GreekChat.com Forums - Recruitment Ramblings: Observations from an 80s Sister

I am a fairly consistent lurker; however, I haven’t posted. I passionately support our bond of sisterhood and am always amazed at the accomplishments of our young collegiate sisters. The recruitment process can be overwhelming, but personally I loved the opportunity to visit each sorority chapter house. Thirty years later it is fun to tell my Panhellenic sisters of my recollections of their “home” at my Midwest campus.
Anyway, I wanted to offer a few observations.
1. The start of recruitment? For legacy daughters—birth. Seriously, introduce them to your sisters. Show them your scrapbooks. Serve as a chapter advisor and have them meet collegiates. For a potential first time Greek daughter? Introduce them to your friends who are Greek. Ask your friends to talk about their experiences.
2. The High School years? Grades are important for college admission and critical for recruitment. When your daughter is in 8th grade look at the GPAs required for recruitment. Discuss this with them. It can serve as a motivator. I would also discuss social media and keeping it “clean”. Drinking under the age is not legal in any state under 21—it shouldn’t be done or attending fraternity parties in high school. Watch The Hunting Ground with your daughters (and sons).
3. Senior year of high school? Find recommendations. Personally, I think the Potential New Member should pursue this task. I also think the PNM should provide secondary information not the mom. I do offer a recommendation to HS seniors. If they are interested, I will also help them find other sorority recommendations. Ask questions about Greek Life to collegiates (before the silent period)—both PNMs and moms.
4. Summer before recruitment. The PNM should keep social media clean and not attend fraternity parties.
5. Recruitment week. Listen to your PNM. If she has decided that she isn’t ready for this step, don’t force her. The sophomores I have written recommendations have been very happy as they felt a decision as a 1st year would not have been positive. Let her call/text you after each round. Honestly, I think it is best to wait until she has her list for the next round. It doesn’t make sense to perseverate on the ones not on the list. I also wouldn’t play the number game as in “How many parties did your roommate/frenemy/etc receive?” Be supportive of your own PNM and don’t make it a competition.
6. Misc. Chapters change, but I truly believe a legacy bond is extremely special. I also find my Panhel sister bonds priceless (both from college and alum days). Encourage your PNM to reach out to her Panhel sisters through other collegiate clubs and for academics. Have your PNM send thank you notes to rec writers or at least a text about the outcome. A couple of my PNMs (now active sorority women) I still keep in touch and will continue to support them with a text during the semester.