Can Men and Women Be Truly Just Friends?

[SummerChild]

Can men and women be truly just friends?

I ask b/c I was reading another thread and it struck me that the few guys who are in my friend circle approached me, I declined and *THEN* we later became friends. Are there any genuinely true male-female friendships out there in which there was never a romantic (or potential romantic) aspect to the relationship?

Is it possible? genetically?

[enigma_AKA]

Originally posted by SummerChild
Can men and women be truly just friends?

I ask b/c I was reading another thread and it struck me that the few guys who are in my friend circle approached me, I declined and *THEN* we later became friends. Are there any genuinely true male-female friendships out there in which there was never a romantic (or potential romantic) aspect to the relationship?

Is it possible? genetically?

LOL @ genetically. You sound like Harry a la 'When Harry met Sally'. ;)

I think so. Maybe it's because I'm younger or because I've gotten wiser, but I have quite a few male friends who were never interests (neither interested in me nor me them). Is there potential? Yes, but I think we have reached the point where it's a true comradery (sp?). I set them up on dates; they hook with up with friends, etc. No drama--at least not yet.

This, however, is not the case with every guy friend I have--sad to say, but true. :( And I'm working on getting it back to a pure platonic relationship. Wish me luck!

enigma_AKA

[jubilance1922]

Men and women can't be friends. The sex part always gets in the way.

Yes, its from "When Harry Met Sally', but in 90% of all cases, its true.

[Dionysus]

I have more guy friends than girl friends. It's been that way for most of my life. Only two of them asked me for some a$$.

[enigma_AKA]

Originally posted by Dionysus
I have more guy friends than girl friends. It's been that way for most of my life. Only two of them asked me for some a$$.

Only two? What's wrong with you? :eek:

Just kidding, seriously. Why more male friends, though, if you don't mind me asking...?

enigma_AKA

[Dionysus]

Originally posted by enigma_AKA
Only two? What's wrong with you? :eek:

Just kidding, seriously. Why more male friends, though, if you don't mind me asking...?

enigma_AKA

I guess it's because, I'm almost always seen as "one of the guys".

Why more male friends? We just seem to bond better. I find it pretty difficult to get close to girls, and to keep close if we do so.

[SKEEphistAKAte]

My answer is No, men and women can't just be friends. At some point during the friendship one of the two will develop romantic/sexual feelings for the other (no matter how fleeting). I think many times the two CHOOSE not to ACT on them, but the feelings are there at some point during the friendship, even if for a short amount of time.

("You" speaking hypothetically) Also, you may not have had feelings for him, and he never told you he had those feelings for you (prolly because you were snoting all over his shoulder about how much you loved Mr. Wrong at the time) but I guarantee you he has had them (ONE of you had them) ;)

[PerfectVerse06]

No ma'am!!

I hate to say it, but I don't think men and women can just be friends.

A guy once told me that there is no such thing as male/female platonic relationships because the guy is just waiting for his chance to get some. Instead of taking the easy approach and just asking a woman out, he plays like he wants to just be pals and THEN, once a friendship is established, he will try make the relationship into something more.

I've experienced this far too many times to know this.

Oh wait, there is an istance where men and women can just be friends...it's when the man is gay!

[Dionysus]

I don't remember befriending any guys who I was repulsed by. I was either attracted to them, or I felt neutral, but never flat out unattracted.

I do agree that there's usually at least a little sexual tension between guy and girl friends, but I don't think we have to LIKE each other.

[Rain Man]

Yes, they can

IF AND ONLY IF the friendship is at arms length. Lemme explain:

If a man and a woman see each other only on occasion and are cautious not to show each other all their business (read: their most personal and intimate parts of their souls), then yes, they can stay friends. But once that line is crossed, a soul tie develops and either one party or the other is going to want more out of the relationship and that is where the trouble comes in. Because men naturally start to develop an "attraction" toward the woman or vice versa.

Two ways to prevent this from happening: one, don't let the other party know all your business. Know what to express to your friend and what to keep to yourself. Two, go out together with a group of mutual friends. That way, the focus is not on the two of you, and there is less pressure and incentive to "bare your souls".

And I speak from years of experience on this one, so trust me.

ETA: A lot of the women I was involved with who wanted to be "just friends" with me were a bunch of spiritual and emotional freeloaders who wanted the security and benefits of being in a relationship without the committment required to maintain one. I do not waste my time with those types. If a woman says, "Let's just be friends", I say, "HECK NAW" and get outta dodge.

They ain't about to cry on my shoulder and keep me awake until 3 and 4 in the morning telling me sob stories about how some thug kicked them to the curb after they got f[rea]ked and chucked by them. As they say, "Save the drama for your mama".

Keep your distance from the opposite sex unless and until the romantic feelings you have are mutual. It saves everyone a whole lotta mess.

[enigma_AKA]

Originally posted by Rain Man


And I speak from years of experience on this one, so trust me.

LOL. Too easy, coming from a man. :D :o

enigma_AKA

[ImSoNUPEY]

I thinK it jus depends on maturity level of the individuals. Some men kan handle it some kan't

[Rain Man]

Originally posted by ImSoNUPEY
I thinK it jus depends on maturity level of the individuals. Some men kan handle it some kan't

I may be reading your post out of context, but it's not so much about maturity as it is about a yearning for affection. We as human beings have a natural desire for affection and for someone of the opposite sex to affirm our worth as a man or woman. To say that some men can handle it and some can't trivializes that very God-given desire. OTOH, if you can't "handle it", keep your opposite sex friends at arms length, and do not invest too much of your soul in your friendship.

Maybe it's just me, but I hate the term "just friends". Every time I see those two words together I read it as "emotional tampon".

But I'm just jaded like that. ;)

[Marie]

I say yes, men and women can be friends.

I think that there are a couple of different types of relationships to consider. First look at men that you have become friends with through your current or ex-boyfriends. I dated one guy for nearly 6 years, and in that time his friends also became mine. I feel very close to some of them (like brothers), and though I'm no longer with that person, they are still in my life as friends. Note: The realtionship btwn my ex and I ended very peacefully, so there are no hard/akward feelings in the group. This may also work for the ex's of your female friends, but I tend not to get that close to any of the men in my friends' lives. Its a bit different b/c guys tend to not hang out w/their girl and her friends as much as women hang out with their guy and his friends.

Also, consider men that you meet that are already involved with someone. I am very good friends with some of my male co-workers. However, most of them are married or engaged, so there is no question on either side of where the boundaries in our relationship lie.

Furthermore, think of men who you simply are not attracted to. There are tons of situations (esp. at work) where there are men who just aren't what you're looking for, and you're not what they're looking for (differernt tastes, different race, different religion, different values, etc). It doesn't necessarily mean that there is no room for a friendship. For instance, one of my friends is a great guy. He's a lot of fun, has a good heart, and isn't that bad to look at. However, he's Indian and practices Hindu, and he's looking for a girl that is the same. While I'm not opposed to dating/marrying outside of my race, I do want a man who is a Christian, so... it's not gonna work. We're very cool, but it's just never going to go down, and we both know this.

Finally, I think that you can be attracted to someone & they be attracted to you, and you just opt to never act on that. Maybe its a friend of your older brother, or a cute guy who's just a little to young, or whatever. Just b/c you like them does not mean that you have no other choice but to act on that feeling, and just b/c you choose not to act on that feeling does not mean that they are automatically banished from your circle. My best friend has been attracted to one of her friends for years. I think maybe he liked her to start, but didn't get up the nerve to approach her. Now they both like each other, but individually don't want their existing friendship to change. He dates other girls, she dates other guys. They talk to one another about their relationships and other aspects of life just the same as if she and I were talking. They both know the situation, and are cool with it as it is.

[SummerChild]

Perfect, don't sleep on women. Pretending to be friends is also one of the ways that many *women* try to get with your man - by pretending that she is trying to be his friend/associate, etc. Many times, she's basically just trying to get close to him so she can become a *apparent* confidante and when you two have an argument, then she seems like she's just a sincere friend when she's like "maybe you two aren't meant for each other." All the while, waiting for her chance.

I have had more than one woman call herself "befriending" my man only to later admit that she was trying to get with him. He now can see these woman more clearly. First, he was taking them at face value. The first one, I suspected right away when she came in town and wanted to meet *me*. Trying to size up what in her twisted mind was the competition. LOL

We just got rid of another one who finally just turned into an all out stalker when she revealed her interest and he let her know it wasn't happening. This stalker has called me at work on occasion, etc. Finally, a police report had to be filed. SMH

So don't sleep on the women.

SC

Originally posted by PerfectVerse06
No ma'am!!

I hate to say it, but I don't think men and women can just be friends.

A guy once told me that there is no such thing as male/female platonic relationships because the guy is just waiting for his chance to get some. Instead of taking the easy approach and just asking a woman out, he plays like he wants to just be pals and THEN, once a friendship is established, he will try make the relationship into something more.

I've experienced this far too many times to know this.

Oh wait, there is an istance where men and women can just be friends...it's when the man is gay!

[lovehaiku84]

I do think that men and women can be just friends, however the following situations will more than likely always occur. 1) Someone becomes attracted, expresses that attraction and gets rejected. Depending on the strength of the friendship, it may or may not end at this point. 2) Both become attracted, and act on that attraction, thereby ruling out the "just friends" part of the relationship 3) Both are attracted, but there are prior committments on one or both ends, which prevent them from acting on the attraction <--- I think that this is an incredibly touchy situation though, especially if one friend is having trouble in their relationship. I think it leaves room for emotional and possible physical affairs to begin. Lastly I think that men and women can be friends in a case where they may have dated and discovered that they were not compatible as a couple, but that a friendship would work out. Depending on how you look at that particular situation these two people are "just friends."

[TonyB06]

I think if two people, especially unattached people, really like each other as friends, at some point someone is likely to develop feelings. That's natural, IMO. Whether you act on the feelings or not is another matter, but I guarantee somebody (usually the dude) is at least thinking about it, and is usually willing to risk the friendship to take it to another level.

If either or both are otherwise involved with other people, then it makes it the "friendship" train roll easier.


*thinking back to the days on the yard when the motto was 'girl, if you want a friend, buy a dog.....' :cool:

[Rain Man]

Originally posted by TonyB06
*thinking back to the days on the yard when the motto was 'girl, if you want a friend, buy a dog.....' :cool:

Ain't that the freakin' truth? :cool:

[Lady of Pearl]

;) It's possible once you have worked through the attraction stage. One friend and I resolved that it was best to lose the relationship but not the friendship and we are still good friends to this day!

[whiteandblack]

in my experience, no.

[Quala67]

My ex-husband and I are great friends, now that we're divorced. We lost the friendship (which we had for 2 years prior to marriage) in trying to make the relationship work. He's still my buddy, and in fact - have vented/cried/babbled to him about guys I've dated since the divorce. I can look him in the eye and tell him I care about him, but wouldn't live with him ever again - and he can do the same. And we mean it!

Now on the flip side of things, the guy I've just started dating is a long-time friend (of 20 years), who admitted to me that he's wanted to date me for about 15 of those 20 years, but either I was in a relationship/marriage, or he was in a relationship. So, I'm hoping this one turns out better than my first marriage!

(btw, lovehaiku, I love the Pat quote on your signature! I'm a HUGE Benatar-fan as well)

[SummerChild]

Hi Quala67,
Not trying to be funny, just curious. Based on your post, it seems like you are a female but the fraternal information indicates "brother." Is that the way that females are referred to in the org or are you a male? Just wondering about the lingo of your org.
SC

Originally posted by Quala67
My ex-husband and I are great friends, now that we're divorced. We lost the friendship (which we had for 2 years prior to marriage) in trying to make the relationship work. He's still my buddy, and in fact - have vented/cried/babbled to him about guys I've dated since the divorce. I can look him in the eye and tell him I care about him, but wouldn't live with him ever again - and he can do the same. And we mean it!

Now on the flip side of things, the guy I've just started dating is a long-time friend (of 20 years), who admitted to me that he's wanted to date me for about 15 of those 20 years, but either I was in a relationship/marriage, or he was in a relationship. So, I'm hoping this one turns out better than my first marriage!

(btw, lovehaiku, I love the Pat quote on your signature! I'm a HUGE Benatar-fan as well)

[Dionysus]

Originally posted by SummerChild
Hi Quala67,
Not trying to be funny, just curious. Based on your post, it seems like you are a female but the fraternal information indicates "brother." Is that the way that females are referred to in the org or are you a male? Just wondering about the lingo of your org.
SC

She's in APO. Guys and girls are called brothers. :)

[Quala67]

Dionysus is correct, in Alpha Phi Omega, all initiated persons are referred to as 'Brothers,' no matter what the gender. I am proudly a female Brother of APO.

Any my ex-husband is also my Brother, and his parents, and my sister....made for very interesting conversations!

[SummerChild]

Oh, ok. That's interesting convention. Thanks for the info. I think that my feminist mind would wonder how come everyone can't be called a sister instead. LOL
SC
Originally posted by Quala67
Dionysus is correct, in Alpha Phi Omega, all initiated persons are referred to as 'Brothers,' no matter what the gender. I am proudly a female Brother of APO.

Any my ex-husband is also my Brother, and his parents, and my sister....made for very interesting conversations!

[Munchkin03]

Some of my closest friends are guys, and I can honestly say with the exception of the two that I've dated, I've not felt any romantic sentiment towards them. They are like brothers. Some are gay. I think it can work.

[Steeltrap]

I think I'm going to see whether this can happen. I don't have many straight male friends right now.

[Marie]

Originally posted by SummerChild
Oh, ok. That's interesting convention. Thanks for the info. I think that my feminist mind would wonder how come everyone can't be called a sister instead. LOL
SC

My business fraternity, Alpha Kappa Psi, is the same way. I'm not sure if everyone is referred to as brother b/c it is a fraternity or b/c it was originally an all male organization. I think that it is the former though.

[AlphaFrog]

Originally posted by SummerChild
Oh, ok. That's interesting convention. Thanks for the info. I think that my feminist mind would wonder how come everyone can't be called a sister instead. LOL
SC

I think I remember reading that APhiO voted to let in female members under the stipulation that they are still brothers. It used to be an all male org.

[Quala67]

*off topic, but figured I'd step back in*

Alpha Phi Omega National Service Fraternity was founded in 1925 as the 'Boy Scout' Fraternity. In fact, until the late 60's, all members also had to be affiliated with the BSA. In December 1976, at our National Convention in Atlanta, GA, women were given full memberships rights. In fact, in our National bylaws it states that all initiated members shall be referred to as Brothers. If you want to know more about APO, check out http://apo.org, or feel free to PM me.

*apologizes for getting folks off topic*

[Strongbeauty]

I have a male friend who I have been friends with for about 3 or 4 years and sex has never come up. I have more male friends but I haven't known them as long so who knows what will come up in the future. One in particular I view more like a little brother so that would be like incest.

I say that to say yes men and women can be just friends. That's like saying that homosexuals can't have friends of the same sex because they are somehow genetically wired to want to jump each others bones.

[AKA_Monet]

Are you looking for a mate or are you looking for a friend?

If you are dating and are looking for a mate, it will be tough to become friends depending on your maturity level.

If you are just looking for friendship in general, I think it will be relatively easy for opposite sexes to be friends no matter what the sexual orientation. Commonalities, general likes and dislikes, whatever, the bonds of friendship are shared when one keeps a perspective on the purpose of this relationship...

Whereas, seeking a mate is different. Eventually, those involved could be friends. However, there are many ways to express one's mating habits. If one is attracted physically and sparks fly whenever they are together, then it will be extremely difficult to build any kind of friendship relationship.

That thing about agape and eros...

At any rate, personally, I do not have very many male friends. Especially now that I am married. And my husband has very few female friends that I know all about. Most of the ones I know about are married with children. Besides if he wanted to get with one of them for whatever reason, he knows he'd be giving up on the best thing that happened to him :p :rolleyes: :D

[MsFoxyLoxy77]

there is a reason why most married couples say their significant other is their BEST FRIEND. Either (a) they started off as friends or (b) their relationship grew to more than just a romantic attraction and they connect on the basis of genuine friendship. I think men and women can be friends. However, I do not think that men and women can just be best friends or even close friends without emotions coming into play.

In fact, if my female friends knew I was writing this right now they would die from laughter. I have a great guy friend whom I confide in as much as a my best friend; in fact, he is my best guy friend. Everyone (and I do mean everyone) including my mother thinks we're secretly dating. It didn't matter how many dates I went on everyone told me we were putting up a front. I used to think everyone had lost they're minds...but a few months ago I realized that it's not everyone else whose crazy...that in between our almost daily conversations there's a lot we don't say to each other.

So...Yes, I think we're both attracted to certain aspects of each other. No, I still have no intention of pursuing a relationship with him...after all he's still one of my best friends and I wouldn't have it any other way. However, if my significant other had a friendship like mine and I didn't think he or the friend could keep the friendship platonic she or he would have to go...that's just how I feel.

[southernelle25]

ETA: A lot of the women I was involved with who wanted to be "just friends" with me were a bunch of spiritual and emotional freeloaders who wanted the security and benefits of being in a relationship without the committment required to maintain one. I do not waste my time with those types. If a woman says, "Let's just be friends", I say, "HECK NAW" and get outta dodge.

They ain't about to cry on my shoulder and keep me awake until 3 and 4 in the morning telling me sob stories about how some thug kicked them to the curb after they got f[rea]ked and chucked by them. As they say, "Save the drama for your mama".

Isn't that what friends do, provide a shoulder for the other to unload all this "drama"? :rolleyes:

[DSTCHAOS]

Yes.....

[DSTCHAOS]

Isn't that what friends do, provide a shoulder for the other to unload all this "drama"? :rolleyes:

I feel what Rain Man is saying. :)

I don't let anyone unload their drama on me. I'll listen to a couple of stories from my real friends but, for the most part, I'm not the one to call if you have constant and ongoing stress in your life. I like to have peace so my small group of friends know that they need to have more good than bad stuff to share with me (on a constant basis) or I will mysteriously be unavailable whenever they call.

[crimsondanger10]

I have two guy friends, one of whom I call my best friend. Both are married with children. Both wives know me, and I have also formed friendships with the wives. We have been friends since high school and I think he (best friend) knows everything about me. I don't THINK either of us have ever thought about "getting with" the other. I have never had problems with any other females, who they formed romantic relationships with, thinking that we would ever "go there."
Of course we get the occasional comments about our friendship, but we both understand "us" and I truly don't think we will ever be anything other than friends.

[thesweetestone]

I feel what Rain Man is saying. :)

I don't let anyone unload their drama on me. I'll listen to a couple of stories from my real friends but, for the most part, I'm not the one to call if you have constant and ongoing stress in your life. I like to have peace so my small group of friends know that they need to have more good than bad stuff to share with me (on a constant basis) or I will mysteriously be unavailable whenever they call.

I agree with with Rain Man and you. Letting others unload all their crap on you will drive you CRAZY.

[PositivelyAKA]

:cool: yes you can be just friends, if neither is attracted to the other. but most of the time somebody wants to be more than just friends and will go along with the "friendship title" until they either get what they want or give up and move from the "friendship

[PrettyBoy]

I don't think men and women can be friends. They can be associates but not friends. Well...maybe in some rare cases, but I've never had that luck. I've tried to be friends with women and they always have wanted more. They'll seem to be friends with me, but as soon as I find interest in another woman as more than friends, they get jealous, and the whole time I'm thinking "Wow, I thought we were just friends.":(

[DSTCHAOS]

I don't think men and women can be friends. They can be associates but not friends. Well...maybe in some rare cases, but I've never had that luck. I've tried to be friends with women and they always have wanted more. They'll seem to be friends with me, but as soon as I find interest in another woman as more than friends, they get jealous, and the whole time I'm thinking "Wow, I thought we were just friends.":(

How did you manage to fit into this thread with such a big head? Just kidding. Trust that you will be able to find (maybe plenty of) women who only want to be platonic with you. If your male ego can stand it. ;) I find that many men's egos can't, so be prepared to receive what you're asking for. ;)

Sidebar: I have male friends who I've had for yeeeeeears and it has remained platonic. This doesn't mean there isn't some attraction with some of them or that they wouldn't try to get down if there was an opportunity. However, those of us who don't feel the need to date or have sex with everything that expresses interest in us are able to keep friendships platonic if we don't want to ruin the genuineness of it.

[PrettyBoy]

How did you manage to fit into this thread with such a big head? Just kidding. Trust that you will be able to find (maybe plenty of) women who only want to be platonic with you. If your male ego can stand it. ;) I find that many men's egos can't, so be prepared to receive what you're asking for. ;)

Sidebar: I have male friends who I've had for yeeeeeears and it has remained platonic. This doesn't mean there isn't some attraction with some of them or that they wouldn't try to get down if there was an opportunity. However, those of us who don't feel the need to date or have sex with everything that expresses interest in us are able to keep friendships platonic if we don't want to ruin the genuineness of it.
Can women and men be friends without any physical attraction at all? I can't see it. Hey, I can't help it that women can't keep their hands off of me. :p

[delph998]

Can women and men be friends without any physical attraction at all? I can't see it. Hey, I can't help it that women can't keep their hands off of me. :p

WOW! :rolleyes: I'd love to see this Pretty Boy! :)

[DSTCHAOS]

Can women and men be friends without any physical attraction at all? I can't see it. Hey, I can't help it that women can't keep their hands off of me. :p

Well, some women are desperate and have low expectations. ;)

But your question is like asking "can human beings walk down a crowded street without finding at least ONE person physically attractive?" Sure, it's possible to NOT but if the other person is physically attractive and you notice that person, you're usually going to find that person physically attractive. Unless you know too much about that person and the thought of physical attractiveness just makes you sick.

But finding someone attractive doesn't mean you'll want to hump that person. I have longterm male friends who find me attractive but have never made a move. They they me that they've said to themselves "oh, that's just DSTChaos...we're like brother and sister" or "we're homies so I wouldn't want to confuse things."

[DSTCHAOS]

WOW! :rolleyes: I'd love to see this Pretty Boy! :)

You ever seen that deformed monster thingie from the Goonies? :p

[southernelle25]

...those of us who don't feel the need to date or have sex with everything that expresses interest in us are able to keep friendships platonic ....

'Xactly. :cool:

[PrettyBoy]

Well, some women are desperate and have low expectations. ;)

But your question is like asking "can human beings walk down a crowded street without finding at least ONE person physically attractive?" Sure, it's possible to NOT but if the other person is physically attractive and you notice that person, you're usually going to find that person physically attractive. Unless you know too much about that person and the thought of physical attractiveness just makes you sick.

But finding someone attractive doesn't mean you'll want to hump that person. I have longterm male friends who find me attractive but have never made a move. They they me that they've said to themselves "oh, that's just DSTChaos...we're like brother and sister" or "we're homies so I wouldn't want to confuse things."
Yeah, I see your point, but they still want you, and given the opportunity they wouldn't turn you away.

[PrettyBoy]

You ever seen that deformed monster thingie from the Goonies? :p
You ain't right.:p

[PrettyBoy]

WOW! :rolleyes: I'd love to see this Pretty Boy! :)
LOL. Seriously, I have never had a female friend that didn't want more from me. I don't know why. Maybe it's my personality.:p I mean, I don't look at myself in the mirror and say "Damn I look good". Women tell me that.;)

[laylo]

They can be acquaintances, but not close friends. They can't hang out alone. I've had several guys get angry at me because I wouldn't hang out with them as "friends". So when I did, I made it very clear beforehand that I wasn't interested in anything romantic or sexual happening in any way. And every single time without exception, they still tried something and I had to leave. Maybe it changes when you get older (I doubt it), but for the most part women think they have male friends, men think they have untapped options. Not saying its only men who play the friend game, but I think men are much more likely to.

[PrettyBoy]

They can be acquaintances, but not close friends. They can't hang out alone. I've had several guys get angry at me because I wouldn't hang out with them as "friends". So when I did, I made it very clear beforehand that I wasn't interested in anything romantic or sexual happening in any way. And every single time without exception, they still tried something and I had to leave. Maybe it changes when you get older (I doubt it), but for the most part women think they have male friends, men think they have untapped options. Not saying its only men who play the friend game, but I think men are much more likely to.

You hit it right on the nose. I wouldn't get serious with a babe who had male friends. It just causes too many problems.

[SexualChocolate]

They can be acquaintances, but not close friends. They can't hang out alone. I've had several guys get angry at me because I wouldn't hang out with them as "friends". So when I did, I made it very clear beforehand that I wasn't interested in anything romantic or sexual happening in any way. And every single time without exception, they still tried something and I had to leave. Maybe it changes when you get older (I doubt it), but for the most part women think they have male friends, men think they have untapped options. Not saying its only men who play the friend game, but I think men are much more likely to.
Yup, I'm guiltly of this kind of behavior.:rolleyes:

[delph998]

LOL. Seriously, I have never had a female friend that didn't want more from me. I don't know why. Maybe it's my personality.:p I mean, I don't look at myself in the mirror and say "Damn I look good". Women tell me that.;)

Okay, Pretty Boy! I guess I believe you.

I think that men and women can truly be just friends; however in most cases, one person likes the other.

[DSTCHAOS]

Yeah, I see your point, but they still want you, and given the opportunity they wouldn't turn you away.

"Want" makes it seem like a persistent longing. Maybe it's just a passing level of attraction. It depends on the people and the level of interaction.

No one is obsessively beautiful and sexually attractive to everyone. ;)

[DSTCHAOS]

You hit it right on the nose. I wouldn't get serious with a babe who had male friends. It just causes too many problems.

Well you will be missing out on a lot of good women then.

But maybe women won't want to be with you because you call them "babe." :eek: ;)

[MsFoxyLoxy77]

I came across this quote and it made me think of this thread:

Definition of "Just Friends": It means I don't just want you to mourn the loss; I want to remind you of it every day. I want you to suffer. I want you to envy. I want you to die slowly, a bit at a time. And I want you to smile and thank me for it.

[delph998]

Well you will be missing out on a lot of good women then.

But maybe women won't want to be with you because you call them "babe." :eek: ;)

I love it! :D

On a serious note, my father tells me all of the time that I have too many male friends and that may prohibit me from being in a relationship. I've cut a lot of these friends down over time.

[DSTCHAOS]

On a serious note, my father tells me all of the time that I have too many male friends and that may prohibit me from being in a relationship. I've cut a lot of these friends down over time.

Only for insecure men unless you are spending way too much time with other men.

I was raised mostly around males and almost all of my life most of my friends have been male. I also have friends who are women, because I don't believe that women are catty or difficult to get along with, but just not as many female friends as I have male friends. I make sure that these male friendships are platonic (even if there WAS some attraction at sometime) and we don't blur the lines in our words and interactions. So there's never a question.

If you cut down on these male friends make that be a choice YOU make because YOU no longer need them in your life. Unless you and your man are going to be picking each other's friends and he's not going to have any female friends. :)

[delph998]

Only for insecure men unless you are spending way too much time with other men.

I was raised mostly around males and almost all of my life most of my friends have been male. I also have friends who are women, because I don't believe that women are catty or difficult to get along with, but just not as many female friends as I have male friends. I make sure that these male friendships are platonic (even if there WAS some attraction at sometime) and we don't blur the lines in our words and interactions. So there's never a question.

If you cut down on these male friends make that be a choice YOU make because YOU no longer need them in your life. Unless you and your man are going to be picking each other's friends and he's not going to have any female friends. :)


Girl, you're speaking that knowledge! This is true. A lot of these friends did/do like me and I don't feel the same way, so I know that I needed to move on with life. But your comments were very accurate. I do have males friends that are permanent male friends...the significant other will have to understand that.

[hellocutie]

A question for everyone in response to this quote.

I do have males friends that are permanent male friends...the significant other will have to understand that.

Do you think that you would change your relationship with your opposite sex friend in anyway while you have a significant other?

[PrettyBoy]

Well you will be missing out on a lot of good women then.

But maybe women won't want to be with you because you call them "babe." :eek: ;)
LOL. I get my share of ladies.

[PrettyBoy]

Okay, Pretty Boy! I guess I believe you.

I think that men and women can truly be just friends; however in most cases, one person likes the other.
delph998 I can't agree with you more. Someone likes someone for more than friends. You are so right.

[PrettyBoy]

I love it! :D

On a serious note, my father tells me all of the time that I have too many male friends and that may prohibit me from being in a relationship. I've cut a lot of these friends down over time.
Good girl, good girl. Keep kuttin' those male friends back.:p

[DSTCHAOS]

LOL. I get my share of ladies.

LOL. :rolleyes: ;)


"All hail, to the King of Hypermasculinity...they all bow down to your prowess."

[delph998]

Good girl, good girl. Keep kuttin' those male friends back.:p

You're something else, PB! :)

[PhrozenGod01]

I'm not sure if it was mentioned earlier in the thread, but the only female friends who are seriously "just friends" are the sisters, cousins, and girlfriends of friends that I already have. And if my friends broke up with their girlfriends that I'm cool with, those females wouldn't be my friends any more. I'd be nice to them, but there wouldn't be much to talk about. It's a simple "man law" *looks at clock, gets more impatient for happy hour*

[ShamikaT]

I DO NOT allow my beaus to have female friends for the reasons mentioned in this thread. If I ever find out, I WILL chop him up and throw him down the garbage disposal! I do not play with that mess.

[DSTCHAOS]

I DO NOT allow my beaus to have female friends for the reasons mentioned in this thread. If I ever find out, I WILL chop him up and throw him down the garbage disposal! I do not play with that mess.

Geesh. Good luck on being able to control which gender a grown ass man's friends are. :rolleyes: He'll still befriend women, he just won't tell YOU about it.

And while he's lying to you about not having platonic friendships with women, he'll just go ahead and cheat on you too since he's getting away with hiding something anyway and will be "chopped up" whether it's platonic or not. :D

[delph998]

I agree with DSTChaos.

You can't control what your significant other is doing when you all are not together. Trust is a huge component of a successful relationship. And if you have those ground rules before you get into the relationship, you may not need to be with him.

[AKA_Monet]

I'm not sure if it was mentioned earlier in the thread, but the only female friends who are seriously "just friends" are the sisters, cousins, and girlfriends of friends that I already have. And if my friends broke up with their girlfriends that I'm cool with, those females wouldn't be my friends any more. I'd be nice to them, but there wouldn't be much to talk about. It's a simple "man law" *looks at clock, gets more impatient for happy hour*

Are you married? Just asking...

























LADIES, THIS MAN IS READDDYYYY!!!!

[AKA_Monet]

I don't think men and women can be friends. They can be associates but not friends. Well...maybe in some rare cases, but I've never had that luck. I've tried to be friends with women and they always have wanted more. They'll seem to be friends with me, but as soon as I find interest in another woman as more than friends, they get jealous, and the whole time I'm thinking "Wow, I thought we were just friends.":(

I'm sorry, but you post that kinna thing, I havta see it to believe it...

You are talkin' good game but are you willin' to put dem "nutz" on the table lak dat dere?

Show me how "pretty" you are? And nunna this stuff where I do it first... 'Cuz folks who are on here know me... And you're single and turning girls on... I'm not.

[PhrozenGod01]

Are you married? Just asking...

























LADIES, THIS MAN IS READDDYYYY!!!!

I'm way too young to be married. Maybe not too young, but way too immature. Maybe in a few years, when I've worked longer and act more responsible.

[AKA_Monet]

I'm way too young to be married. Maybe not too young, but way too immature. Maybe in a few years, when I've worked longer and act more responsible.

Yeah... Whatever... ;)

Homegirl plays her cards right with you, you'd go down on bended knee... :)

[DSTCHAOS]

I'm way too young to be married. Maybe not too young, but way too immature.


I figured you were too young and most men don't get mature enough until they are in their mid-20s to 30s. :D

I respect anyone who can admit to needing more life experiences before making a life commitment like that. ;)

[PhrozenGod01]

Yeah... Whatever... ;)

Homegirl plays her cards right with you, you'd go down on bended knee... :)

If by playing her cards right, you mean she bought me an XBox 360, I'd think about it. I am so kidding. She'd have to buy me some games too. :cool:



I figured you were too young and most men don't get mature enough until they are in their mid-20s to 30s. :D

I respect anyone who can admit to needing more life experiences before making a life commitment like that. ;)


I don't know. I can be in a mature relationship, but marriage is probably less about love and more about business in my eyes. When I listen to people much older than me, and seemingly much more thorough, vent about marriage/family issues, I can only nod my head and pretend to understand.

[AKA_Monet]

If by playing her cards right, you mean she bought me an XBox 360, I'd think about it. I am so kidding. She'd have to buy me some games too. :cool:

I don't know. I can be in a mature relationship, but marriage is probably less about love and more about business in my eyes. When I listen to people much older than me, and seemingly much more thorough, vent about marriage/family issues, I can only nod my head and pretend to understand.

1) Plenty of women I know work for Microsoft and can hook you up on their discount for the XBox... ;)

2) Just for your own knowledge, you need to know about the "reality" of marriage by reading books about. Most folks don't know about being married until they are. But that doesn't mean you should go in clueless.

Besides, the way I intepret DSTChaos' comment was that you ought to have lived a little in your life, whatever that may be... If you haven't had those experiences you think you need to have, then you will be stringing along another person in your life always in a "search", sometimes for something better... It's about being indecisive.

Being married myself, there are time that I am quite immature with my husband. But I regroup and rebuild. To me, IMO, that is how love builds on a relationship. If you love each other, then you can always build. But you havta know how to love each other.

[DSTCHAOS]

I don't know. I can be in a mature relationship, but marriage is probably less about love and more about business in my eyes. When I listen to people much older than me, and seemingly much more thorough, vent about marriage/family issues, I can only nod my head and pretend to understand.


Hopefully a healthy balance of the two. :)

[PrettyBoy]

I DO NOT allow my beaus to have female friends for the reasons mentioned in this thread. If I ever find out, I WILL chop him up and throw him down the garbage disposal! I do not play with that mess.
Whooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Go ahead girl!!!!!:p

[PrettyBoy]

I'm sorry, but you post that kinna thing, I havta see it to believe it...

You are talkin' good game but are you willin' to put dem "nutz" on the table lak dat dere?

Show me how "pretty" you are? And nunna this stuff where I do it first... 'Cuz folks who are on here know me... And you're single and turning girls on... I'm not.
LOL. O.K. AKA_Monet. Here's the deal. I'm not saying I'm a pretty boy. I'm just saying what women have always told me. It goes all the way back to the 1st time I went to a Kappa interest meeting. On that day most of the frats had their interest meetings at the same time, so when everyone left the interest meetings, women would be outside to see who was coming out, and they would say to me "Oh we know what you're pledging. Pretty Boy!" After the interest meeting even the Nupes made comments about me as I was leaving. I've been told this so often that I just said hey, why not go with the flow. Now as far as my picture is concerned, I wouldn't put it on the net especially directed toward a married woman. I'm single because I don't hang out. I study and work too much. When would I have time to meet a nice young lady?

[delph998]

I study and work too much. When would I have time to meet a nice young lady?


WOW! You had me until you said this...:rolleyes:

I like giving you a hard time. :D

[DSTCHAOS]

LOL. O.K. AKA_Monet. Here's the deal. I'm not saying I'm a pretty boy. I'm just saying what women have always told me. It goes all the way back to the 1st time I went to a Kappa interest meeting. On that day most of the frats had their interest meetings at the same time, so when everyone left the interest meetings, women would be outside to see who was coming out, and they would say to me "Oh we know what you're pledging. Pretty Boy!" After the interest meeting even the Nupes made comments about me as I was leaving. I've been told this so often that I just said hey, why not go with the flow. Now as far as my picture is concerned, I wouldn't put it on the net especially directed toward a married woman. I'm single because I don't hang out. I study and work too much. When would I have time to meet a nice young lady?


Guffaw! :rolleyes: :p :cool:

[DSTCHAOS]

I like giving you a hard time. :D


He doesn't make it hard to.

[PrettyBoy]

LOL. DSTCHAOS and delph998 you two are somethin' else. ;) I really do have a busy schedule.

[RedAngel]

I think men and women can be truly just friends.
I have a few male friends that are just that.

[AKA_Monet]

LOL. O.K. AKA_Monet. Here's the deal. I'm not saying I'm a pretty boy. I'm just saying what women have always told me. It goes all the way back to the 1st time I went to a Kappa interest meeting. On that day most of the frats had their interest meetings at the same time, so when everyone left the interest meetings, women would be outside to see who was coming out, and they would say to me "Oh we know what you're pledging. Pretty Boy!" After the interest meeting even the Nupes made comments about me as I was leaving. I've been told this so often that I just said hey, why not go with the flow. Now as far as my picture is concerned, I wouldn't put it on the net especially directed toward a married woman. I'm single because I don't hang out. I study and work too much. When would I have time to meet a nice young lady?

There is always room to meet someone when you want to... ;)

And... What do you "study" and "work" too much (at/for)?

Your little comments... You ain't gonna meet "nice young ladies"... That will be a little tough for you... ;)

[delph998]

I think men and women can be truly just friends.
I have a few male friends that are just that.

Question: On both ends is there absolutely no chemistry? I'm just curious; not doubting what you say. :)

[BellaSF]

I believe that men and women can be friends in certain circumstances. After great thought about this subject I realized that I dated most of my male friends. In fact, last year I was dating a friend and he told me that he had feelings for another female which also happened to be a friend. We vowed to remain friends. And we have...but we still go on dates, flirt and all that stuff. We just don't admit that we have feelings for one another.

[PrettyBoy]

There is always room to meet someone when you want to... ;)

And... What do you "study" and "work" too much (at/for)?

Your little comments... You ain't gonna meet "nice young ladies"... That will be a little tough for you... ;)
I'm in school for industrial design. I work midnights so I can go to class during the day. The little time I have left (when I'm not in Bible study) I sleep. I never have time to meet nice women.

[DSTCHAOS]

I'm in school for industrial design. I work midnights so I can go to class during the day. The little time I have left (when I'm not in Bible study) I sleep. I never have time to meet nice women.

You better be lucky you're a Kappa and your name is PrettyBoy. When I read this post an image of a recluse(sp) like Norman Bates popped in my head.

[PrettyBoy]

You better be lucky you're a Kappa and your name is PrettyBoy. When I read this post an image of a recluse(sp) like Norman Bates popped in my head.
You lost me with this post.:confused:

[DSTCHAOS]

You lost me with this post.:confused:

The idea of you working all the time, only taking a break to go to Bible study and sleep, and not having time to meet nice women. Makes you sound like a loner with a hairy back. Maybe even a man who wears women's underwear and dances around his bedroom.

But we all know that a Kappa named PrettyBoy couldn't be a loner with a hairy back who wears women's underwear.......I guess.

[PrettyBoy]

The idea of you working all the time, only taking a break to go to Bible study and sleep, and not having time to meet nice women. Makes you sound like a loner with a hairy back. Maybe even a man who wears women's underwear and dances around his bedroom.

But we all know that a Kappa named PrettyBoy couldn't be a loner with a hairy back who wears women's underwear.......I guess.

LMAO:D . No, I don't have a hairy back and I don't dance around in my bedroom with womens underwear on. I'm hardly ever at home to do any dancing in my bedroom at all.:) When I do get a little time, occasionally I do twirl my kane in my bedroom though.:p

[DSTCHAOS]

When I do get a little time, occasionally I do twirl my kane in my bedroom though.:p


:(:(
:( :(

[PrettyBoy]

:(:(
:( :(
:o Sometimes I get bored. Gotta keep my kane skills though.:)

[delph998]

:o Sometimes I get bored. Gotta keep my kane skills though.:)


WOW.

[PrettyBoy]

WOW.
Do you ladies want to see a clip of me twirling my kane?

[DSTCHAOS]

Do you ladies want to see a clip of me twirling my kane?

No.................

[neosoul]

are you twirling your kane or jerking your mutton? all this sexual innnuendo is making my head hurt...

[DSTCHAOS]

are you twirling your kane or jerking your mutton? all this sexual innnuendo is making my head hurt...

I really tried to pretend it was all very literal. LOL.

[Dionysus]

My head is in the gutter and I usually pick up on SI "like that" *snaps*. I had no idea he was talking about having sessions alone. I was like why would he practice twirling his cane in his bedroom. He could break something. :o He would have better luck twirling his cane out in the front yard. :p

[DSTCHAOS]

My head is in the gutter and I usually pick up on SI "like that" *snaps*. I had no idea he was talking about having sessions alone. I was like why would he practice twirling his cane in his bedroom. He could break something. :o He would have better luck twirling his cane out in the front yard. :p

I think he was really and literally talking about twirling his cane. Kappas practice dropping their canes in all sorts of places. :)

If he was talking about a different kind of twirling, I don't believe he would admit to solo twirling.

[AKA_Monet]

I'm in school for industrial design. I work midnights so I can go to class during the day. The little time I have left (when I'm not in Bible study) I sleep. I never have time to meet nice women.

Like my Ph.D. professor said: "Sleep?!? Sleep?!? You can sleep when your dead!!!"

I know it can be done, but how do you even have the focus to goto school, work until midnight to go to class during the day? And still have the GPA to graduate? Just asking?

Oh, so now you're being the "church marm"... Telling us you found "Jesus" but say you "give your cane a twirl"... O.K.

I see why you fail to meet NICE women... ;)

[PrettyBoy]

All this because I like twirling my kane? LOL. It just hit me how that sounded when I asked if you ladies wanted to see me twirl my kane. LOL. That's not what I meant. But that tells me where your minds are. DSTCHAOS is the only one who's mind seems to be clean. That's pretty gross. I was just kidding about the video clip. I would never put my picture on the net.:p .

[PrettyBoy]

Like my Ph.D. professor said: "Sleep?!? Sleep?!? You can sleep when your dead!!!"

I know it can be done, but how do you even have the focus to goto school, work until midnight to go to class during the day? And still have the GPA to graduate? Just asking?

Oh, so now you're being the "church marm"... Telling us you found "Jesus" but say you "give your cane a twirl"... O.K.

I see why you fail to meet NICE women... ;)
I already have a college degree, so I'm just focused on building a great portfolio. I work two jobs to pay for it. I don't like taking out loans. What's wrong with twirling my kane? I can still go to church and occasionally do that when I'm bored:p .

I meet nice women all the time, but I'm not physically attracted to most of the ones I meet. That's the way I should have put it. I do have a friend who's also on greekchat. She's the one who told me told me about this site.

[PrettyBoy]

are you twirling your kane or jerking your mutton? all this sexual innnuendo is making my head hurt...
You've got issues. How do you get sex out of twirling a kane? :confused:

[Dionysus]

A cane is long and hard and able to manipulate.

A penis can be long and hard and able to manipulate. :o

You also said you did this in your bedroom.

[PrettyBoy]

A cane is long and hard and able to manipulate.

A penis can be long and hard and able to manipulate. :o

You also said you did this in your bedroom.
My stereo is in my bedroom. Again...not what I meant. But I see where your mind is. :o

[AKA_Monet]

I already have a college degree, so I'm just focused on building a great portfolio. I work two jobs to pay for it. I don't like taking out loans. What's wrong with twirling my kane? I can still go to church and occasionally do that when I'm bored:p .

I meet nice women all the time, but I'm not physically attracted to the ones I meet. That's the way I should have put it. I do have a friend who's also on greekchat. She's the one who told me told me about this site.

Sweetie, a note of caution, there are plenty of women here that have flying hormones... Spell that as "biological clock" or "time bombs"...

I am sorry, but what you are saying is rather seductive to women whose minds tend to wander...

Don't be angry by it, just be amused or amazed by it...

You may be one of the few men that can hold a decent conversation, be interested in women and have a lot going for himself.

And you can "twirl a kane in your bedroom"...

Now, even an old married lady like me has to admit that is quite enticing...

As far as nice ladies, I am sure you meet them. And I can imagine why you have not met one that physically attracts you... Your interest my not be trying to find an inner core that is the definition of plenty of women's attractiveness and physicality. Unless your recruitment is that jacked up...

If you get to know some of these nice women, believe me, there will be more that you are capable of doing besides "twirling a kane in the bedroom"... ;)

[PrettyBoy]

Sweetie, a note of caution, there are plenty of women here that have flying hormones... Spell that as "biological clock" or "time bombs"...

I am sorry, but what you are saying is rather seductive to women whose minds tend to wander...

Don't be angry by it, just be amused or amazed by it...

You may be one of the few men that can hold a decent conversation, be interested in women and have a lot going for himself.

And you can "twirl a kane in your bedroom"...

Now, even an old married lady like me has to admit that is quite enticing...

As far as nice ladies, I am sure you meet them. And I can imagine why you have not met one that physically attracts you... Your interest my not be trying to find an inner core that is the definition of plenty of women's attractiveness and physicality. Unless your recruitment is that jacked up...

If you get to know some of these nice women, believe me, there will be more that you are capable of doing besides "twirling a kane in the bedroom"... ;)
I'm not angry. It is rather amusing, silly but amusing. But that's the way it is. A lot of women think like this now a days. I like inner and outer beauty. I'd rather be alone than to be with a woman I'm not physically attracted to. But the ones that I have met are good friends and I do know these women. As far as kane twirling, it's just fun to me.

[AKA_Monet]

I'm not angry. It is rather amusing, silly but amusing. But that's the way it is. A lot of women think like this now a days. I like inner and outer beauty. I'd rather be alone than to be with a woman I'm not physically attracted to. But the ones that I have met are good friends and I do know these women. As far as kane twirling, it's just fun to me.

My issue is physical attraction can mean different things to different people... Beauty is in the Eye of the Beholder...

Meaning what one finds attractive in one person is unattractive in another...

And like I was brought up to believe, "pretty is as pretty does"...

For instance, you may find some supermodel extremely attractive, but is a mindless brain fart tard.

But a girl you would fail to give the time of day is extremely intelligent, with some clean up, she could be an extremely attractive catch...

I find that many ladies would discount themselves from relationships may have negative attitudes about relational approaches. They blow it with unattractive conversation or aggressiveness in other ways.

So, it really depends on what are you attracted to...

Is your physical attraction purely a body one? Or a stereotypical male image of what a woman ought to look like?

Just asking.

[PrettyBoy]

My issue is physical attraction can mean different things to different people... Beauty is in the Eye of the Beholder...

Meaning what one finds attractive in one person is unattractive in another...

And like I was brought up to believe, "pretty is as pretty does"...

For instance, you may find some supermodel extremely attractive, but is a mindless brain fart tard.

But a girl you would fail to give the time of day is extremely intelligent, with some clean up, she could be an extremely attractive catch...

I find that many ladies would discount themselves from relationships may have negative attitudes about relational approaches. They blow it with unattractive conversation or aggressiveness in other ways.

So, it really depends on what are you attracted to...

Is your physical attraction purely a body one? Or a stereotypical male image of what a woman ought to look like?

Just asking.
AKA_Monet you make some great points. I see you have a clean mind, I can have an intelligent conversation with you, unlike some of the ladies on GC...if you know what I mean. "The whole kane thing.:rolleyes: " But anyway, I agree with you when you say there are some attractive women that are very shallow, and there are some that are very intelligent that are not so attractive, but could use a little fixing up, but I wouldn't want to be with either one of them. I would rather be by myself, though I would never throw away a friend, no matter what she looked like.

I'm attracted to a lot of things in women. My ideal mate is very difficult to find, though I'm sure there are some out there. I'm interested in women that are not only attractive to me, but have different hobbies, can talk about world events and current world issues. Not saying she has to know everything that goes on in the world, b/c I don't know everything, but I have to be able to have a conversation with her about some of the issues. The whole body thing? I have my preferences, just like any other man, but for the most part my ideal mate is very, very different from what I've been exposed to. Times have changed, but some women have not, they're just really hard to find, not that I'm looking, I just haven't run into the woman that I would be compatible with.

[DSTCHAOS]

PrettyBoy, stop following the white rabbit down the hole. ;) How did this become PrettyBoy's PsychoAnalytical thread?

[delph998]

How did I miss all of this?! LOL!

[PrettyBoy]

PrettyBoy, stop following the white rabbit down the hole. ;) How did this become PrettyBoy's PsychoAnalytical thread?
LMAO. You are too funny.:p

[squirrely girl]

i'd have to go with a no on this concept - if only from personal experience guy friends (who aren't gay) generally turn into one of the two people wanting some.

and if you started as a fling and the sex was good - you're screwed out of having a true friendship afterwards because at least one of those people is going to want some more.

[PrettyBoy]

i'd have to go with a no on this concept - if only from personal experience guy friends (who aren't gay) generally turn into one of the two people wanting some.

and if you started as a fling and the sex was good - you're screwed out of having a true friendship afterwards because at least one of those people is going to want some more.
I can't agree with you more:p . I think it also causes problems in relationships. Like if I was with a girl who had several male friends or if I had several female friends, while involved in a serious relationship. That to me just causes so many problems.

[teena]

I'm attracted to a lot of things in women. My ideal mate is very difficult to find, though I'm sure there are some out there. I'm interested in women that are not only attractive to me, but have different hobbies, can talk about world events and current world issues. Not saying she has to know everything that goes on in the world, b/c I don't know everything, but I have to be able to have a conversation with her about some of the issues. The whole body thing? I have my preferences, just like any other man, but for the most part my ideal mate is very, very different from what I've been exposed to. Times have changed, but some women have not, they're just really hard to find, not that I'm looking, I just haven't run into the woman that I would be compatible with.

I have found that when men say that they are unable to find what they are looking for in a woman- they have been the first ones to knock over good women to get to sleezy gold diggers. I hope that doesnt describe you.

Back on topic, i think that men and women can be friends- but it is very rare.

[DSTCHAOS]

I have found that when men say that they are unable to find what they are looking for in a woman- they have been the first ones to knock over good women to get to sleezy gold diggers. I hope that doesnt describe you.

Back on topic, i think that men and women can be friends- but it is very rare.

Same applies to women who claim there aren't any good men.

There are plenty of good men out here but unless you're a good woman the two of you will keep evading each other.

[PrettyBoy]

I have found that when men say that they are unable to find what they are looking for in a woman- they have been the first ones to knock over good women to get to sleezy gold diggers. I hope that doesnt describe you.

Back on topic, i think that men and women can be friends- but it is very rare.
I'm not sure. It could. I have had nice women approach me, but I wasn't physically attracted to them. The women that I have been in serious relationships with were a little too fast for me. My X was a gold digger. I learned the hard way with that one. Now I look at family background. That's priority number one. If her family background is similar to mine, and I find her physically attractive with a good head on her shoulders, then I could see getting involved with a woman like that. The women that I've been involved with and the ones that I keep running into have family backgrounds that are opposite of mine. With that I know I'm not compatible with women like that.

[PrettyBoy]

Same applies to women who claim there aren't any good men.

There are plenty of good men out here but unless you're a good woman the two of you will keep evading each other.

I agree with you all the way.