Girls Who Dropped on Bid Day
Hi all! If you've read my posts from a while back, you know that I pledged Delta Gamma through COB and I am absolutely enthusiastic with my decision. With that said, this was my first time completing formal recruitment from the other side. Bid Day happened just last week for us, and I am so happy with our new member class :)
However, I'm a little disheartened as well. When we went to the meeting area to greet our new sisters, we realized that a couple of girls did not show up. We were excitedly holding signs with their names on them... only for them to never retrieve their gifts. A few girls came out, but dropped us before the party even really began. It was especially hurtful, as there was a DG legacy-- the only one who went through formal recruitment-- who dropped us on Bid Day as well. As a result, we did not meet quota. Has anyone else ever had this situation occur? |
Unfortunately this happens all too often. In my opinion, I would rather have women drop on bid day or right after than "try it out" for a bit. Mainly because (and this is a RA speaking) it is easier to snap bid or COB right after formal recruitment so that those women can join the NM class fairly seamlessly.
As for not making quota, if you matched quota during bid matching, then you made quota. Even if all of the women didn't stay. For example, if your quota said "50" and you matched 50 on the bid list, then you made quota. Even if you only had 40 stay at the bid day party. It is situations like this that make year round recruiting so important. Recruitment isn't just a two week frenzy once a year. It is a daily, hourly thing. It is women in letters participating in other on campus activities. It is women inviting friends over to the house or to the philanthropy event or just befriending the shy girl in class that turns out to be a rock star member. |
Congratulations on your new member class! As for the women that did not come back, unfortunately, many pnms get their hearts set on their first choice. They lack the maturity to see that they can be happy as part of another chapter. They may have signed their bid cards saying that they would accept a bid from their "back up" chapter and when that became a reality could not accept that they did not get their first choice.
Even through your first post, you shared that after you were extended a bid you stepped back to take some time to consider the financial and time commitments. Women get nervous and scared sometimes. Some may regret not accepting the bid extended and show up again next semester. Only they can control that aspect of it. Having experienced recruitment from the other side now, I am sure you see how hard it is from both perspectives. There are disappointed actives as well as pnms. The best thing to do now is share an enthusiastic welcome with your new members and enjoy getting to know them. Don't worry about the ones that got away. |
I remember a sorority whose pledge classes didn't show up on Bid Day for two years. Not a single girl. I can not imagine the heartbreak.
The ladies above are right--all you can do is make recruitment an ongoing thing. However, this is a caveat to women who want to pledge a WRC and "try to make it shine"; remember that you will almost certainly have to deal with nonstop recruitment. |
How heartbreaking to have a legacy accept and then drop you on bid day.
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Congratulations on the New Members you took, and remember to keep their spirits high! Don't give them a chance to regret the decision they made! |
To expand on the year-round recruiting comments:
Your new members are some of your best recruiting tools. They are generally younger and know other freshman/sophomore women who aren't sorority members. I'm sure they all have friends in classes or roommates or fellow extra-curricular participants who aren't Greek. Remind them that these are all potential members and could join your chapter next semester or participate in recruitment next fall. Encourage your new members to truly get to know them. I like the 2-1 ratio: if one of your new members thinks a friend would make a great addition to the chapter, have the new member ask her friend to go out to lunch, or coffee, or to a movie. Then have just one other sister go along with them; two sisters to one potential member. It's overwhelming for potential members to meet a chapter all at once. Make the progression slowly (and don't wear letters on your "date"). It should be just one person inviting two people out and introducing them to each other. Then take it from there! |
As to the "I didn't show up" girls, I get it. You did not get who you wanted and it stings. But really, you are already unable to participate in any recruitment for the year (submitting a MRABA after Preference locks you in whether you show up or not, so it does not matter.) There is actually no "I dropped out of ABC on Bid Day and COB-ed XYZ" because that is not a thing. That, and if you were gunning for a chapter that is the Phi Beta Popular on campus, you probably are not getting a bid there if you depledge and wait the year out because they are not taking re-rush sophomores that they declined to bid the year before. Unless they just love love loved you and there was some awful mistake. But usually there wasn't. You may as well give it a shot for a week. And as for the dynamic recruitment side convo: Oh, the "recruiting year round" and dynamic recruitment speech. I worked with collegians for six years in this area. It was particularly a difficult concept for those chapters who usually always met Q or Q+ but recently had total raised after recruitment or for whatever reason, had openings in Spring semester when they usually had none. Double hard if you typically shine in formal recruitment. So often, those chapters would want to make COR into a mini formal recruitment with all of these extra events and I would just be like "You guys, be natural. Be you and work smart, not hard." If you are already ALL going to that Fraternity philanthropy event, you can invite Suzy and Shannon. They need not come to the house for a whole movie night planned just for them. |
Bless your heart, we have all had new members who didn't show up on Bid Day. Please try not to take it personally. Enjoy your new pledge class.
Some of those girls who didn't show might come to realize that they had (as my sister AZTheta says) a Golden Ticket and they rethink their actions. They will find out quickly that they are now without ANY house and won't be able to be considered for membership elsewhere for a full year. Keep your head up and be proud! |
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Thank you all so much for the kind words and helpful advice!
Our chapter has been working hard to plan COB events in the upcoming weeks to recruit new members. We are very satisfied with the quality of the members who have stayed so far. Although we did have another girl drop today, I see it as a blessing in disguise. She made the call that was likely best for her, and now we have left the new members who are excited to be here! Many girls missed the deadline for formal recruitment, so there was high interest in COB to begin with. I hope that our informal will go just as well! |
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In a way, I'm jealous of chapters that have the chance to do COB, exactly because you get to meet women who didn't shine in formal recruitment. We never once were under total, which is obviously a good thing numbers-wise, but meant that the only women who ever joined my chapter were the ones who thrived in the loud, crazy setting of formal recruitment. I think we would have benefitted from the chance to look at women who for whatever reason weren't interested or successful in formal recruitment, but would have still been great chapter members.
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My daughter joined thru COB as well and was absolutely thrilled with the process and just how laid back it all was. It could not have worked out any better for her in the end.
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