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exlurker 11-20-2014 05:55 PM

Phi Kappa Psi at U of Virginia Voluntarily Suspends Activities
 
Phi Kappa Psi at the U of Virginia has voluntarily suspended activities pending an investigation into alleged rape / sexual assault.

http://wvtf.org/post/uva-fraternity-...nds-activities

Additionally, the Phi Psi house has been vandalized.

Edited to add: a report about the vandalism of the Phi Psi house and the "demands" of the person or persons anonymously claiming responsibility:

http://www.cavalierdaily.com/article...nymous-demands

amIblue? 11-20-2014 06:20 PM

Here is the link to the Rolling Stone article. It is not for the faint of heart.

http://rol.st/1yStBLf

moe.ron 11-20-2014 10:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by amIblue? (Post 2300222)
Here is the link to the Rolling Stone article. It is not for the faint of heart.

http://rol.st/1yStBLf

Wow, definitely not for the faint of heart.

1964Alum 11-20-2014 10:26 PM

I live pretty close to Charlottesville, and people have known about this for years and years. These criminal acts have gone unreported and even unacknowledged for the reasons stated in the Rolling Stones article. Senator Warner of VA has introduced a bill in Congress giving the US Dept.of Justice jurisdiction of cases such as these. Where this will go is anyone's guess.

I HOPE that all the GLOs on the UVA campus join together along with other students to lead in demanding accountability for these acts and supporting criminal prosecution where indicated. Along with support for the young women to bring charges against these young men.

We have friends with daughters and granddaughters at UVA who are just beside themselves with anxiety and concern for their loved ones. Sanctioned criminal rape should have no place whatsoever in fraternity life anywhere.

PinkSkyAtNight 11-21-2014 09:44 AM

If you haven't read the story, you should be warned: it describes in very graphic detail a pre-planned gang rape involving 7 men who took turns violently abusing a freshman girl who thought she was going on an actual date with a junior member of Phi Kappa Psi.

And, just so you know, the article also goes into detail about another gang rape that happened in the house decades earlier, where a man was prosecuted after confessing.

This article is stirring up a lot of PTSD for rape and sexual assault survivors. And the woman at the center of the story came forward because she met two other women on campus who also were gang raped at Phi Kappa Psi. Be prepared to feel physically ill: http://www.rollingstone.com/culture/...ampus-20141119

1964Alum 11-21-2014 03:11 PM

Students there are organizing, holding rallies and the like. There are several petitions going around, including one calling for the abolishment of the Greek system. IMO this is a golden opportunity for Greeks to step up to the plate and show leadership on campus.

http://www.cavalierdaily.com/article...sexual-assault

DrPhil 11-21-2014 03:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PinkSkyAtNight (Post 2300263)

:mad: I am sickened and outraged.

This quote resonates: "Grab its motherfucking leg"

Everything in that story and the use of "it" illustrate that sexual assault and rape are dehumanizing abuses of power rather than being about sex.

AOII Angel 11-21-2014 03:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DrPhil (Post 2300288)
:mad: I am sickened and outraged.

This quote resonates: "Grab its motherfucking leg"

Everything in that story and the use of "it" illustrate that sexual assault and rape are dehumanizing abuses of power rather than being about sex.

That and the complete lack of empathy displayed by students as UVA towards victims of sexual assault struck me as horrific. Dehumanize the victim and tell them that they should just get over it.

KDCat 11-21-2014 03:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 1964Alum (Post 2300285)
Students there are organizing, holding rallies and the like. There are several petitions going around, including one calling for the abolishment of the Greek system. IMO this is a golden opportunity for Greeks to step up to the plate and show leadership on campus.

http://www.cavalierdaily.com/article...sexual-assault

It's a little late for that. Whatever they do is going to be seen as reactive, and rightly so.

amIblue? 11-21-2014 04:05 PM

These women should never have been advised of any other option than to report these atrocities to the police. It is not up to universities to adjudicate felonies.

1964Alum 11-21-2014 04:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KDCat (Post 2300291)
It's a little late for that. Whatever they do is going to be seen as reactive, and rightly so.

Not if they band together and create some proactive programs. As it is, something ghastly happens, it is exposed, and Nationals step in and close chapters and pull pins. That is a consequence but is not creating protocols for addressing the problem directly and putting into place preventative measures.

I think what we all need to understand is rightly or wrongly the Greek system is seen as a locus of the problems. We need to be part of the solution. And through our actions, not just our words.

Where are chapter advisors addressing the problem of fraternities supplying alcohol to minors in their houses, not to mention date-rape drugs? What protocols are in place for those who know these kinds of things are going on in their houses but say or do nothing to stop it? Where are the sorority chapter advisers insisting on very clear cut guidelines for members to protect themselves? Where is the support for members who have been raped and being fearful of filing charges against the perps?

33girl 11-21-2014 04:45 PM

All those are good ideas. But they can get twisted around. For example:

Quote:

sorority chapter advisers insisting on very clear cut guidelines for members to protect themselves
Girl is platonic friends with boy, boy calls her upset about this or that, girl goes to his fraternity house to help him talk it out, girl gets terminated because she wasn't accompanied by 5 sisters. Better women learn how to handle themselves and avoid averse situations without being shepherded by sorority rules.

Why were women supporting this fraternity at all?

ETA: One of the Cavalier articles says that it's not for sure that all seven men were fraternity brothers. Is this true?

exlurker 11-21-2014 04:51 PM

Update: Problems with the Selection of Person to deal with Investigation

http://wtvr.com/2014/11/21/mark-fili...investigation/

dukemama 11-21-2014 04:56 PM

I don't believe there's any coincidence that UVA selected a federal judge with ties to Phi Kappa Psi to lead the investigation.

exlurker 11-21-2014 04:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 33girl (Post 2300304)
. . . s
Why were women supporting this fraternity at all?

. . . . ?

Excellent question, and one that I hope sorority members, advisers, Panhellenics, and so on will seriously ask themselves. It's troubling to know that sororities can feel that it's more important to be able to mix / party with (at least some) fraternities than to support undergrad sisters in cases like this.

For example, see
http://wtvr.com/2014/11/21/uva-stude...-lot-of-power/

1964Alum 11-21-2014 05:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 33girl (Post 2300304)
All those are good ideas. But they can get twisted around. For example:



Girl is platonic friends with boy, boy calls her upset about this or that, girl goes to his fraternity house to help him talk it out, girl gets terminated because she wasn't accompanied by 5 sisters. Better women learn how to handle themselves and avoid averse situations without being shepherded by sorority rules.

Why were women supporting this fraternity at all?

Well, back in the dark ages when I was an active, a Chi O at the state's flagship university was abducted, raped, murdered, and then dumped in a field. Our chapter advisers were all over that horrific event. (We, the murdered Chi O and I, had been high school classmates, so it hit even closer to home for me. A male friend from high school was one of the group of young men who found her.) There were no rules, per se, but many firmly stressed guidelines and given over a period of time and often repeated. There was some initial eye-rolling, but we took them seriously. An alternative to meeting an upset young frat friend at his house would be to meet elsewhere or even at the sorority house.

I don't know why young women were supporting this fraternity. I suppose they wanted to be seen as being "cool". In their minds this was considered a "top tier" frat. And also the fear of being blamed by other students. The lack of support for victims among other students is appalling.

exlurker 11-21-2014 05:09 PM

An NBC affiliate posted Phi Kappa Psi's statement.

http://www.nbc29.com/story/27451877/...-stone-article

1964Alum 11-21-2014 05:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by exlurker (Post 2300305)
Update: Problems with the Selection of Person to deal with Investigation

http://wtvr.com/2014/11/21/mark-fili...investigation/

People here in VA are all over this incident and a case of conflict of interest would be quickly pointed out. I know our attorney general Mark Herring (all the candidates love to come to my small city and meet us in small groups) and am pretty confident he will oversee an honest and complete investigation. If he doesn't, he will hear about it very clearly.

1964Alum 11-21-2014 06:11 PM

This article in The Cavalier Daily is being well received. Excerpted:

There is something we can do about this. The best remedy for ambiguity and false facts is the provision of real information. Greek women need to make it very clear to first-year girls that sexual assault — as it relates to discussion, activism and reporting — is not evaluated during sorority recruitment. This should be done in a clear, explicit fashion — most sensibly through official presentations given to first-year women in their dorms.
The ISC is moving toward more transparency, sponsoring a number of Go-Greek Nights in recent years — though these events are opt-in, and unsurprisingly tend more along the lines of, “What should I wear to Round Robbins?” and less along the lines of, “I was assaulted last weekend, but didn’t want to report it because I am worried about the stigma within the Greek system.” By establishing formal networks of communication between older women in the Greek system and first years predicated upon issues of sexual assault — a “some-contact policy,” if you will — we can begin to combat this.
The first six weeks of college are known as the “red-zone” for first-year women, who are more likely to be assaulted during this period than at any other point in their college careers. As a first year, I did not know this. I just wanted to get into Phi Psi.
Any opportunity to provide accurate information to this vulnerable population of women should and must be acted upon. Barriers to entry help define the Greek system, but barriers to information absolutely cannot.


http://www.cavalierdaily.com/article...idnt-know-then

DrPhil 11-21-2014 06:56 PM

^^^ My response to that article:

1. I want there to be fewer suggestions on what women should do to prevent this unless it will be matched by suggestions to men.

2. There are few, if any, articles written to men (in general) and fraternity men (in particular) on what to do to prevent themselves from being the perpetrator and from being the assistant to the perpetrator.

3. These incidents are in a GLO context but power struggles and community climates should be addressed beyond the GLO context. I believe more change happens when addressing both the larger issue and the GLO-specific issues.

WCUgirl 11-21-2014 08:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dukemama (Post 2300306)
I don't believe there's any coincidence that UVA selected a federal judge with ties to Phi Kappa Psi to lead the investigation.

A few things:

UVA didn't select him, Mark Herring did.

He wasn't selected to lead the fraternity investigation, he was selected to lead the university's policy revision. He was actually a very well-qualified candidate to do this, as his firm's profile page reflects (Kirkland Ellis).

I don't understand how people think a former prosecutor, assistant attorney general, and federal district judge is unable to lead an impartial/unbiased investigation merely because he was a member of the fraternity at issue, despite having been initiated at an entirely different university.

amIblue? 11-21-2014 09:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by WCUgirl (Post 2300337)
A few things:

UVA didn't select him, Mark Herring did.

He wasn't selected to lead the fraternity investigation, he was selected to lead the university's policy revision. He was actually a very well-qualified candidate to do this, as his firm's profile page reflects (Kirkland Ellis).

I don't understand how people think a former prosecutor, assistant attorney general, and federal district judge is unable to lead an impartial/unbiased investigation merely because he was a member of the fraternity at issue, despite having been initiated at an entirely different university.

While he may very well be capable of being impartial, the allegations in this situation are serious enough that there needs to be no room for doubt in the eyes of the public so that whatever decision is reached is unimpeachable in its integrity. Membership in the fraternity in question is sufficient to cast doubt in the eyes of the public.

Low D Flat 11-21-2014 09:27 PM

^^^ This. In fact, I'm shocked that Judge Filip apparently accepted the assignment in light of the appearance of conflict. There are a lot of excellent lawyers in this country who aren't members of Phi Psi.

1964Alum 11-21-2014 09:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DrPhil (Post 2300317)
^^^ My response to that article:

1. I want there to be fewer suggestions on what women should do to prevent this unless it will be matched by suggestions to men.

2. There are few, if any, articles written to men (in general) and fraternity men (in particular) on what to do to prevent themselves from being the perpetrator and from being the assistant to the perpetrator.

3. These incidents are in a GLO context but power struggles and community climates should be addressed beyond the GLO context. I believe more change happens when addressing both the larger issue and the GLO-specific issues.

Right now, the leaders on the UVA campus addressing this most serious issue are not GLO affiliated. And the organizations that have formed on campus addressing student rape are not what you would call "mainstream". The Greek Community on the UVA campus is most certainly mainstream. As is the student government organization to which many Greeks are elected. IMO it is in the interests of the campus Greeks to step up to the plate and demonstrate some leadership and get on board in a meaningful way.

In the best of all possible worlds it would be wonderful if young women didn't have to worry about being raped on campus due to the changes in the young men and the entire community was on board. But how realistic is this? If our daughter were currently on a college campus, I certainly wouldn't wait until the young men got on board to teach her self-preservation techniques. And would HOPE that there were support for her to employ these techniques on campus from her peers. And most certainly support for her should she be a victim.

It would be nice if we could be all things to all people, but we can't. Yes, there is a great deal of enabling behavior both on campus and off, including in police systems and the legal system. And even among alumni. And in this case the administration of the school. That must change as well. But about all we can do as individuals is within our own communities, including our GLOs.

MysticCat 11-21-2014 10:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by WCUgirl (Post 2300337)
I don't understand how people think a former prosecutor, assistant attorney general, and federal district judge is unable to lead an impartial/unbiased investigation merely because he was a member of the fraternity at issue, despite having been initiated at an entirely different university.

It's pretty basic, actually. Appearances matter; it's necessary not only to avoid actual conflicts, but also any appearance of conflict. Otherwise, there's the real risk of a perception of an inadequate investigation at best and a cover-up to protect Phi Psi at worst—especially given the perception, which certainly has a basis in fact, that fraternity members stick together and protect each other.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Low D Flat (Post 2300345)
In fact, I'm shocked that Judge Filip apparently accepted the assignment in light of the appearance of conflict.

That was my very first thought—why in the world did he accept? How could he not have seen it would raise eyebrows? It's a no-brainer.

Munchkin03 11-21-2014 10:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by exlurker (Post 2300308)
Excellent question, and one that I hope sorority members, advisers, Panhellenics, and so on will seriously ask themselves. It's troubling to know that sororities can feel that it's more important to be able to mix / party with (at least some) fraternities than to support undergrad sisters in cases like this.

For example, see
http://wtvr.com/2014/11/21/uva-stude...-lot-of-power/

Also, it's part of the "cool girl" thing that's such a big deal with the youngsters. A "cool girl" doesn't support other women when they're being attacked by men. A "cool girl" doesn't let that stuff happen to her because a "cool girl" knows how to handle her booze. Ugh.

1964Alum 11-21-2014 11:18 PM

^^^ And that it precisely why the "Cool Girls" in the GLOs need to make it very clear that it is not "cool" to protect a rapist. And for fraternity men to clearly and frequently state that it is disgusting and reprehensible to indulge or enable such behavior. Not at ALL "cool".

StealthMode 11-22-2014 12:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DrPhil (Post 2300288)
This quote resonates: "Grab its motherfucking leg"

That is the part of the article that made my blood run cold.
Quote:

Originally Posted by AOII Angel (Post 2300290)
That and the complete lack of empathy displayed by students as UVA towards victims of sexual assault struck me as horrific. Dehumanize the victim and tell them that they should just get over it.

The young lady's supposed friends saying that she should keep quiet or else none of them would have a chance of becoming Greek reminded me of people who have been hazed (to the point of injury) being told by other aspirants/pledges to keep quiet because getting the chapter suspended ruins everyone's chances at membership. Or when women want to file sexual harassment complaints in the workplace and are scolded for "wanting a good man to lose his job." This mentality of "shut up and keep our happy little world happy" is prevalent across so many domains I could puke.
Quote:

Originally Posted by 33girl (Post 2300304)
ETA: One of the Cavalier articles says that it's not for sure that all seven men were fraternity brothers. Is this true?

In the article, the young lady said she heard one of the men say (paraphrase), "Don't you want to be one of us?" which made me think there was a pledge or aspirant in the group of perpetrators.

KDCat 11-22-2014 09:25 AM

“Men always say that as the defining compliment, don’t they? She’s a cool girl. Being the Cool Girl means I am a hot, brilliant, funny woman who adores football, poker, dirty jokes, and burping, who plays video games, drinks cheap beer, loves threesomes and anal sex, and jams hot dogs and hamburgers into her mouth like she’s hosting the world’s biggest culinary gang bang while somehow maintaining a size 2, because Cool Girls are above all hot. Hot and understanding. Cool Girls never get angry; they only smile in a chagrined, loving manner and let their men do whatever they want. Go ahead, shit on me, I don’t mind, I’m the Cool Girl.

Men actually think this girl exists. Maybe they’re fooled because so many women are willing to pretend to be this girl. For a long time Cool Girl offended me. I used to see men – friends, coworkers, strangers – giddy over these awful pretender women, and I’d want to sit these men down and calmly say: You are not dating a woman, you are dating a woman who has watched too many movies written by socially awkward men who’d like to believe that this kind of woman exists and might kiss them. I’d want to grab the poor guy by his lapels or messenger bag and say: The bitch doesn’t really love chili dogs that much – no one loves chili dogs that much! And the Cool Girls are even more pathetic: They’re not even pretending to be the woman they want to be, they’re pretending to be the woman a man wants them to be. Oh, and if you’re not a Cool Girl, I beg you not to believe that your man doesn’t want the Cool Girl. It may be a slightly different version – maybe he’s a vegetarian, so Cool Girl loves seitan and is great with dogs; or maybe he’s a hipster artist, so Cool Girl is a tattooed, bespectacled nerd who loves comics. There are variations to the window dressing, but believe me, he wants Cool Girl, who is basically the girl who likes every fucking thing he likes and doesn’t ever complain. (How do you know you’re not a Cool Girl? Because he says things like: “I like strong women.” If he says that to you, he will at some point fuck someone else. Because “I like strong women” is code for “I hate strong women.”)”
― Gillian Flynn, Gone Girl

DrPhil 11-22-2014 09:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KDCat (Post 2300380)
“Men always say that as the defining compliment, don’t they? She’s a cool girl. Being the Cool Girl means I am a hot, brilliant, funny woman who adores football, poker, dirty jokes, and burping, who plays video games, drinks cheap beer, loves threesomes and anal sex, and jams hot dogs and hamburgers into her mouth like she’s hosting the world’s biggest culinary gang bang while somehow maintaining a size 2, because Cool Girls are above all hot. Hot and understanding. Cool Girls never get angry; they only smile in a chagrined, loving manner and let their men do whatever they want. Go ahead, shit on me, I don’t mind, I’m the Cool Girl.

This is hilarious.

The last sentence definitely doesn't exist (in my experiences). Every woman I know who fits at least some of the "cool girl" description gets annoyed when need be, angry when need be, and would cuss the man out if need be. One of the points is to be on level playing field with men and that includes treating men only how they deserve to be treated.

MysticCat 11-22-2014 11:01 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KDCat (Post 2300380)
“Men always say that as the defining compliment, don’t they? She’s a cool girl. . . .

Men actually think this girl exists. . . . Oh, and if you’re not a Cool Girl, I beg you not to believe that your man doesn’t want the Cool Girl. It may be a slightly different version – maybe he’s a vegetarian, so Cool Girl loves seitan and is great with dogs; or maybe he’s a hipster artist, so Cool Girl is a tattooed, bespectacled nerd who loves comics. There are variations to the window dressing, but believe me, he wants Cool Girl, who is basically the girl who likes every fucking thing he likes and doesn’t ever complain."

― Gillian Flynn, Gone Girl

Sure, men "always" say that. :rolleyes:

Yes, I know it's fiction—and I haven't read the book so I admit I don't know the context of the quoted portion or the narrative reliability of it—but without context it seems to me like it's just trading a form of sexual objectification for a massive stereotype.

33girl 11-22-2014 11:36 AM

That quote sounds like a bitter woman with no personality who pushed her friends aside for a man (and will eventually push her husband aside for her children) and can't believe she got dumped. Is that the context, or is that a woman we're supposed to root for? Because if so ugh.

pinksequins 11-22-2014 11:39 AM

Actually, I think KDCat makes a good point. Those men exist, and you don't have to be bitter. In some industries, this type of juvenile objectification is more pronounced, and if you object, you will be passed over or given the least desirable assignments. Sure, it's fiction and accordingly embellisjed, but there is a kernel of truth there.

33girl 11-22-2014 12:00 PM

Intimating that women must be fake because they act in a way that men find pleasing is kind of ridiculous, even in fiction.

DrPhil 11-22-2014 12:22 PM

No, that quote isn't saying a woman must be fake if she is acting in a way a man finds pleasing. The quote is saying there is pressure for a (heterosexual) woman to be perfect in pleasing a (heterosexual) man.

I agree with the foundation of that quote. Everyday I hear girls and women boast about being "tomboys"/"just one of the guys" and attempt to place themselves in all-male environments to prove they are "different than other women". The need to do that portrays OTHER women as overly emotional, catty, silly, gossipy, bickering, unable to have fun, uninterested in sports or other activities, and only concerned with falling in love and all that entails. I've even had women tell me they can't stand other women because of these traits they attribute to other women. I tell these women that they need to meet the women who also claim to be "different than other women". Then all these "different than other women" can fight it out for the "Different Woman Crown". Street Fighter style.

This also translates to how many of these women interact with men in romantic relationships. Always feeling the need to prove they are "different" so they won't scare a man away.

This shocks my feminist sensibilities and is the opposite end of the patriarchy and sexism scale (the opposite end is women being pressured to be "traditional prissy princess"). Just another way to encourage women to conform to the male-standard. It prevents people from just being themselves. If a woman farts, plays video games, has male friends, and loves sports it should be because that's what she wants to do. It shouldn't be because she feels the need to prove herself "cool enough" and above other women. It shouldn't mean she is void of expressing negative emotions from fear of being branded "just another emotional woman."

I think all of this factors into campus climates. That includes the fraternity that is considered awesome for getting the women. It also includes "the cool sorority" whose coolness is defined by how the fraternity men see them, sometimes sexually but mostly in terms of being fun to platonically be around. That happens in the NPHC so I don't doubt it happens in other councils and conferences.

pinksequins 11-22-2014 01:01 PM

33Girl, I disagree.

33girl 11-22-2014 02:10 PM

Quote:

If a woman farts, plays video games, has male friends, and loves sports it should be because that's what she wants to do.
That's what I meant I disagreed with in the quote - assuming that no woman really likes those things and she's putting on a show to act "cool."

Not only that, I think it's kind of denigrating to assume that men (of all ages) can't see through bullshit.

DrPhil 11-22-2014 02:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 33girl (Post 2300414)
That's what I meant I disagreed with in the quote - assuming that no woman really likes those things and she's putting on a show to act "cool."

I don't think that is the full point of the quote.

Some women are genuine and some women are perpetrating. Yet even the women who genuinely do those things (not because of a man) should not feel obligated to subscribe to this: "Cool Girls never get angry; they only smile in a chagrined, loving manner and let their men do whatever they want. Go ahead, shit on me, I don’t mind, I’m the Cool Girl."

I don't believe all men define "cool woman" in this manner. I do believe most men want some version.

1964Alum 11-22-2014 03:19 PM

http://wtvr.com/2014/11/22/universit...omment-page-1/

http://wtvr.com/2014/11/21/slut-walk...y-of-virginia/

1964Alum 11-22-2014 03:34 PM

Hopefully something constructive will come of this.

Excerpted:

Inter-Fraternity Council President Tommy Reid, a fourth-year College student, issued a statement shortly after Sullivan’s email. In it, he emphasized a mission of action by fraternities to act as primary agents for change in sexual assault.
“This is a temporary, short-term action that will ultimately benefit our University and our community in the long-term, not an impulsive move to blame rape on fraternities,” he said in an email. “The temporary suspension grants our fraternity system time to develop substantive and actionable solutions for the future.”
Reid said sexual assault was not just a fraternity problem, but a University-wide problem.
“At times, our organizations are placed with a disproportionate share of the blame for sexual misconduct,” he said. “The IFC recognizes that sexual assault is a problem in fraternities; we also recognize that we can be catalysts for the solution. Banning fraternities will not solve the complicated problem of rape in our society.”


http://www.cavalierdaily.com/section/news


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