horrific balloon arches in the VFW hall. Reception: VFW hall with cheese 'n' cracker platter. Standing room only. The guests: Many high school friends, drunkenly packed into the very tiny VFW hall. Flasks abounded in the pictures. Dawnna, naturally, got misty-eyed when showing us the pictures saying it was the most beautiful thing she'd ever seen. Good for Dawnna, I bet it was fun. Later on that year, Dawnna made me and the other staffers Christmas ornaments made out of -- I shit you not -- dried applesauce formed into a heart shape. I don't get it either. But bless Dawnna, she really was a very sweet woman. 2. Through college, I worked summers as a receptionist at a local country club. The country club is located in a very tony zip code of a very wealthy suburb, so you'd think that weddings there would be the epitome of class and style, and most were. One wedding, however, was so indescribable that I actually had to call a friend to "run something over" to my work so he could see it for himself.... This woman, let's call her Julie, was getting married for the second time. She had one attendant, her 11 year old daughter from a previous marriage. I knew something was going to go horribly wrong when the catering manager stopped by my desk a half-hour before Julie's ceremony was supposed to start in the club garden. The catering manager exasperatedly complained that she didn't think the bride and groom were going to "go through with it" and stomped off in frustration. Ooooh boy, I thought, I'm in for good old-fashioned freakshow. And I was not disappointed. The highlights: - Julie's and her fiance went through the ceremony with the minister but the fiance refused to sign the marriage license. - Julie's 11 y.o. daughter flounced into the reception in a pink mini-dress with those ripped-up looking handkerchief hems (you could see her butt when the wind blew). The dress had S&M style metal rings down the front, with a white lace ribbon criss-crossed through. Great for an adult halloween costume, totally inappropriate for a preteen. The daughter actually told me she didn't like the dress but her mom picked it out for her. - Julie and the fiance spent the majority of the reception screaming at each other on the club patio while the minister tried to mediate. - At one point, Julie walked by my desk and through tears demanded that I call her a cab so she could leave. Julie's dad marched over to me, pointed a finger in my face and growled "Don't you dare call that cab." I smiled politely and told them I was going on my dinner break and I would be happy to do whatever it was they decided when I got back. - Julie's fiance finally, FINALLY signed the license after two hours of screaming, but not before the best man drunkenly tried to punch the minister because the minister wasn't "minding his own business." The minister quickly ran out. - One guest brought an escort. An actual bonafide prostitute. I know she was an escort because she wore a 1980s red taffeta minidress with a sequined halter bodice, was at least 50 years old and incredibly haggard looking, and asked her date (decked out in his finest Don Johnson "Miami Vice" gear) "what do you do for a living, honey?" Totally awesome. - One poor old woman started choking on the chicken dinner at the reception. The heimlich worked, but I still had to dial 911. The paramedics pretty much broke up the party. The bride left in tears. I LOVE bad weddings! |
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OMFG, ROTFLMAO, GTFOOHWTBS i am dying over here! i have tears in my eyes and because i can't laugh as loud and as hard as i want to i am practically dying in my cube!!!!!!!!! |
It's going to be my cousin's. She's having it webcasted from Vegas.
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1.) Will she be married by "Elvis"?
2.) Does webcasting mean you don't have to go? |
My worst: I went with my parents. And they were the only people I knew. End of story.
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I haven't been to one that was a total trainwreck, but if you put all of these together, you'd have one.
-The NPC sister who invited many of my sorority sisters to her wedding. The wedding was wonderful, but at the reception: --There were cold cuts and jello molds at the buffet, with nothing else. --The radio was played for the entertainment. The highlight was the disc jockey announcing that he understands that he's the entertainment for the wedding of Sharon and Dave, so Mazel Tov. Then he played "Paradise By the Dashboard Lights". --The Best Man's toast included the old phrase about not buying the cow. --Cash bar. Need I say more? -At a sister's wedding, the soloist took ill the day before, so her stand-in appeared, without her knowledge. She sang so badly, you can hear her on the tape, saying, "What is that awful screeching?!!!" You can see most of the guests staring at the soloist in shock. -I didn't attend this one, but my parents did. Our redneck neighbors (who have thankfully moved) had the standard firehall wedding. The bride's uncle wore his best t-shirt, stating "Boogey Til You Puke" in glitter. Said shirt did not cover "the Great American Crack Problem", and he wore a cowboy hat to match his t-shirt. I guess that means he was fashionably coordinated in his book. Uncle Bubba, who was a studly 350+ pounds, pulled a chair up to the buffet, got himself a fork & spoon, and ate directly out of the various bowls and platters. My parents decided that they weren't that hungry and left. |
I'm so happy I don't have any of your friends as my friends.
-Rudey |
My MIL said my wedding was the worst wedding she has ever attended... :( :(
The thing is my husband and I eloped. Then we had a "wedding ceremony" at a destination location for our families. We probably should have taken that $8K to $10K and put it toward a stock fund for the house... |
She SAID that to you???Your MIL said that to you???:eek:
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