The most weird or stupid news story you heard today.
I thought we could use a thread for all of those "serious" news stories that are just a little bit weird, or maybe made you laugh. Here is mine for today:
British Police Crack Missing Gnome Case British police crack missing gnome case Two women charged after for pilfering from gardens in Central Scotland MSNBC Updated: 1:48 p.m. ET Aug. 24, 2005 In an apparent breakthrough in a series of mysterious garden raids in Scotland, police in Britain have charged two women after discovering a huge cache of garden gnomes, the BBC reported Wednesday. Police reportedly found least 40 gnomes, hedgehogs, rabbits and furniture in a house in Alloa, Clackmannanshire in central Scotland in what they described as an Aladdin's cave of garden ornaments. They also unearthed more than 60 plant pots and 25 solar lights, according to the BBC. People in Stirling, Clackmannanshire and Falkirk in Central Scotland had complained that gnomes, hedgehogs and rabbits had gone missing, it said. The discovery was the culmination of an 11-day police investigation into the spate of thefts. Cracking the case was described as a "significant achievement" by Detective Constable Roy Lake, but the challenge of making sure the gnomes had a home to go to remained, the BBC said. "Our task now is to identify who the items belong to and ensure they are given back to their rightful owners," he was quoted as saying. "an Aladdin's cave of garden ornaments." Hahaha. :) |
This wasn't today...but I thought it was still kind of funny:
http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb/news/story?id=2142263 Apparently, a former member of the Marlins dared their batboy to drink a certain amount of milk in a short period of time. When the team found out, they suspended him for 6 games (roughly equivilent to what Raffy Palmeiro got for steroid use). |
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Just more testament to the fact that the steroid policy isn't strong enough. I say ban them for the rest of the season, if not for life....
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Man Arrested in Practical Joke Gone Awry
Idiot!
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20050829/...t/prank_arrest SAVANNAH, Ga. - A Savannah man was arrested after he told a 13-year-old girl to hand a note to a bank teller threatening a holdup, police said. Michael Lyons, 45, told police that he and a group of girls celebrating his daughter's birthday were trying to play a practical joke. The note said "Give me all of your money, this is a stick up," according to a police report. While Lyons was getting money out of an ATM on Friday, the girl went into the bank and handed the note to a teller. The teller sounded the bank's alarm and police and FBI surrounded the building searching for suspected burglars. Instead, they found Lyons and the group of girls. Lyons was charged with criminal attempt of robbery by intimidation, said Savannah-Chatham Metropolitan Police spokesman Bucky Burnsed. "You can't yell fire in a crowded theater, can't joke about a bomb in your luggage at the airport, and you can't write notes to cashier that say 'This is a stick up,'" Burnsed said. ___ |
cell phone stories
washington post
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All the idiots who ignored the Katrina evacuation warnings and then called 911 to have someone come rescue them get my vote for stupid news story.
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Students can use 'f-word' up to 5 times per lesson
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/9132814/
U.K. school tailors policy to foul mouths Students can use 'f-word' up to 5 times per lesson Updated: 3:32 p.m. ET Aug. 30, 2005 As children throughout the country head back to school, many of them are probably muttering a few choice words about the prospect of returning to the classroom and the expected onslaught of homework. But can they utter those choice words and swear at their teachers? If they’re heading back to school in one town in England, then yes, they can. According to a report in the U.K.’s Daily Mail, one school in the town of Wellingborough is allowing pupils to swear at teachers, providing they only do so no more than five times in a class. A tally of how many times the f-word is used will be kept and if the class exceeds the limit, they will be “spoken” to, the newspaper reported. The school believes the policy will improve behavior, but parents and parliamentary members have condemned the rule and warned it would backfire. According to the Daily Mail, assistant headmaster Richard White said the policy was aimed at 15- and 16-year-olds in two classes which are considered troublesome. "Within each lesson the teacher will initially tolerate (although not condone) the use of the f-word (or derivatives) five times and these will be tallied on the board so all students can see the running score," the Daily Mail quoted White as writing in a letter. "Over this number the class will be spoken to by the teacher at the end of the lesson." According to the report, headmaster Alan Large said he had received no complaints about the policy. ------------------------------------------------------------------------- Can I just say, had I EVER used the f-bomb in class especially toward a teacher, I would STILL be grounded...and probably for the rest of my natural life. But Conservative member of parliament Ann Widdecombe said the policy was based on “Alice in Wonderland reasoning,” the Daily Mail reported. “What next? Do we allow people to speed five times or burgle five times? You don't improve something by allowing it, you improve something by discouraging it,” Widdecombe was quoted as saying. The newspaper also reported that the 1,130-pupil school plans to send “praise postcards” to the parents of children who do not swear and who turn up on time for lessons. |
http://msnbc.msn.com/id/9127549/
Missing: 2 ft., 8 lb., monkey wearing blue pants SPRINGDALE, Ohio - The bulletin issued by police in the southwest Ohio town of Springdale describes the subject as two feet tall, weighing eight pounds, clad only in blue pants and prone to sleeping in trees. Dillion, a circus monkey, fled into a nearby woods early on Monday after being frightened by a train whistle from tracks near where the circus was performing in Springdale, in northern Hamilton County. Trainer Philip Hendricks, who is part of the Hendricks Brothers Circus, says Dillion, who has a white face, brown body and is wearing a leash, is usually confident in new surroundings but the train whistle sent him scurrying. The circus is leaving town Thursday morning and Hendricks is worried that his monkey won't be found before then. Hendricks suggests that anyone who spots Dillion try to lure him with food. He's fond of apples, oranges, nuts, berries -- and Kentucky Fried Chicken. ETA: Missing Monkey Found :) |
Woman, 73, Accused of Shooting Husband
Oh my! Apparently, he had VD. **I had a laughing smiley until I finished the article. She was really trying to kill him.
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20050831/...derly_shooting AUBURN, W.Va. - A 73-year-old woman has been accused of shooting her 69-year-old husband because she believed he contracted a venereal disease while having an affair with a neighbor. "He was treated a few weeks ago, apparently for a venereal disease. That's apparently where it (the shooting) came from," said Trooper J.E. Stout of the State Police's Harrisville detachment. Mollie A. Hardbarger of Auburn is accused of shooting her husband Hallie once in the abdomen with a .22-caliber rifle on Tuesday. She was charged with malicious wounding. Hallie Hardbarger was in critical condition Wednesday at St. Joseph's Hospital in Parkersburg, said hospital spokeswoman Jill Parsons. Mollie Hardbarger complained of chest pains after she was arrested Tuesday and also was taken to the hospital, police said. She was in good condition Wednesday, Parsons said. "She is under 24-hour guard at the hospital. We'll continue to do that until she's released," Stout said. After she is released from the hospital, she will be arraigned in Wood County Magistrate Court. |
Jesse Jackson arrives in New Orleans, solves all problems within 90 min., calls Larry King to report live on natl. TV.
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Hurricane victim hospitalized with scalded mouth, tongue, and throat.
"I just followed directions to boil water before drinking." |
NY Senator Chuckie Schumer suggests that Bush ask Sandra Day to stay on the court for a year or so, as "acting chief justice".
Does he think that in a year or so (and after the 2006 elections) the libs might control the Senate? |
Fired for eating pizza, man wins contest
September 5, 2005 BY MICHAEL LIEDTKE Advertisement SAN FRANCISCO -- A computer engineer who lost his job because he ate two pieces of pepperoni pizza left over from a company meeting has been named the winner of an offbeat Internet contest that solicited stories about outrageous firings. A panel of Silicon Valley judges assembled by Simply Hired, a Mountain View startup that sponsored the contest, picked Jim Garrison's strange tale from more than 1,000 entries submitted during the past month. The reward: a free Caribbean cruise that will include passengers famously fired by Donald Trump on his popular TV show, "The Apprentice." Garrison, 39, prevailed over some tough competition. The runners-up included these bizarre stories: a furniture mover who got fired after he and a co-worker were caught fencing with some adult sex toys that they found in a customer's bedroom; a worker who misunderstood a manager's instructions to send some sensitive data to microfilm and e-mailed it to a "Michael Finn" instead; and a warehouse worker found doing perverse things with the prosthetics made by his employer. It made for such fascinating reading that one woman posted an account about how she got fired for spending too much company time on Simplyfired.com. 'I would have been happy to pay' Garrison, who lives in Highlands Ranch, Colo., said he never dreamed he would be fired after he ate two of the six pieces of pepperoni pizza left over from a company meeting. Although he didn't work in the department that held the meeting, Garrison figured the food was fair game since it looked like it was going to be wasted if it wasn't eaten. What he didn't know is that several other employees had already worked out a plan to take the leftover pizza home. When they discovered one-third of the leftover pizza had been eaten, the employees reported Garrison to management, leading to his firing last November. "If somebody had warned me, I would have been happy to pay for the pizza," Garrison said. Garrison declined to identify his former employer. He is now happily employed as a programmer at a satellite TV company. On the Web: www.simplyfired.com |
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