AI Journey

[branramb]

I am excited to being my AI journey. In college, I pledged a sorority but had to leave for personal reasons. For several years, I tried to reestablish contact and join through their AI program. I talked with an area alum who is bringing me up at there meeting next week. Unfortunately, one of the members I had a run in with a year after I left over money. I regret the incident and I am afraid that this will be held against me. What do you guys think?

Anyway, I am so excited and I have regretted not following through with initation like my advisor recommended.

[Jill1228]

Woo hoo! Another AI story to follow! Good luck hon!

How bad was the falling out/run in? Is she an active member of the Alum association?

[branramb]

It was bad and yes she is an active member of the alum association. However the situation was miscommunication caused by a third person so I hope she doesn't blackball me since I only need one other signature before it goes to the collegiate chapter.

This sorority requires 2 signatures and a vote from the collegiates so hopefully my contact can connect me with 2 alum rather than her.

[lauralaylin]

Do you mean a vote from the alums in the alumnae chapter rather than a vote from the collegiates?

Good luck with your journey!

[LouisaMay]

branramb...I'm so excited for you! You will feel great when you can erase this regret from your mind.

I certainly hope that the disgruntled member doesn't get in your way. Remember, time usually heals all wounds, so hopefully she's over it! If the rest of the group loves you, I don't think one person will keep you out.

Lots of luck!!
LM

[branramb]

The collegiate chapter votes to initiate me after 2 alum have recommended me. Then I can join any alum group but I would join the one who recommended me. I hope she doesnt hurt my chances because I want this so badly. I went through rush and actually dropped out. They extended a bid to me anyway thanks to the wonderful friends I made that week and I went through everything I had to was even a pan delegate, but i didnt initiate.

[branramb]

I talked with the collegiate president and she seemed willing to help. So I will check back with you on Tues.

[Tom Earp]

Think this will be an interesting Thread to watch!:)

Unless GC is totally screwed up, why 4 posts only! Just a question about that! Not saying GC is unfaliable, but just wondering?

I would like more info if you can put on site!:D

A lot of Great People here to aid you on a quest! But does sound a little thin!:)

Needs a fill in !

[rainbowbrightCS]

oh, this is exciting.

Maybe you should let the other alum know that you are ready and willing. That you have your act togther (and money)


I wish you luck.

[branramb]

Thank you! I supplied the alum with my resume and interest in wanting to help both the collegiate and alum chapter. I would also like to work with a neighboring school to promote the sorority. I really wanna make up for the 4 years I missed out on, but I dont wanna sound too desperate. I just really cherish this opportunity.

[bsp-mich24]

Good Luck in your AI search.:)

[branramb]

I talked with my contact earlier and she is suppose to get back with me this afternoon when she gets off work. She spoke with the Alumni group last night so I will see what they said. I'll post again later today.

[pinkyphimu]

oh i can't wait to hear how it went!

[branramb]

Sry but I will have to wait until later tomorrow to update you all. She was very busy and didnt have a chance to write me back. She said she had a detailed letter to send so I dont know if that is bad or what.

[LouisaMay]

Now, now...you have to be positive! A detailed letter could be a very good thing. Plus, do you know that she meant a detailed letter to YOU, or did she mean that she couldn't get back to you because she was busy with a detailed letter? Either way, I don't see any need to worry yet.

:)

{{Hugs}}

LM

[branramb]

The detailed letter was to me, but she didnt have a chance to write it because she was busy with clients all day.

[branramb]

No word yet. She said first thing this morning but I guess she hasnt had a chance to reply. It's driving me crazy I want to know so bad.

[branramb]

Well guys I have given up hope. I am sure she would have replied by now if there were really interested. I guess the letter she was developing is a nice rejection letter. I guess she is trying to come up with the words to let me down gently. Well, good luck to all you other AIs I hope your journey is more successful.

[Jill1228]

Hey chill! It ain't over yet!
Sure she said first thing this morning but ya know things get in the way: work, kids, other stuff...LIFE! Ya know bosses think their employees have to work ;)

I know how hard it is to wait (trust me, my sponsor prolly wanted to strangle me at times).

Don't expect the worst. The detailed letter could mean anything. Usually if it is a detailed letter it is not a kick to the curb letter...

Also wait until she contacts you. Do NOT badger her with "how come you haven't given me that detailed letter". It will turn people off and make you look desperate.


Good luck

[PhiPsiRuss]

Originally posted by Jill1228
Hey chill! It ain't over yet!
Sure she said first thing this morning but ya know things get in the way: work, kids, other stuff...LIFE! Ya know bosses think their employees have to work ;)

I know how hard it is to wait (trust me, my sponsor prolly wanted to strangle me at times).

Don't expect the worst. The detailed letter could mean anything. Usually if it is a detailed letter it is not a kick to the curb letter...

Also wait until she contacts you. Do NOT badger her with "how come you haven't given me that detailed letter". It will turn people off and make you look desperate.


Good luck
What Jill said. Rejection letters are usually no longer than a paragraph. I've never heard of a detailed rejection letter, unless it was a generic form letter.

Forget about it for a week. Something could have popped up in her life.

[navane]

branramb,


Woah, woah, woah! :cool:


Don't give up just yet!


If I had a dollar for every time someone said to me "I'll have that e-mail/report/item for you first thing in the morning", I'd be richer than Bill Gates!! :) As Jill pointed out, people have work, family and other committments which get in the way. I know I personally have some 100+ e-mails in my inbox that require my attention and/or personal response. :eek: I mean, you yourself said that she explained she was "...busy with clients all day".


It just sounds to me like you are so hopeful for this opportunity that you just want to know if you have a chance or not. There is nothing wrong with that! But, it also sounds to me like you're afraid for the worst. So, you're looking for any little clue which might lead to that big let down. That way you can say that you "saw it coming" and therefore it won't hurt as much. How does that sound to you?


Don't give up! <hugs> If there is one piece of advice that I always give other PNAMs is that you will probably have to do a LOT of waiting! Waiting for someone to reply to an e-mail, waiting for someone to call you, waiting for an appropriate event that you can be invited to, waiting for the alumnae to have their meeting, waiting for the decision process and so on.


I hope that you will receive the answers you are hoping for....soon! :)


Best wishes from a fellow PNAM,

.....Kelly :)

[LouisaMay]

I happen to have received several rejections recently....

Something like....

Thank you for your interest in _________________. We regret to inform you that we are not able to offer you a place in our program. We have received hundreds of impressive applications this year. Unfortunately, we are unable to accept many highly qualified individuals. Best of luck in your future pursuits.

Blah, blah, blah.

Never detailed.

[Tom Earp]

Steady one and all! It is spring and the fancy turns to other things!

As navan said, stear the course, stay with it!

As tinydancer, who said, she is almost my maturity, found a Home so can there be hope!

There are some Sororities out there who are much more attuned to A I than some. Dont hide the light under a basket, let it shine! Keep trying.:)

[Jen]

There are some of us here who have been pursuing AI for over a year. At times we've all waited for emails or communications with the group or groups we've contacted, sometimes waiting for months on end for something to happen. I definitely would not give up right now!! Your journey seems like it's progressing very quickly, so keep your chin up!

[tinydancer]

Keep a good thought - I did a LOT of waiting, like almost 2 years. Sometimes it just takes time for everything to work out. There were times when I thought it would never happen for me, but I just held on, waited, attended all the things I could, and look at me now! I'll be initiated next week!! It took me 30 years (:eek: ) to finally find a home. It's a dream come true for me.

So buck up!! It ain't over till it's over - and I don't think you are out of the running at all!

Lizz

[branramb]

I have been working on this since the summer of 2001. I finally made a contact that I thought would help. I just wished she woulda said if they were interested that we were in the right direction or things dont look good. That group doesnt vote the collegiates do. I guess if they say no I can always try and relocate my big sis and fellow pledges to see if they would sponsor me.

[navane]

Originally posted by branramb
I have been working on this since the summer of 2001.


branramb,

Guess what? You're not alone! I definitely feel you on this one. I started my AI journey in November 2000 (or spring 1997 if you want to count the time when I got a bid as an undergrad) and I'm still trying some three years later!

I agree with you that it would certainly be helpful if someone could at least let you know if you are even in the running! Waiting for that response is probably just so nervewracking! That's as icky as my situation which was people telling me that they were definitely interested in me yet not taking any action for forever and a day. :mad: Let's just say that waiting in general is no fun. :)

Again, I'm really hoping that you receive an answer very soon!

PNAM,

.....Kelly :)

[branramb]

Another thing that hurts is that everytime I get introduced to the collegiate president the other end takes awhile so I have to start all over introducing myselfs. When I first started, many of the collegiates were pledges when I was a pledge. Now I dont know any of the undergrads.

[branramb]

Got a letter from her saying she was very busy and would get back with me later this weekend.

[bsp-mich24]

Branramb,

I know this easier said than done, but just "hang in there" b/c you never know when that door to AI will open. Like Kelly said, " you're not alone." Although I only have been at this process since May '03, I too have had my ups and downs over along the way as well as others pursuing AI; so I feel for ya.;)

Keeping fingers crossed for you.:D

[branramb]

I just wish she woulda hinted if it were positive or negative letter.

[Jill1228]

As many folx have said here...no one gets kicked to the curb in a "detailed" letter. It is pretty much, "thanks but no thanks, see ya and don't let the door hit you where the Good Lord splitcha"

So I got my money on the detailed letter not being bad

[Tom Earp]

JillyBean, Sweety, That is why I love you! You are the most upbeat crazy Coaster I know!:cool:


Who Loves Ya Baby!;)

[The B Girl]

Branramb-

I can empathize with you in the waiting a LONG time to get something that you want... I am trying to make a job change at work (within the same company) to a position that I really want to do again (I used to do this at a previous company). I have now waited 3 years to get this job change, and I am still waiting. I have been very vocal about my desire and have gone through the proper PC channels and talked to the right people, unfortunately, there are factors that are completely out of my control and I am aware of those.... I have been told that the job change will come in due time and that I am very qualified for the position but BOY DO I HATE WAITING (I'm a type A person!!) All I can say is.... please don't give up. I haven't yet been told that I WON'T get the job, just like you haven't been told that you WON'T get into your organization, and I think that if it was not going to work out, they would let you know by now. Hopefully I have helped you out some...

Jennifer

[branramb]

That is a very good point! I dont know one way or another. Its been a week I just wish she woulda said I have a shot or you are wasting your time.

[The B Girl]

Think about the good things that you have gained from re-establishing contact with this organization. I'm sure that by now you have acquainted (or re-acquainted) with many of the members and have formed lasting friendships. I have moved around a lot in my career and have learned that you can never have enough friends in this world...... Even if by some strange whim of a chance things DON"T work out, which I doubt will happen, you still have the new friends that you have made.

[MelodyCat]

Keep your chin up - detailed letters are not a bad sign. :)

Sometimes unexpected things get in the way - but I think things are still on the right track. Like my Syracuse Triad sis Lizz said, sometimes it takes time.

I hope good news comes in the mail soon!

[Jill1228]

It's been a week?! Hell, some of the girls have been pursuing AI for months or YEARS! Consider yourself lucky

Originally posted by branramb
That is a very good point! I dont know one way or another. Its been a week I just wish she woulda said I have a shot or you are wasting your time.

[branramb]

It's been a week since they met to discuss my situation. It's been since May of 2001 since I started this, almost 3 years.

[LouisaMay]

{{{{HUGS}}}} to you.
I know your frustration. It's so hard to be on the waiting end. I thought my AI search was coming to a lovely end back in October, and now I'm not so sure where things are going. We all understand. We're just searching for the right thing to say to keep you encouraged.

LM

[Tom Earp]

Never can seem like a long time!:(

Some get lucky and get on a fast track while others wait and wait but dont give up!:D

Do right place and right time sound familiar?:confused:

Hope is like the Sun, it comes up in the East everyday! I Hope!:D

Never give up the hope for tomarrow can be a Brighter Day!:)

[Jill1228]

Ooops, I stand corrected! My bad!

Nevertheless, hang in there

Originally posted by branramb
It's been a week since they met to discuss my situation. It's been since May of 2001 since I started this, almost 3 years.

[branramb]

Friday she sent an email saying she email me during the weekend or first thing this week. If I dont hear anything tomorrow, should I email her and ask if she could at least tell me if its positive or negative?

[AOIIalum]

If you didn't reply when you got the email last Friday then it probably wouldn't hurt to go on and reply now. Something along the lines of thanking her for the update and that you're looking forward to talking with her again soon would be appropriate without being appearing pushy.

If you did already reply, it may be best to wait it out. Real life can sometimes interfere with sorority plans. Hopefully you'll hear back from her sooner rather than later. Waiting is hard, but very important in the AI process.

Patience is always a virtue :), no matter how hard it is! Good luck.

[tinydancer]

I know it is really hard to be patient when it is something important to you, as this is. Please keep a good thought and don't give up! We are all with ya in this!!

[branramb]

It's been almost a week and a half and no word yet.

[branramb]

Its been a week since she said she would get back to me in a day or two. I so bad want to email her and just ask 'how are things going?' is that bad. Or what if I put: "I know I haven't been emailing much but I wanted to let you know that I am still interested in the AI process." What do you thinK?

[The B Girl]

I think you should send a follow-up e-mail. Just think, if this was a situation where you were looking for a new job (instead of a fraternal organization), a potential employer would be impressed to see your enthusiasm and willingness to keep the ball rolling. (I hope I said that right!)

Jennifer

[ms_gwyn]

branramb,

i can also relate to the waiting game, my story is in two threads, so if you want to get technical, i've been waiting to join a GLO since 1991. But I've really gone full force with this thing for only a few months, I had a very hot lead back in 1998 but there was just no connection with the person that I was talking to and I stopped cold until Jan.

Present day, things for me are in a postive direction and i have some hurdles to cross, unfortnately those are not in my hands and the wait is nearly killing me. I'm so close that I can feel it.

Just keep positive and every once in a while, just put in an email asking how things are going.

I'm sure everything will be good and you'll find your home, who knows you may already have one and just not know it yet?;)

[LouisaMay]

I think it is time to follow up. Be brief and positive!

I just sent a "request for an update" myself. Hopefully we will both see some forward motion soon.

LM

[branramb]

I just sent a quick email which acknowledged her busy schedule, but that I wanted to check on how the process was going and if it was positive or negative. I thanked her for her time and that was it. 3 sentences. I will post when i hear something.

[branramb]

I got an email from her saying everything was very positive. They had one lady immediately offer to sponsor me and they have invited me to their April meeting. She said that all the ladies are looking forward to meeting me and since they don't initiate in the Spring there is no rush.

I am soooooooo excited. So if all goes well maybe this Fall will be my time.

[bsp-mich24]

It sounds like things are starting to pick up for you--Good luck and have fun at the spring meeting.:)

[navane]

First your tune was:

Originally posted by branramb
Well guys I have given up hope. I am sure she would have replied by now if there were really interested. I guess the letter she was developing is a nice rejection letter. I guess she is trying to come up with the words to let me down gently. Well, good luck to all you other AIs I hope your journey is more successful.


And now it's:

Originally posted by branramb
I got an email from her saying everything was very positive. They had one lady immediately offer to sponsor me and they have invited me to their April meeting. She said that all the ladies are looking forward to meeting me and since they don't initiate in the Spring there is no rush.

I am soooooooo excited. So if all goes well maybe this Fall will be my time.


See? What did we tell you? :p

There is always hope! Yes, it can get very discouraging at times, but there is always hope! :)

I am so glad your efforts are moving in the right direction! April is only a few weeks away! :)


PNAM,

.....Kelly :)

[Tom Earp]

Well, I guess everyone said it all!:D

There have been those who have tried and waited much longer, so in esenece you could be figured on a fast trak!;)

So, I guess, the only thing I can Say Is Yea!:cool:

Kelly come to KC and Have a Scotch Egg and Watneys with me!:)

Still got the Post Card and look at it off and on! Member!:)

[PhiPsiRuss]

It sounds like, unless you get busted robbing a liquor store, you're in.

[LouisaMay]

Oh!! I'm so happy for you! Congrats on getting wonderful news. I hope my e-mail has the same good results:)

LM

[Sister Havana]

Yay! That is wonderful news! :) Definitely keep us posted!

[tinydancer]

Now THAT'S more like it!! Good luck - April is just around the corner!

[The B Girl]

Yea!!! That is wonderful that everything has worked out for you. Enjoy the April meeting, and enjoy getting to know your sponsor.

[branramb]

Thanks everyone for the support. I know I have had better luck than most but its still hard having to wait. I wanna help with recruitment in the fall. Guess I'll have to wait a year.

[ms_gwyn]

see thinking positive will have positive results.

be sure to keep us updated.

you are an inspiration to me.

[Jill1228]

I helped with recruitment in the fall. I also attended Founder's Day. All of this was BEFORE initiation

Originally posted by branramb
Thanks everyone for the support. I know I have had better luck than most but its still hard having to wait. I wanna help with recruitment in the fall. Guess I'll have to wait a year.

[branramb]

I think I may have blew it. I inquired to Nationals about their convention and they repsonded by emailing my contact and it made it sound like I was trying to go around her. But I really wasn't I was just trying to learn more about the organization without bugging her. But now I feel bad. Should I email her and explain things?

[aopirose]

HAVE PATIENCE! HAVE PATIENCE! HAVE PATIENCE! I know that you are eager but, you need to relax. Although it will be hard, you have to for your own sake. Your contact and/or prospective organization will let you know things when the time is right. There is no harm in wanting to know about convention. They are exciting and tons of fun. However, if the information is not published publicly then it is not something for non-members to know. I would also refrain from contacting the national office. Only correspond with your contact. If she doesn’t respond to you for six weeks or more then contact HQ. I know that in AOII we have very strict procedures for AI. If one step is taken out of turn, the results can be disastrous - no invitation to join.

[bsp-mich24]

I would wait 7-10 days to see if your AI contact, contacts you before sending an email etc. Plus ditto what aopirose said about patience and such....

Depending on the GLO, there may be a link for public info about the upcoming convention (i.e.dates, approx cost excluding airfare & location)

[LouisaMay]

Just be honest with your contact. Tell her that you were curious about convention but you didn't want to bother her. Give it a couple of days, but clarifying things on your own is a good way to prevent hard feelings.

LM

[branramb]

I decided to not email at all and just wait it out. Hopefully she will understand. However, I have been officially invited to the next meeting. I am really excited about meeting everyone.

[Tom Earp]

Actually a good call! Dont Press it!:)

Just take it as it comes, you are just a Cog In The Machine! Dont take that as Harsh, but it does take time for the wheels and gears to move and mesh!:D

AI is so not overnight, just look at some AI's who have been working for a lot longer!:(

Oh, There is Nothing wrong with these ladies as they they are fantastic!:cool:

[branramb]

Woohoo! Less than one week away until I meet the alum group. I am so excited but NERVOUSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

[The B Girl]

I'm so excited for you - please let us know how it turns out - I'm sure you will have a great time.

[tinydancer]

Don't be nervous (easier said than done, I know.) It's going to be fun. Can't wait to hear all about it! This time last year, I was about to go to my first Gamma Phi event and I sure remember how excited I was.:)

[bsp-mich24]

Have fun.:)

[branramb]

What is appropriate dress for an alumnae meeting? I was going to wear a cute top and jeans, but that may not be the right thing to wear. Any ideas?

[Taualumna]

Safest thing is business casual, I'd think.

[SmartBlondeGPhB]

What's the event?

Even when I was President I went casual to everything except Founders Day.

[branramb]

They are having their monthly meeting at a mexican restaurant. I sent a quick email to my contact to ask what the appropriate dress is. Hopefully she won't mind.

[branramb]

I just got back from the alum meeting. It was awesome!!! The ladies were so nice and several ladies were excited that I was 'joining the group'. Anyway, I have been invited back for next months activities. :)

[ms_gwyn]

branramb,

thats wonderful. Its exciting isn't it. To know that you may be this much closer to your goal and to find a home?

I truly hope everything works out for the best.


ms. gwyn

[Sister Havana]

Sounds terrific! :)

[bsp-mich24]

Sounds good.:D

[branramb]

Tomorrow is the next meeting and I cant go because I have to work. This really stinks b/c the next one isnt until August.

[mshoole]

Its okay, August will be here shortly. Sorry you cant go. I know the feeling of wanting to go and just cant making it.

MS

[navane]

Aww, that's too bad. :( The good news is that August isn't too far away!


.....Kelly :)