Rush - What to NOT do or say

[AlphaFrog]

I'm pretty sure there's at least one, if not several NPCs that require married women to take alum status. In that case, that NPC would need to know, because it would be against their bylaws to bid a married woman.

Other then that, I can't really see it being THAT much different then rushing with a finace or steady bf, since many people are doing the live-in thing, and all.

[adpiucf]

Our Alumnae Panhellenic does a roundtable event locally with high school seniors in the winter to help them prepare for recruitment, and LSU is one of the schools we focus on. We invite reps from their Panhellenic, alumnae, etc., to come and speak about LSU recruitment. (as well as UT, A&M, SMU, Bama, Auburn, UGA, etc.-- the schools our local girls most often end up attending and rushing at...)

I'll be frank, and if you don't like this advice, you can certainly do what you wish. If you are at LSU or an LSU-type school, and you are not a freshman from a traditional background of having been to high school and being unmarried and having at least 2 alumnae recs per chapter, a stellar GPA and stellar activities, don't go through LSU recruitment. It's a very traditional competitive Greek System. If you do go through recruitment, do the informal recruitment events. Still, given your background, you may not feel like you fit in with the women in the chapters and I would suggest you try a non-NPC greek organization instead, perhaps a co-ed one, or even a community service group. There's nothing wrong with your background or the LSU sororities; but there are some key differences between you where you and they might be a better fit elsewhere. I'm not saying you wouldn't be a great member or a great fit; but based on your posts and what you have said about your background, that is just my honest take. Even coming from the most traditional background and having all of those traditional attributes and great grades/activities isn't a guarantee of getting a bid as a freshman, and those chances diminish even further the older you are/further along you are in college (a sophomore with a traditional background, great grades and who is head of the Orientation Team/Dance Marathon even will have a very hard time). I wish you the best no matter what you decide!

[VeniceIsSinking]

I guess I should contact someone at my school's greek office and find out the rules for the sorority chapters on campus regarding marriage.

My school is nothing like LSU. Things are a lot cooler here, imo.

I guess once I find out the rules for my campus chapters, and if things seem ok, I will work on getting recs and maintain what I already have going for me. Hopefully my personality, goals, accomplishments etc along with a few recs will be enough to garner a bid. I just really don't want to spend $40 on rush if I'm not going to get a bid because I will be a sophmore during '07 fall rush. I have a lot of undergrad ahead of me (double minor) so I will be here for awhile...

btw, thanks once again ladies for your input/advice... keep it comin' :p

[_Lisa_]

I know that Sigma Kappa does not have restrictions on accepting married women, but it does give them the option of becoming an early alumna.

[Drolefille]

I know that Sigma Kappa does not have restrictions on accepting married women, but it does give them the option of becoming an early alumna.
That matches my knowledge.

[Tippiechick]

I guess I should contact someone at my school's greek office and find out the rules for the sorority chapters on campus regarding marriage.
btw, thanks once again ladies for your input/advice... keep it comin' :p

I don't know how things will turn out for you. But, if you really want to rush, give it a try as long as you are aware that you are facing an uphill battle. It won't be easy.

Please edit your last post. It took most of us two seconds to know where you are rushing.

[KSUViolet06]

I know what school this is. It's not LSU by any means, but the majority of the girls who rush there are still traditional students. As with most things, you never know until you try, but the odds are definitely against you.

[33girl]

I don't know how things will turn out for you. But, if you really want to rush, give it a try as long as you are aware that you are facing an uphill battle. It won't be easy.

Please edit your last post. It took most of us two seconds to know where you are rushing.

I think it's too late at this point.

[VeniceIsSinking]

Sorry, my hands couldn't keep up with my thoughts. Should be clearer now...

Ah, I guess I will just absolutely have ask some questions and try to get a feel for it. If it looks like I have a decent shot, then I will go for it. Maybe knowing quite a few girls in each house will make a difference since they could speak on my behalf behind closed doors. Of course I wouldn't ask them to do so, but they are good friends and I know if they felt I would be a great addition to the sorority; they would help me out by taking focus away from my non-traditional status and put more emphasis on my positive qualities.

Man, this makes me hate work even more for not letting me off of work during '06 rush! :mad:

[adpiucf]

Hopefully my personality, goals, accomplishments etc along with a few recs will be enough to garner a bid. I just really don't want to spend $40 on rush if I'm not going to get a bid because I will be a sophmore during '07 fall rush. I have a lot of undergrad ahead of me (double minor) so I will be here for awhile...

btw, thanks once again ladies for your input/advice... keep it comin' :p

4 sororities would be a little less competitive. I do agree that you should talk to the office of Greek Life. They can't tell you your "chances," but you can ask how many sophomores, etc., were placed, out of those rushing.

Also, not to be nitpicky, but if you are hesitant to spend $40 on an activity now, have you budgeted to anticipate sorority dues? Your first semester is typically the most costly due to one time new member fees and purchasing a sorority badge, etc. Make sure you can assume the responsibilities of time and money if you are going to commit to this.

Also remember that in addition to grades and activities, your reputation is paramount. If you are on campus now, make sure to mind your attitudes toward others. Sororities respect individuality, but more importantly, you as a potential member must respect social conformity-- following membership decisions and such. There isn't a stereotype, but there is an culture to maintain-- the same as you would in the workplace. Call it image/reputation, but fitting in is key with any peer group. Don't change who you are to join, but reconsider joining if you feel any drastic changes would be required. I'm not trying to discourage your goals, but to be realistic. Definitely call the office of Greek Life and if you truly want to join a sorority through formal recruitment, a $40 investment with potential results that may not be to your liking should not be the deterrent.

[VeniceIsSinking]

Oh, I know dues will be expensive. My parents have already said they would help out because they know it will be a great experience for me. The time commitment is something I'm welcoming. I could really use a break from the constant studying, I just don't have enough distractions yet to do that! ;)

I'm a friendly and outgoing person to begin with. I always smile and say hi to random people. I don't walk around with a big green mohawk or wearing anything outrageous in general. So overall I think my presence on campus has been a confident and good one. Also, I definitely would never ever change myself to belong to a sorority. While having that membership would be something to be proud of and something to be actively involved in, I wouldn't compromise myself or my beliefs to attain it.

Thanks for your input adpicuf, I will definitely chose my words wisely when I speak to someone at the Greek office and definitely use that as my basis of how to continue.

[AOII_LB93]

I just really don't want to spend $40 on rush if I'm not going to get a bid because I will be a sophmore during '07 fall rush.

I think above all else this bothers me...there is no guarantee that anyone will get a bid no matter how fabulous they are during recruitment, no matter what school they are at. Even if you weren't married, it might be a "waste" of $40, because you might not get a bid. Lots of fantastic people go bidless every year. It's not like Panhellenic refunds the money of all women who go through recruitment and don't get bids, or at least I've never heard of that being done. That's part of the risk involved with recruitment. Recruitment is not a guarantee. It might be the best $40 you've ever spent, or it could be a total "waste" if you don't get a bid.

Being as how I don't know you, your school, or the organizations on your campus, they may very well be cool with you or your non-trad. status, but they may not be. Before you do anything else, maybe you should contact the greek life office about the being married aspect and if recruitment is a possibility after that time, see if there are informal events you can attend this spring to get to know the organizations better.

[VeniceIsSinking]

I think above all else this bothers me...there is no guarantee that anyone will get a bid no matter how fabulous they are during recruitment, no matter what school they are at. Even if you weren't married, it might be a "waste" of $40, because you might not get a bid. Lots of fantastic people go bidless every year. It's not like Panhellenic refunds the money of all women who go through recruitment and don't get bids, or at least I've never heard of that being done. That's part of the risk involved with recruitment. Recruitment is not a guarantee. It might be the best $40 you've ever spent, or it could be a total "waste" if you don't get a bid.

Being as how I don't know you, your school, or the organizations on your campus, they may very well be cool with you or your non-trad. status, but they may not be. Before you do anything else, maybe you should contact the greek life office about the being married aspect and if recruitment is a possibility after that time, see if there are informal events you can attend this spring to get to know the organizations better.

I'm sorry, I think you may have misunderstood that. I suppose I should have worded it better. Anyway, I don't mind dropping the money and not getting a bid because things wouldnt work out. If for some reason I got the impression I didn't get a bid because of what class I'm in, I would be rather disappointed. Hence the feeling of "wasting" money.

Thanks for your advice though.

[33girl]

No NPC has rules against extending a bid solely because of class status. Any NPC group can pledge a second semester senior if they like.

However, some NPC groups DO have rules against married students being active members. It may not have a thing to do with whether the women in the chapter like you - it's a national rule that the chapter members must follow - the same as the rules regarding grades. Contact the Panhellenic at your school, explain your situation, say you would like to know if any of the groups have national or local bylaws regarding married women being active members, and then go from there.

[Nicole AΦ]

We follow the rule of the three B's Boys, Booze and Bank Accounts as the thinks not to talk about.

[VeniceIsSinking]

Well I got around to contacting my greek office and it looks like my marital status/class ranking will have no negative affect on me. All of the chapters on campus allow married women to be active members and there are no local by-laws regarding married women as well. Also a lot of sophmores participate and are placed! The Greek advisor is really excited about having me go through recruitment and plans on helping me out. :D :D :D :D :D :D

Thanks for the heads up ladies, I appreciate it. I'm just glad that in the end it worked out in my favor.

[AChiOhSnap]

Well I got around to contacting my greek office and it looks like my marital status/class ranking will have no negative affect on me. All of the chapters on campus allow married women to be active members and there are no local by-laws regarding married women as well. Also a lot of sophmores participate and are placed! The Greek advisor is really excited about having me go through recruitment and plans on helping me out. :D :D :D :D :D :D

Thanks for the heads up ladies, I appreciate it. I'm just glad that in the end it worked out in my favor.

I'm glad to hear that the greek life office was so helpful for you! Just to remind you though (since you said you wanted to be fully prepared) that just because a chapter's policies don't disallow a married woman to join a chapter does not mean that her marital status won't have a negative affect on a married PNM's chances depending on the campus culture -- we can't really say for sure that it's not going to negatively affect you. That said, I really hope it doesn't, especially since you're so enthusiastic about recruitment! :D Check through some of the previous "married PNM" threads to read some stories about similar situations worked out.

I'm really glad that lots of sophomores get placed because class standing is usually a big factor in whether or not PNMs get placed at very traditional schools. It sounds like all systems are go for you at this point, and please keep us updated in the fall when you're going through recruitment.

[VeniceIsSinking]

Thanks AChiOhSnap. The advisor was incredibly helpful and is also helping me get more involved on campus to increase my chances for a successful recruitment. She really wants things to work out for me, so she's "grooming" me into not only a better person, but a better future sister. Her advice has been wonderful and she's really making me feel like I am accomplishing something at my school. :)

And you're absolutely right, while the laws say it's ok.. some girls may see it otherwise. I guess my goal during recuritment will be to make it very clear to every sister I encounter that my marital status is just an extension of me, and will not affect my commitment to XYZ sorority. I will obviously not make that the basis of my conversations, but make it a key point! I'll see what I can dig up on the board about married PNM's.

I will definitely create a rush thread in the recruitment stories board when the time comes. ;)

[MTUDeepher]

Like from above, don't talk about boys, beer/being smashed, drugs (I've seen a PNM do this, it was a huge turn off), money, politics, sex, or religion. I like to think that conversations at rush should almost like the conversation you would have at a business lunch/dinner. Concentrate on the good things in your life. i.e: If you visit the humane society to give some kitties some good old fashion loving, or your work as a big sister in big brother/big sister, these kinds of things will let membership know more of your moral standings than your party habits.

[LaurynZTA]

we dont talk about boyfriends alot, but theres sometime you dont have anything else to talk to the girl about. when i went through, i remember i was worried because my bf wasnt going to school with me so i asked one of the sisters if it was difficult with her bf and she told me sometimes but now always, and that really helped me alot.

but we do try to focus only on zta and not our personal lives, but if girls ask and its approapriate, we do answer them.

ALSO

My Rho Betas always told the PMNs, "if you left the __ house after a rush party and realized you left your purse inside, who you be embarrassed to walk back inside to get it?"
Also another good one is, "If you're in the middle of recruitment and you start your period, would you be scared to ask one of the girls for a tampon?"

They seem like silly questions, but during rush there were the houses I just didnt click with the girls and I would have been terrified to ask for a tampon or to go back and get my purse. But at the ZTA house, it was just a match. I felt at home there and it was like instant BFFs.

Maybe that might help if you have a girl torn between 2 houses or if youre a Rho Beta.
\^^^/
ZETA TAU ALPHA
Theta Eta Chapter - SFASU

[amiki246]

Hi. I read all the post on recruitment advice and what not to say. I rushed a sorority and I rushed more than once and I did not do a thing that would fall under the category of "don't say this or don't ask that" and I still did not get a bid. I am a nice and friendly person and I tried to get around and speak to all the girls. I remember one girl even asked me if I would ever want to live in the house or be on their executive board and that was only my second night there. Where did I go wrong? What could I have done differently. Not getting a bid made me really upset and I have gotten over it, but there are still days when I see girls wearing letters and I say to myself "what is wrong with me? how come I did not get a bid?"

And this is kind of a different subject, when rush was over, some of the girls I spoke to and that were nice to me, will either not even look at me or give me a "haha you did not get a bid" or a "I am better than you" look. Why is this?

[OTW]

Hi. I read all the post on recruitment advice and what not to say. I rushed a sorority and I rushed more than once and I did not do a thing that would fall under the category of "don't say this or don't ask that" and I still did not get a bid. I am a nice and friendly person and I tried to get around and speak to all the girls. I remember one girl even asked me if I would ever want to live in the house or be on their executive board and that was only my second night there. Where did I go wrong? What could I have done differently. Not getting a bid made me really upset and I have gotten over it, but there are still days when I see girls wearing letters and I say to myself "what is wrong with me? how come I did not get a bid?"

And this is kind of a different subject, when rush was over, some of the girls I spoke to and that were nice to me, will either not even look at me or give me a "haha you did not get a bid" or a "I am better than you" look. Why is this?

Unfortunately, no one here will be able to give you the answers you seek because we weren't the ones who rushed you.

Did you go through NPC rush? I find it weird that someone would ask you such questions during rush.

At the same time, the reasons why someone was cut/did not receive a bid are not disclosed to non-members as the membership selection process is private.

The things listed here are not the be-all, end-all of recruitment. Just because a PNM follows the advice here it won't guarantee her a bid.

[KSUViolet06]

Hi. I read all the post on recruitment advice and what not to say. I rushed a sorority and I rushed more than once and I did not do a thing that would fall under the category of "don't say this or don't ask that" and I still did not get a bid. I am a nice and friendly person and I tried to get around and speak to all the girls. I remember one girl even asked me if I would ever want to live in the house or be on their executive board and that was only my second night there. Where did I go wrong? What could I have done differently. Not getting a bid made me really upset and I have gotten over it, but there are still days when I see girls wearing letters and I say to myself "what is wrong with me? how come I did not get a bid?"

Not that this makes it any easier to handle, but honestly, not getting a bid to sorority does not mean that something is "wrong with you." You are not less of a person or somehow flawed because of it.

It's best not to worry yourself thinking about why you weren't extended a bid. Membership decisions are private so, you'll never know why. All you can do is speculate, and that will just make you upset when you start thinking of possible reasons.





And this is kind of a different subject, when rush was over, some of the girls I spoke to and that were nice to me, will either not even look at me or give me a "haha you did not get a bid" or a "I am better than you" look. Why is this?

I'm willing to bet that most of them don't think less of you for not receiving a bid. If they do give you dirty looks, that's just being immature. Girls can be immature sometimes.

[Mapple]

I am going through recruitment in the fall as a sophomore & I have a few concerns.

I rushed last year but was cut by round 3 from the sororities that I felt a connection with. I went to prefs to give the two I had left a chance, but I knew they weren't for me. I dropped the day before bid day. What do I say about this experience during this year's rush?

Is wearing the same outfit for both days of round 1 or 2, even though you go to different houses, a faux pas?

Kind of weird question, but what are everyone's thoughts on perfume? I feel like I read somewhere not to wear it for rush, but that sounds off to me...

Thanks :)

[howtheSunrose]

I'm sure this has been said many times but....

please please don't post what GLO you want to join on the internet. And definitely not on facebook. I came across a Global group (I imagine the students thought current students wouldn't see it..or were just not thinking in general) on facebook for my college's upcoming freshman class. In a thread, entitled "Rush", girls were proclaiming which sorority they were "rushing" and saying things such as, "I'm going to join the sorority that drinks the most". While I'm all for giving people a chance, I'm going to have to remember these names. Also, it's probably not the wisest idea to be writing words such as "s**t", "b*tch", and "wh**e" all over people's facebook walls but hey, that's just my personal view point.:p

[violetpretty]

I am going through recruitment in the fall as a sophomore & I have a few concerns.

I rushed last year but was cut by round 3 from the sororities that I felt a connection with. I went to prefs to give the two I had left a chance, but I knew they weren't for me. I dropped the day before bid day. What do I say about this experience during this year's rush?

Is wearing the same outfit for both days of round 1 or 2, even though you go to different houses, a faux pas?

Kind of weird question, but what are everyone's thoughts on perfume? I feel like I read somewhere not to wear it for rush, but that sounds off to me...

Thanks :)

It depends on the campus culture. At some schools, chapters may not bat an eye on a sophomore going through again, but at others, you will be one of a few sophomores going through. If asked, I think you can politely say that you just didn't find your home. I doubt an active would grill you about it much longer than that.

As for wearing the same outfit for both days of a round, while it's true that you won't be seeing the same chapters on each day, your outfit might smell. I mean, assuming your recruitment is in August or September, it will probably be hot or at least warm, so I of course am not implying that you're a smelly person, but when it's hot, people sweat.

I'd say use perfume sparingly. It depends how strong it is. You definitely don't want a chapter to remember you as the girl who smelled like perfume from 10 feet away, or still smell your perfume when you leave a room. Maybe use a body splash instead if you're concerned about it coming off too strong.

[AlphaFrog]

I'm sure this has been said many times but....

please please don't post what GLO you want to join on the internet. And definitely not on facebook. I came across a Global group (I imagine the students thought current students wouldn't see it..or were just not thinking in general) on facebook for my college's upcoming freshman class. In a thread, entitled "Rush", girls were proclaiming which sorority they were "rushing" and saying things such as, "I'm going to join the sorority that drinks the most". While I'm all for giving people a chance, I'm going to have to remember these names. Also, it's probably not the wisest idea to be writing words such as "slut", "bitch", and "whore" all over people's facebook walls but hey, that's just my personal view point.:p

Ahhh...Fraternal Darwinism....

[DDlegacy]

Cell phones are the worst!!!

I had a girl who came in late on the first day (the Rho Chi's decided to let her in to the party) and was sat down with me and the PNM I was talking to, and then she asked if she could use the phone, and was on the phone for the remainder of my time. I didn't get to know anything about her, other than she wasn't prompt or polite.
Needless to say, I made sure she wasn't invited back.
The parties aren't that long, so use your phone in between!!!
You don't see the sorority ladies on their phones--ours are usually locked away for the entire day.

[KSUViolet06]

During recruitment, DON'T ASK the following questions:

**How do you decide who gets a bid?"

**"Am I going to get a bid?"

**"Is my friend _______ going to get a bid?"

**"Why wasn't my friend ______ invited back this round?"

**"How close am I to getting a bid?"

REASON:

The member selection process of every Panhellenic sorority is private, meaning it cannot be discussed with PNM's during recruitment. As much as you might want to know one of the above, sorority members can't discuss that info with you. So it's best not to ask.

[AChiOhSnap]

During recruitment, DON'T ASK the following questions:

**How do you decide who gets a bid?"

REASON: The member selection process of every Panhellenic sorority is private, meaning it cannot be discussed with PNM's during recruitment. As much as you might want to know one of the above, sorority members can't discuss that info with you. So it's best not to ask.



Very true.

While sorority members are generally coached to answer these types of questions, it really only puts us in a bad position to have to give you some canned answer...

"How do you decide who gets a bid?"
"Well, we really can't tell you our process, since membership selection is private, but we look for women who are the best fit for our sorority."

Obviously, those answers aren't really what the PNMs are looking for, but that's all we can say. As best as we're coached, these questions just are awkward any way you look at it.

Other questions to avoid (these are all from personal recruitment experience, and all have which been awkward for me to answer because of the "gray area" of MS involved in the response)

- "What made you decide to invite me back tonight over all the other PNMs?"
- "So are you voting on us tonight?"
- "Will xxxxx (some event that happened during recruitment) hurt my chances at joining your sorority?"
- "I'm a legacy, does that mean I have a better chance at getting in?"

Anything that even remotely involves "your chances" at joining the sorority in question should be really off limits. We're not trying to be rude or evasive in our non-answers, we just really don't want to be the cause of a huge recruitment infraction for our sorority!

[Axid angel]

Cell phones are the worst!!!

I had a girl who came in late on the first day (the Rho Chi's decided to let her in to the party) and was sat down with me and the PNM I was talking to, and then she asked if she could use the phone, and was on the phone for the remainder of my time. I didn't get to know anything about her, other than she wasn't prompt or polite.
Needless to say, I made sure she wasn't invited back.
The parties aren't that long, so use your phone in between!!!
You don't see the sorority ladies on their phones--ours are usually locked away for the entire day.

i was alway told no cell phones no matter what! the pnms weren't even allowed to bring their purses in. that gir was really rude though, your chapter did right not to invite her back. was she given a bid by any other chapter? you don't have to say which one.

[Axid angel]

i just thought of another don't. don't wear the same set of clothes two days in a row. not just for appearences, but because recruitment is usually at the tail end of summer and people tend to sweat. you would think this is obvious information, but i have a friend who does this all the time and it is really gross!

[MaggieXi]

My biggest petpeeve - during recruitment and later in life in the work place --- DON'T WEAR TOO MUCH PURFUME! A lot of people, like myself, have allergies and can be sensitive to perfumes. A little is fine, but if you wear too much -- or don't know if you are wearing too much you run the risk of offending people's olfactory sense and may send some of us running for the tissues.

[SWTXBelle]

I hope you weren't rushing during the heady days of "Giorgio" - what was it with that perfume? Everyone who wore it, it seems, wore buckets of it!

[alum]

I have to agree with the ban on perfume. Neither actives nor PNMs should wear it. There is nothing I hate worse than passing through the cosmetics department at a department store where all the scents from the different companies are merging into a horrendous odor that gives me a headache. And I am not even allergic to the stuff....

[alrphimu]

No perfume...I know it's been said, but it's something that's harped in to us as actives.

Oh, and don't smash a water cup against your forehead and scream that you love a chapter.

it's happened, trust me.

[Axid angel]

My biggest petpeeve - during recruitment and later in life in the work place --- DON'T WEAR TOO MUCH PURFUME! A lot of people, like myself, have allergies and can be sensitive to perfumes. A little is fine, but if you wear too much -- or don't know if you are wearing too much you run the risk of offending people's olfactory sense and may send some of us running for the tissues.

i have the same problem!

[Xidelt]

Oh, and don't smash a water cup against your forehead and scream that you love a chapter.

it's happened, trust me.

Oh. Now I know why I didn't receive a bid from your chapter. :(

[KSUViolet06]

Don't automatically rule out a chapter just because of its size.

At most schools, chapter size changes every year. For example, the sorority that was the smallest my freshman year, is one of the largest now.

[Ocalagirl]

I have to agree with the ban on perfume. Neither actives nor PNMs should wear it. There is nothing I hate worse than passing through the cosmetics department at a department store where all the scents from the different companies are merging into a horrendous odor that gives me a headache. And I am not even allergic to the stuff....

But what happens when Rho Gammas/Pi Chis/Recruitment Counselors give out perfume during rounds? Mine last year offered full out perfume(don't remember what kind) to all the girls in my group. I wore body splash from bath and body in vanilla and only reapplied once in a 7 hour day. I am not sure there needs to be a ban on it, but don't overdo it. Everyone should know how much is too much.

[VandalSquirrel]

But what happens when Rho Gammas/Pi Chis/Recruitment Counselors give out perfume during rounds? Mine last year offered full out perfume(don't remember what kind) to all the girls in my group. I wore body splash from bath and body in vanilla and only reapplied once in a 7 hour day. I am not sure there needs to be a ban on it, but don't overdo it. Everyone should know how much is too much.

My main issue is one of allergies. I personally have a very strong sense of smell, and often too much perfume causes me to have sneezing fits. I know I am not the only one with this issue. I also think offering perfume is a bit odd, not every perfume smells good on or to everyone. I know there are some that smell like fritos and stanky fratbasement on me, but on someone else it would smell awesome. I think patchouli smells like moldy bread, and I don't think a PNM would want to be known as the girl who smells like mold.

I just don't think recruitment is a good place for a lot of scents, especially if it is August, 98 degrees, 99% humidity, there are 100 people in a room and no AC.

[Ocalagirl]

My main issue is one of allergies. I personally have a very strong sense of smell, and often too much perfume causes me to have sneezing fits. I know I am not the only one with this issue. I also think offering perfume is a bit odd, not every perfume smells good on or to everyone. I know there are some that smell like fritos and stanky fratbasement on me, but on someone else it would smell awesome. I think patchouli smells like moldy bread, and I don't think a PNM would want to be known as the girl who smells like mold.

I just don't think recruitment is a good place for a lot of scents, especially if it is August, 98 degrees, 99% humidity, there are 100 people in a room and no AC.

I wasn't disagreeing with you my any means and I hope it didn't come out like that. I use to work at a makeup counter at the end of the day my allergies were flaired and I smelled like a french whore. I am just sayin' this is what happened to me last year.

[33girl]

I would literally feel naked and very insecure if I weren't wearing some sort of fragrance, especially in a situation as high pressure as rush. That being said, you shouldn't be wearing the same scent in the middle of the day in August that you would to a party on a December night - rush or not.

[MerryGPhiB]

I too wish I had known all of this well, more than 20 years ago. Here is an additional suggestion of what not to ask. How do you compare yourself to XYZ sorority? It sets the PNM up in a potentially negative light and could be reworded as , How does your sorority do in comparison on campus/panhellenically regarding grades ( or whatever topic)?Be more specific with the question about that house vs another. When a PNM asks better questions they will normally get better answers and it will show an organization you are interested in them.

Heres a few more
How do you select your members? What is your selection process? My friend said that because I had mutiple recommendations, that means I get in, right?, Since my grandma, and mom and sister are all XYZ you have to take me, dont you?

[Shommy]

this might be a stupid question but, when we are rushing and are at the chapter houses, should we eat if they have food out?

[adpiucf]

Accept the food and drink if offered to you. You don't have to actually eat/drink it if you don't want to.

Something to keep in mind: some houses won't offer water, only soda. Soda can leave a bad taste in your mouth, especially when it is hot outside. So stash a bag of breathmints with your belongings (your recruitment counselor will keep an eye on your things when you are in a recruitment event).

[MerryGPhiB]

this might be a stupid question but, when we are rushing and are at the chapter houses, should we eat if they have food out?


Be who you are, if you're hungry eat (okay don't eat everything they put out.) I do agree about the sodas, they may make you more thirsty or the sweet along with the heat can cause a headache. If you've had cookies and punch at three houses in a row, be polite say no thank you.

Frankly, use the food as an opening to ask a house what types of food or meals do they have on meeting night? (if you're at a school which has meetings and dinners together)

I do have to tell you at one school we served chocolate fondue on the second day of recruitment(then called rush) and there were many girls (PNMs)that hoarded the food. It wasn't pretty.

[Ocalagirl]

Accept the food and drink if offered to you. You don't have to actually eat/drink it if you don't want to.

Something to keep in mind: some houses won't offer water, only soda. Soda can leave a bad taste in your mouth, especially when it is hot outside. So stash a bag of breathmints with your belongings (your recruitment counselor will keep an eye on your things when you are in a recruitment event).

I don't know if its in this thread earlier or in another, but the advice was not to chew gum between rounds because a) you might forget to take it out and b) after you do take it out, your breath can actually smell bad or it leaves another weird taste in your mouth. I thought this was pretty good advice.

I know its hard to remember everything when you are nervous and trying to make conversation with girls, but it truly is good advice.

[SigKapCoug]

You'll probably hear the "take a water or your rusher can't get a water rule" but don't panic about it. We can and do get water between parties -but sometimes its nice since we're talking so much. If you want to cover all the bases just take a drink and take like, one sip. No one will be offended you didn't finish your water;

[LatinaAlumna]

I'm a member of a national Latina sorority, and here are some things that I would recommend that aspirants NOT do at informationals or other recruitment activities:

1. Don't talk about the men in the campus Latino fraternity--don't talk about how you always hang with them, how hot they are, how much you hate them, etc. Refrain from asking if that fraternity is the "brother" organization to the sorority you are interested in. For one thing, you could find out that information ahead of time, and second, why does it even matter?

2. Don't talk about how much you love the sorority's jackets, t-shirts, etc. It makes it look like you are interested just so you can wear letters.

3. Likewise, don't ask about the parties, unless you are asking a question about maintaining balance between academic, service, and social activities.

4. Don't lie. Ever. You will be found out. Further, don't assume that the NPC and NALFO orgs. don't talk to each other. If you first go through NPC rush, do something shady, then try to join a Latina or other non-NPC sorority, it will come out (or vice-versa). When I was chapter president, I had many conversations with the NPC presidents on particular women, and we usually caught them in some sort of lie.

5. Never put down the other Latina sororities (or any sororities) on campus. It is not going to win points at all.

6. If you are invited to participate in the prospective membership process, DO NOT go to the local greek shop and pre-order sorority gear, no matter how "close" you feel that you are to becoming a member. You WILL get caught!

7. Finally, if you don't get invited to pursue membership, or if you do but you drop out, don't be tacky and start an entirely new sorority just so you can call yourself a "founder." At least show some discretion and lay low for awhile if you're going to try to pursue another sorority...but do know that the next sorority WILL ask the first sorority about you...

Things to DO:

1. Do study...HARD! Keep up your time management skills!

2. Definitely talk about your past community service and leadership experiences, as well as other interests at information sessions. We want to get to know you as much as you want to get to know us!

3. If the chapter puts on campus-wide events or activities, you should participate.

4. Think very hard about whether this is the right time for you to take on the responsibility of being in a sorority. Are your grades where you want them to be? Are you actively working towards graduate school, an internship, etc.? Do you have time to go to meetings, hold a leadership role (because most LGLO chapters are small, and EVERY PERSON has to hold an office, sometimes two), participate in service activities, hold down a job (or two), etc.? Will your family understand that you are making a commitment to the organization that will likely take you away from time with them? (This is a HUGE issue in LGLOs).

5. Relax, and be yourself. :)

[Mochababy_989]

HI, Im new and this all has helped me alot. I a "sister" of a member of Zeta Phi Beta and she told me a couple of things to do and not to do.

1. If you want to be a member, the whole campus does not need to know. Tell a member of the org. and leave it alone.
2. DO NOT join a sweetheart group and expect to join the sorority.(Sweetheart group is like a fan club of the Frats)
3. Do your reasearch. Be able to tell the org. about themsleves, and be able to tell them why you want to join.

Thats all I know that seems relevant.

O yea, also, Im not sure if this applies to other people, but I was told just because you know a member doesnt mean the process will be any easier for you.

[AKA_Monet]

HI, Im new and this all has helped me alot. I a "sister" of a member of Zeta Phi Beta and she told me a couple of things to do and not to do.

1. If you want to be a member, the whole campus does not need to know. Tell a member of the org. and leave it alone.
2. DO NOT join a sweetheart group and expect to join the sorority.(Sweetheart group is like a fan club of the Frats)
3. Do your reasearch. Be able to tell the org. about themsleves, and be able to tell them why you want to join.

Thats all I know that seems relevant.

O yea, also, Im not sure if this applies to other people, but I was told just because you know a member doesnt mean the process will be any easier for you.

Greekchat is ONLY a place to discuss relevant events in Greek Lettered Organizations.

Memberships in the NPHC remain undiscussed.

What you need to know can be done by "Private Messaging" or PMing someone with the organization of your interest.

And information and rules about the Threads are posted prominently.

[h.spectacular]

I don't know if anyone mentioned this, but is there certain clothing choices that we should wear when visiting houses?

this is helping me so so much! Thanks!

[AChiOhSnap]

I don't know if anyone mentioned this, but is there certain clothing choices that we should wear when visiting houses?

this is helping me so so much! Thanks!

Browse around the forums, there's no way anyone on here can give you an answer to that vague of a question without knowing your school/region of the country/Greek system, etc. There are plenty of threads on the Recruitment forums that have covered what PNMs from all kinds of different schools should wear for recruitment.

[Frienze2010]

I would say...Dont get so nervous that you decide to chain smoke moments before entering a house...not like you should be smoking anyways. I'm betting that factored into my last cuts. ewww.

[lillylover3]

when i was a PNM once, i had an active tell me how she vomitted in her mouth while watching tv the night before.

keep your mouth shut[pun intended] especially when tlaking to roommates/friends during FR!!! you don't want things to be misconstrude and you end up getting dropped from a house you like--i know too many girls that's happend to!

[ΑΓΔSquirrel10]

It was during rush, and I was in the cafeteria when I noticed that one of the girls rushing was standing behind me in the line. I clearly overheard her say, "I really hope this sorority stuff is worth it, because I've already missed 3 frat parties this week." :eek:

PNM's, be careful of what you say ALL THE TIME! It could come back to haunt you.

[SthrnZeta]

It was during rush, and I was in the cafeteria when I noticed that one of the girls rushing was standing behind me in the line. I clearly overheard her say, "I really hope this sorority stuff is worth it, because I've already missed 3 frat parties this week." :eek:

WOW - we know where her priorities were... :rolleyes:

[ΑΓΔSquirrel10]

I don't know if anyone mentioned this, but is there certain clothing choices that we should wear when visiting houses?

this is helping me so so much! Thanks!

Contact your Greek Life Office. My school's Panhellenic Recruitment info booklet tells you exactly what is acceptable for each night (and has pictures of different outfits also).

[KSUViolet06]

DON'T make a Greek Chat username/AIM screename/etc with a sorority name in it if you're not a sister.

For example: IwannabeDZ, FutureChiO, TriDeltHopeful, GonnaBeAnAKA

[33girl]

if i posted your question on *****.com

Yes, spammer, we would all mind very much.

All material on Greekchat.com is copyrighted and reuse on other sites can result in Federal prosecution.

[SigKapAngel767]

My best advice would be to be gracious to everyone :)

[OTW]

Yes, spammer, we would all mind very much.

All material on Greekchat.com is copyrighted and reuse on other sites can result in Federal prosecution.

Obviously the people at HPRL didn't get that memo.

[skylark]

No matter what DON'T ... show up to ABC sorority's event and immediately say as you walk up to a greeter "Oh my gosh, I just got done having the best cake at XYZ's event. By the way, do you know where the DEFs are having their event?"

It happened to me at this year's recruitment.

[h.spectacular]

well, I just finished recruitment at my school, and just wanted everyone to know that their tips payed off! I got a bid to Sigma Kappa at my school, Upsilon Chapter. Thanks!

[aphimilwaukee]

we have the 3 b's rule
no boys, booze or bars should brought up.

[kstar]

we have the 3 b's rule
no boys, booze or bars should brought up.

we always had the 4Bs: Boys, Booze, Bible, and Bank Accounts.

[Dani_Sigmagirl]

We had a girl tell a story at formal recruitment about working special olympics. She actually told a PNM (whose brother has down syndrome) about asking a boy that was participating what his name was. The boy said "I'm wearing a name tag, duh!" And the sister went on to say "I wanted to tell him 'You're the one in special olympics, retard!'"

Luckily, the PNM still decided to join our chapter, because she's a great member! She told me about this after she got initiated, and I couldn't believe it!

Our chapter now does workshops over what NOT to say during recruitment!

[Jill1228]

we always had the 4Bs: Boys, Booze, Bible, and Bank Accounts.

add #5
Boys, Booze, Bible, and Bank Accounts, Bush/politics in general

[txcutie]

i don't think that this has been mentioned but by no means talk badly about not only other sororities, but also another rushee. whether what you say about them is true or not, it will not help you by making you look better than someone else; it just shows insecurity and sororities are attracted to confidence. my school's rush is deferred, so there is a lot of socializing between rushees and sorority girls in the fall semester and sometimes in casual occasions, and i've noticed that freshmen tend to gossip about other girls who are rushing. this is a big turn-off!

[OTW]

i don't think that this has been mentioned but by no means talk badly about another rushee.

Absolutely. WONDERFUL ADVICE.

[JennLev]

We had a girl rush and did not get let in, she actually said some horrible things that were not true about our sorority to other people on campus. I feel she said those things because we did not let her in, however the things that she said about our girls really hurt our reputation on campus. She did not end up joining a sorority so there was no one to go to to get her to stop saying these things. I wish there was a way to stop that also, but unfortunately I guess you just have to roll with the punches. Would be neat if you could sue someone for that for liable, not that I would ever take it that far, but someone spreading fake rumors can hurt your membership if it was really bad.

[LucyKKG]

People have said stuff like this before, but don't talk smack in public! I went to the bathroom in between philanthropy rounds at our last recruitment, and I ran into some PNMs. (Our room and the other NPC's room were both close to it.) Three PNMs were talking about how bored they were right in front of me and my sisters. Duh! Needless to say, they didn't join either group.

Prepare yourself for questions you may be asked (like a job interview). After reading these posts, I realized I need to do the same thing! If someone asked me what I like to do for fun, what would I say? I thought of several things, but it's easier to tell someone later if you think about it beforehand.

Learn about the sorority if you are truly interested in it. (It doesn't have to be in a stalker way!) I would be really impressed if a PNM brought up our volunteer work with the homeless shelter.

Dress nicely even if your school doesn't have a cut-throat recruitment. I remember that my (now) little sis was wearing a nice sweater and skirt. She was a little over-dressed, but she looked really nice. I can tell she put thought into her outfit and it reflected in her personality as well.

Oooh I'm excited for recruitment now!

[ktbug10474]

Hey ya'll !!!

I had a question about recruitment. I've already completed my freshman year but this past may i took a semester off to do an internship at disney.
therefore, i missed the 07 rush.

What i was wondering is since I missed this year's rush will that put me in a bad spot? I will be a sophomore when I rush in the fall. Also, I do attend college in the south.

And thank ya'll so much for posting this, this makes me feel so much better about rush, even though it's quite a few months away. :)

[katiebug_ddd]

i remember when i went through recruitment, a rusher of mine asked me if i partied and even if i had ever tried any kind of drugs! it made me very uncomfortable and turned me off to the entire sorority!!

KEEP IT CLASSY, LADIES!

[luv n tpa]

Before adding PNMs on Facebook became taboo [aka when I rushed], sister from ABC sorority added me right away after their first party. I thought it was desperate and creepy. Ladies, show that you're interested, but don't stalk the PNMs. :p

And dearest PNMs, let me tell you a tale. Once upon a time, I was an affliliated Rho Chi . I was waiting for the second group of girls to arrive for their preference ceremony with TPA, when one girl and her friend were talking to me. And I quote, "I just came from ABC. It was awesome, I really like them. I don't really like TPA, they kinda suck. But I'm just going so people don't think that I'm a loser and only got one pref."

One more time, I was an [I]affiliated Rho Chi. Yeah. End of that story. :rolleyes:

[dukemama]

Before adding PNMs on Facebook became taboo [aka when I rushed], sister from ABC sorority added me right away after their first party. I thought it was desperate and creepy. Ladies, show that you're interested, but don't stalk the PNMs. :p

And dearest PNMs, let me tell you a tale. Once upon a time, I was an affliliated Rho Chi . I was waiting for the second group of girls to arrive for their preference ceremony with TPA, when one girl and her friend were talking to me. And I quote, "I just came from ABC. It was awesome, I really like them. I don't really like TPA, they kinda suck. But I'm just going so people don't think that I'm a loser and only got one pref."

One more time, I was an [I]affiliated Rho Chi. Yeah. End of that story. :rolleyes:
D'oh! :eek:

Pray tell, did that girl get a bid anywhere?

[Thetagirl218]

Some of my pet peeves with PNMs during Formal.... (Disclaimer, I witnessed all of these!)



Girls who walk into the recruitment party and trash talk my sorority in front of my face without even learning about it......I actually had one PNM tell me that XYZ said you were soft on some issue....Needless to say I was not happy, and I don't think that girl came back the next night.
Girls who trash talk other sororities. I hate it when some PNMs think they are going to make themselves look good when they trash talk other sororities that they have already visited or have heard about. I always took offense to that as I had friends in all of the sororities on campus. One PNM even told me a soroities member's name who she has met and didn't like... Little did she know that that girl was a friend of mine.... :)
One time during recruitment, I had met a PNM who stared at my chest the entire time!!!! Now talk about feel unconformable.... Mind you I was wearing a collared shirt at the time.....I guess this girl was very nervous, but when she came back the next time she did the same thing to several of my sisters....weird...

[33girl]

Girls who trash talk other sororities. I hate it when some PNMs think they are going to make themselves look good when they trash talk other sororities that they have already visited or have heard about. I always took offense to that as I had friends in all of the sororities on campus. One PNM even told me a soroities member's name who she has met and didn't like... Little did she know that that girl was a friend of mine.... :)


This is terrible, and VERY awkward for the sorority member (even if she hates the other sorority's guts) because we're not supposed to talk about other sororities AT ALL - we can be penalized if we do - and because we don't want to "reprimand" the PNM. Rock and a hard place.

[cuteASAbug]

Last semester, I went to NJ with some volunteers to help out one of our chapters with recruitment because they had low numbers at the time. I ended up talking to a one of their rushees. I started talking to her about sorority life and how great it is and asked her what made her come out to recruitment. Her response- I'm trying to join Delta Sigma Theta and I'm only looking at all of your sororities as a last resort. I really didn't know how to respond to that. I should've gotten her name so I could've gotten my Delta friend to write her a very special rec. I know that PNM's are told to be themselves during recruitment, but there is a thing as being yourself a little too much.

[MerryGPhiB]

... the best response is to be curious and active listen. One you may find out what her specifics interests are and be able to turn it into an opportunity. Such as, well I'm glad you're excited about_____ (feel free to fill this in - such as - the leadership opportunities)- , you may want to ask that exact question of each other groups as too and find out what makes each unique. It's a great time to get to know about all of the houses on campus.

If she gets released by her favorite, she'll appreciate the suggestion and many times it gets a young woman to rethink the opportunity sitting right in front of her......

I learned a fabulous saying in Grad school.... you don't know what you don't know..... it is so very true. So often we think, XYZ is the one and only house.... yet we have never even looked at the opportunities right in front of us!:D

[denimeans]

Just because you know 'everyone' in JKL and your 'best friend' is in UV, that does not mean you get a bid. It also doesn't mean that you will even like JKL or UV! If you like PQR the best for you, then that's the answer :)




This year I had a girl who absolutly could not talk to---She looked bored, seemed pissed off just bad attitude....but this is what made me mad.

I started telling her a little about our chapter, conecting stuff we do to things she was talking about .
Her response "You don't need to tell me about you sorority. I used to date an A E Pi. I already know everyone in your sorority and I know everything about it."

I didn't have much to say......I red carded her...and she didn't get a bid from us or anyone else....she tried informal too with us...

Point being, don't assume/say you know everythingif you don't know me! If the girls are repeating themselves, let them know, but that's it.

As it turns out, she is actually a rather sweet girl, but with her attitude that somehow she should automatically get in, she will never get in anywhere.

[denimeans]

At Minnesota, we as sorority members were ABSOLUTELY NOT ALLOWED to discuss those famous B's:
Bible (religion)
Booze (drugs of any kind)
Bank (how much/little money your family has)
Bed (sexual habits)
Bush (politics)
Bash (dirty rushing/dissing other sororities)


We are actually supposed to (subtly) ask them about money to make sure they can pay, as do most chapters on campus

We live by SAM
Support- do their parents, boyfriend, siblings etc. like/hate the idea?
Academics/Activities-Is this girl already involved? We want campus leaders. Does she study? Skip class?
Money- Does she have a job? Scholarships? Is she already struggling to pay for school?

Money is flat out the #1 reason why girls drop....and our dues are only about $500 a year.

Point being there's a reason to ask/tell about money. If you can't pay your bills before rush, how are you going to be able to handle them and a sorority.

[KSUViolet06]

We are actually supposed to (subtly) ask them about money to make sure they can pay, as do most chapters on campus




I'm really glad we were all required to hand out financial info brochures during recruitment so we never had to try and figure out if they could afford it. If a girl coudnt afford it, she dropped out of recruitment.

[denimeans]

I'm really glad we were all required to hand out financial info brochures during recruitment so we never had to try and figure out if they could afford it. If a girl coudnt afford it, she dropped out of recruitment.

We do do that too, but most girls don't just drop out of recruitment. You still have to kind of read them to find out if they can pay....most girls stay in recruitment even when they're not quite sure how they're going to pay for it.

[Zillini]

Just when I think I've heard it all, somebody comes up with something new. This actually happened this past year.

Don't talk about the boob job your parents gave you as a birthday present. We don't want to know how badly you needed one, what a great job your surgeon did, how real they look, how real they feel, nor how all the guys "love 'em". :eek:

[Football Fan]

Zillini,
Bingo! This tale wins the prize! I am still laughing.

[AOIIalum]

I guess we have something to add to the "B's": Booze, boys, bank accounts, and boobs!

[FSUZeta]

unless talking to a zeta about our phil. of course, ones boob job has nothing to do with that ;)!

[AOII Angel]

New rule...if you feel a little gassy, don't lean away from your rusher and pass gas in her face! I swear it happened to one of my sisters. The girl was not trying to be offensive, she really didn't even acknowledge that she did it. In the end, she did not get a bid to any group so I guess she did similar things at other parties!

[violetpretty]

I guess we have something to add to the "B's": Booze, boys, bank accounts, and boobs!

boys, booze, bank, bible, ballot, bitches/boobs

[AGDee]

Please note: Only Chuck Norris can injure women during recruitment and still receive bids to all 26 NPCs.

[UGAalum94]

It seems a little funny to say that these are "rules" as if they are at the level and the panhellenic rules that can get your chapter sanctions.

I think it's a really bad idea to talk about any of them and probably most conversations about any will be in poor taste or otherwise offensive.

But, if a PNM brings something up, a reaction of "we're not allowed to talk about that" is going to be far more awkward than just gracefully following up or redirecting.

For example if a PNM told you that she had spent all summer working for the Obama campaign, isn't it going to make her feel more appreciated and welcome to follow up on that statement?

Again, I totally agree that no member should initiate a conversation on those points and should gracefully get out without telling any stories about the chapter or sisters.

I have no idea what someone should say about a boob job. Maybe just a "how wonderful that you can feel your best about yourself" ?

[BabyPiNK_FL]

We do do that too, but most girls don't just drop out of recruitment. You still have to kind of read them to find out if they can pay....most girls stay in recruitment even when they're not quite sure how they're going to pay for it.

We have that same problem on our campus. We talk about dues on Philanthropy night and we'll basically say something along the lines of "Is this a realistic amount for you?" We're allowed to ask pretty much flat out. But still we get girls dropping because they are broke. Or continuing through rush and then not accepting the bid cos their broke. I mean really, it's very obvious who's the cheapest on our campus, if you must join and you have limited funds, use this additional time to see if that chapter is somewhere you feel comfortable or get a job if you don't like them because those are pretty much your options! We also get women who say, "I don't have time for this". We explain all of our great activities during rush. That's what attracted you in the first place. If you don't have time, why don't you just join a club or something or sit at home and stare at the walls instead of wasting valuable time and taking a bid from someone who may have been a great member? If we told you we never did anything, then why would you have wanted to join?

[Zillini]

I have no idea what someone should say about a boob job. Maybe just a "how wonderful that you can feel your best about yourself" ?
As I recall the active managed a rather stunned "Um, gee, that's nice."

In the game of Comebacks I wish I'd thought of that always happens after these incidents, I admit my favorite was "So what are you getting done next? Your nose or lipo?" Bad Z. :D

[wsuTriDelt]

I'm sure this has already been said but just be as nice to the girls you talk to as you can. More than not they're just as nervous as you are. When I went through recruitment some PNMs were flat out rude. You may not like a house you're invited back to but that doesn't mean you never utter a word, go to the bathroom and stay in there then entire time or tell a girl straight out 'I hate this house, don't envite me back'.
Just because you don't like a house the first day doesn't mean it's not the house from you, I wasn't too sold on my house the first day I went, but by the end of the week I realized it was the house for me.
With a few exceptions, you'll usually end up in the right house for you. Just keep in mind that even if you don't like a house the things you say to them during recruitement is usually remembered, and you don't want to start off greek life with a bad rep.
Anyway that's my 2 cents :]
GO TRI DELTA!

[wsuTriDelt]

Oh and don't dumb yourself down.
I heard a girl during recruitment this year asked a PNM what her favorite color was....her reply? 'Zebra.'

[Zillini]

I'm sure this has already been said but just be as nice to the girls you talk to as you can. More than not they're just as nervous as you are. When I went through recruitment some PNMs were flat out rude. You may not like a house you're invited back to but that doesn't mean you never utter a word, go to the bathroom and stay in there then entire time or tell a girl straight out 'I hate this house, don't envite me back'.
Just because you don't like a house the first day doesn't mean it's not the house from you, I wasn't too sold on my house the first day I went, but by the end of the week I realized it was the house for me.
With a few exceptions, you'll usually end up in the right house for you. Just keep in mind that even if you don't like a house the things you say to them during recruitement is usually remembered, and you don't want to start off greek life with a bad rep.
Anyway that's my 2 cents :]
GO TRI DELTA!
I've never understood anyone who behaved like that. The least you can do is pin a smile on your face and go through the motions. There is no need to be rude. If a PNM gets invited to a chapter she isn't interested, well all she has to do is not accept. Duh!

These young women seem to forget that they may end up in class with someone from that chapter after Recruitment is over. Or an active might be friends with or live/room with someone from another chapter the PNM IS interested in. Actives can talk just as much as PNMs about their Recruitment experience/impressions, just not about their selection process.

On the flip side, I'm forever stressing to my actives that there will be PNMs they don't click with, that they may not even like. But it's their job to play the role of a gracious hostess. Every PNM that doesn't receive an invitation to the next round should shocked because she had such a nice time. The actives also forget PNMs talk about their experiences at the different chapters. Who wants to join a group that was rude to your new friend?

I think the problem is that we're dealing with 18-21 year olds. Not all of them have mastered the social skill of masking their true feelings with politeness. The craziness of a competitive Recruitment does serve a purpose. It should to teach the young women to deal with (sometimes) uncomfortable even forced social interaction, as well as stress. Sadly not everyone has learned those lessons very well yet.

[MTSUGURL]

If a PNM gets invited to a chapter she isn't interested, well all she has to do is not accept. Duh!



On my campus, you had to attend all parties you were invited back too unless your invites exceeded the number of parties you could attend. Not accepting an invitation wasn't an option if your number of invites was equal to or less than the number of parties you could go to. Not that this excuses rudeness - nothing does. I just wish I'd been able to slap a few of the girls in my recruitment group - their behavior made me embarrassed for them.

[MSKKG]

There is no excuse for rudeness, and one reason I've heard for it is that these PNMs either don't want to rush and are being coerced into it by their family or are only interested in a particular chapter. They want to put the "cutting" monkey on the "undesirable" chapters' backs so they can report to their moms that "the ABCs and XYZs cut me and I don't know why--guess I wasn't meant for sorority life/I'll have to join DEF." They are then victims of circumstance and not responsible for their decision to drop out completely or their decision to choose the GLO they want.

[littleowl33]

Don't make up a legacy!!! Our chapter had a PNM come through who wanted us so badly that she told every sister she talked to that her grandmother was a Kappa. We checked with headquarters and... no dice. Do these girls think we're not going to check?? We cut her immediately for lying like that.

[ztamsu07]

To the rushers (actives):

Please have respect in yourself and the wonderful greek organization you are a part of. Now don't take this as you should be concited, not at all, but just read my story and you'll understand..

When I was going through rush, I talked to girls at one house and while we were on the house tour, they showed me a bedroom with pictures of places they'd gone with the sorority and stuff like that and told me about them. Wonderful. But for some reason, the girl would continually say, "Well we hosted blah blah, but I didn't go" or "we went to whatever city for our philanthropy, but I didn't go" and said that about just about every event. Now, why would I want to be in a sorority that doesn't want to attend their own events?? Anyway.. I dropped them, but still got invited back the next day, so...

It was now philanthropy day. I got better girls that day, but the last one I only had time to talk to for a minute. There were pictures of the girls doing philanthropic events on each table, and the active looked at a picture and say "Oh! That's my roommate/bestfriend, isn't she PRETTY?" I politely answered yes, because of course, she was, but then she asked "Don't you like her hair??" Once again, polite yes, because I did, it wasn't a lie, but I wasn't exactly sure why I was asked that and it definately made me uncomforable. Luckily we left right after that, but on the way out, she saw a picture of herself on another table and yelled "Oh my gosh! That is so cruel!!" and turned the picture of herself around! It was a great picture of course, and I know I sure wouldn't make a fool out of myself during rush like that no matter how bad of a picture it actually was.

Needless to say I didn't go back. Girls, seriously, we are all intelligent, involved, beautiful women, and so please "sell" (for lack of a better word) your sorority in a way that you would continually want it to be percived. I now know a ton of girls from that sorority, and they are all excellent! If by getting to know these girls I think they're great, I don't know why during rush we can't at least portray ourselves as being excellent, because I know we all are. Keep that in mind, you are making a reputation for your sorority to these girls during recrutment, so please respect yourselves and show off your sorority as a great one. I know they all are.

[bnice35]

Why shouldn't that be kept quiet about the married woman wanted to rush

[aggiegphi]

Hopefully this doesn't happen to you, but if it does please be aware of your surroundings...
If you happen to have a break under the tents and are talking with your Rho Gammas/ Recruitment Counselors/etc. about your options of remaining houses, and the RCs suddenly start bashing the houses, a) please don't listen to them, b) don't engage further into that topic, c) tell a member of the Panhellenic staff/ Greek Life advisor about the incident.
This happened one year I was on Panhellenic staff and a member of the chapter being talked about was standing behind the Recruitment Counselors at the time, but they did not realize it.

Remember to have fun in ALL of the houses, trust me the girls will remember you later if you acted any in way rude or bored.

[alphagamgirl06]

What I am about to say has probably all ready been mention but I feel the need to give some advise to PNMs and Actives during Formal Recruitment. I have seen way to many things done and said that just shouldnt happen.


PNMs

If you go to more than 1 pref party when it comes time to fill out your pref card please think about it long and hard. If you know that you went to a pref party for a chapter that you know you wont accept a bid from please dont rank them. I would never want to advise suiciding but in some cases I would rather you suicide than reject a bid. Just because on bid when that sorority is expecting you to run out with all the other new memebers and it is really sad when they give 22 bids and only 11 girls accept them. And if you do accept the bid to a chapter that wasnt your first choice on bid day please dont be rude and cry and ignore the sisters of that chapter.
During a party never tell the active girl you dont like her chapter. How would you feel if somebody said they didnt like your whole family. Its not nice and just rude.
Lastly, Please never tell an active you would cry if you dont get a bid from her chapter because you put her in a really awkward situation.Actives

When a girl tells you she she doesnt like your chapter please just smile and tell her that you are happy she is excited about joining greek life. Just because she is rude to you doesnt mean you should stoop down to her level.
When bid day doesnt turn out the way you hoped please keep a smile on your face and celebrate your new members. You should never have a negative attitude on bid day.
Please Please dont constantly talk about yourself when talking to a pnm. You are trying to get to know her if she ask you a question about yourself keep it short and sweet. Dont go on and on and on about yourself. If you must talk about yourself talk mainly about your chapter then.

[33girl]

When bid day doesnt turn out the way you hoped please keep a smile on your face and celebrate your new members. You should never have a negative attitude on bid day.


Ain't that the truth....

If you got 5 girls when the other sororities got 30...make the most of your bid day with those girls. They may have friends who didn't want to go through rush or who dropped out or who got cut who would make AWESOME sisters. That's what COB is for. They will be more likely to recommend joining if you stay positive.

If you find out the girl who you and half the sorority wanted for your little joined another group instead...hash out your feelings in private with your sisters, and then MOVE ON. Yeah, it hurts to be screwed over by a rushee like this....but it often turns out that a few years down the line she's regretting her decision.

[PhiSigLisa]

Please, please respect the "bubble" of personal space. I had a PNM who I had met once before leaning all over me at a COB event. It made me so uncomfortable and I'm not one of those "don't touch me" types!

Also, school always comes first. Don't skip class to come to events (my school has a lot of night classes for certain majors) and don't blow off your work. And if you do, don't talk about it!

[DDDlady]

I am sure that this has already been mentioned in another post, but these 2 things (especially the 1st one) are things you should never say during recruitment.

1) The semester before recruitment, our campus hosts a Saturday of brunches at the houses for girls that are seniors in high school or are planning to go through recruitment. These are short, informal things that last only about 20 minutes or so. The girls come in, grab a glass of punch, and chat to some actives. Anyway... This one girl come in to our house, starts talking to an active, and the first question out of her mouth is, "So tell me about all of the stereotypes for each of the houses. Like which ones are the smart girls, the party girls, the you really don't want to be their sister house?" The actives mouth fell open, and politely replied that we do not give merit to any stereotypes and all of the houses have their own unique personalities.

2) PNMs please.... If you are a legacy to another house, that is fine. I was a legacy to another house than the one I pledged. That said... DO NOT walk into a house, announce that you are an in house legacy, you will be there on bid day, and that you hate the house you are in. That is so rude, and if your legacy falls through (which happens more and more every year due to increasing numbers), you have ruined any chance you had with any other house.

[megangammaphi]

I just wanted to say that of all the things i have read on this discussion the MOST important one for PNM's is if you do not like a house do NOT be rude to that girl and here's a reason I do not believe has been mentioned: chances are the girl you are rude to HAS FRIENDS IN OTHER HOUSES. Just because you don't like one house as much as another doesn't mean you can be mean to them, because when someone is overly rude in our rush we are urged to report them to panellenic and all other houses are told what that girl has said. So that house you liked so much more than the one you were rude to, well you can kiss it good bye.

[twinkle555]

I just wanted to say that of all the things i have read on this discussion the MOST important one for PNM's is if you do not like a house do NOT be rude to that girl and here's a reason I do not believe has been mentioned: chances are the girl you are rude to HAS FRIENDS IN OTHER HOUSES. Just because you don't like one house as much as another doesn't mean you can be mean to them, because when someone is overly rude in our rush we are urged to report them to panellenic and all other houses are told what that girl has said. So that house you liked so much more than the one you were rude to, well you can kiss it good bye.

I totally agree with this! Whenever there has been a super rude girl in our house during recruitment, she "mysteriously" drops out or doesnt get a bid, probably due to the fact that GIRLS TALK!!

[alphagamgirl06]

I just wanted to say that of all the things i have read on this discussion the MOST important one for PNM's is if you do not like a house do NOT be rude to that girl and here's a reason I do not believe has been mentioned: chances are the girl you are rude to HAS FRIENDS IN OTHER HOUSES. Just because you don't like one house as much as another doesn't mean you can be mean to them, because when someone is overly rude in our rush we are urged to report them to panellenic and all other houses are told what that girl has said. So that house you liked so much more than the one you were rude to, well you can kiss it good bye.

I Agree so much and the same thing goes for actives. When you meet a pnm that you don't like don't be rude to her because you never know who her friends or roommate are. Her best friend could be your rush crush and when that poor pnm who you were rude to tells her friend about it chances are that other girl will no longer be interested in your chapter.

[KSUViolet06]

I just wanted to say that of all the things i have read on this discussion the MOST important one for PNM's is if you do not like a house do NOT be rude to that girl and here's a reason I do not believe has been mentioned: chances are the girl you are rude to HAS FRIENDS IN OTHER HOUSES.


So true. As an alumna, I can tell you that yes, we talk. If there was someone who was horribly rude, I had no problem telling my friends in other sororities.

[KSUViolet06]

Something important:

Be mindful of what you post here on GreekChat.

Don't ever assume "oh sorority members from my school don't post/lurk here."

Thousands of people come to this site every day. Some of them could very well include sorority members from your school.

If you're on GC posting really specific questions and including identifying information in your posts, it's not hard for girls from your school to figure out who you are.

This is no big deal if you're just asking normal questions about rush.

But if you're asking questions like "who's the best" or saying things about different sororities on campus "i.e. I will only consider ABC & XYZ", recruitment could become VERY difficult for you if sorority members from your school see that.


A general rule of thumb about posting here: If you wouldn't want a sorority member from your school to see it, don't post it.

[PANTHERTEKE]

I know this is for sororities but I have something to add, and since you girls are always crashing the Fraternity Recruitment forum I don't think you all would mind :p

Anyways... Something to think about is what you say, even if you THINK no one is paying attention.

This past spring we had some guy said "If I don't get a bid I'm slitting my wrists" and a brother overheard it, so sure enough......he didn't get a bid. Lol.

[KappaKittyCat]

Anyways... Something to think about is what you say, even if you THINK no one is paying attention.

This past spring we had some guy said "If I don't get a bid I'm slitting my wrists" and a brother overheard it, so sure enough......he didn't get a bid. Lol.
I'm going to expand that to say, in general, don't mention mental/physical illness at all. Otherwise you'll get pegged as "the Ebola (or whatever) rushee."

[ASUADPi]

DON'T wear clothes that you can't sit in! A girl went through recruitment at ASU like 4 years ago, she was a legacy to us, and she showed up chewing gum (another no-no), wearing a backwards baseball cap and a jean skirt. The kicker was that she sat with her legs wide open and the sisters saw her thong. DON'T DO THIS! (What was worse is that it was the first round and we couldn't drop her, thankfully she dropped us, besides the clothing issue the girls hated her)

DON'T assume that your legacy house will be a "shoo-in". Too often we have read threads from legacy's who just don't fit in with their legacy house and pledge elsewhere which goes to the DO keep your options open.

[Phine]

DON'T wear clothes that you can't sit in! A girl went through recruitment at ASU like 4 years ago, she was a legacy to us, and she showed up chewing gum (another no-no), wearing a backwards baseball cap and a jean skirt. The kicker was that she sat with her legs wide open and the sisters saw her thong. DON'T DO THIS! (What was worse is that it was the first round and we couldn't drop her, thankfully she dropped us, besides the clothing issue the girls hated her)

In the same vein, watch your tops. Don't wear a shirt to recruitment that you wouldn't wear out with your parents. This past recruitment, two PNMS wore shirts that were so low cut we ended up referring to one as "nipple girl" (you can guess why) and one as "boob girl". Cleavage doesn't help get a bid, at least from my chapter. ;)

[richi]

I just want to add as a caution to PNMs please PLEASE do not use profanity, we had a girl ( a legacy no less) who had a huge potty mouth during spring recruitment, needless to say she did not get a bid. If you want to join a classy organization please act classy and do not use distasteful language no matter how "comfortable" you feel it really makes you look unprofessional and immature...two things that are not valued in the Greek community!

[ausoror]

sorry to bring this back but another thing to NEVER tell an active (friend or not) is that you are rushing "just to meet people"

[OTW]

sorry to bring this back but another thing to NEVER tell an active (friend or not) is that you are rushing "just to meet people"

If a PNM ever mentioned to me that she was rushing because she wanted to meet new people, I wouldn't hold it against her.

Adding the "just" is another story.

[ClassynPearls]

When i recruit i am always looking for that one thing that I and the PNM have in common. So be open about your interests and hobbies it really helps the recruiter out!

[LightBulb]

Do make yourself stand out... don't take it overboard!

A PNM from my school learned this the hard way...

Do not wear Shrek ears to formal recruitment.

[SigKapCoug]

Do make yourself stand out... don't take it overboard!

A PNM from my school learned this the hard way...

Do not wear Shrek ears to formal recruitment.


..... what??

[brwn skn 79]

As a non greek and a hopeful AI, I thank you all for the advice.

[OTW]

As a non greek and a hopeful AI, I thank you all for the advice.

I don't get it.

In your first post, you introduced yourself in the Zeta Phi Beta forum. Now you thank us for the advice in a thread that has absolutely nothing to do with Alumnae Initiation?

[phimubabycorn]

avoid the 5 B's

booze, bible, bank, boys, and bitches..

also steer clear of politics

=)

[knight_shadow]

I don't get it.

In your first post, you introduced yourself in the Zeta Phi Beta forum. Now you thank us for the advice in a thread that has absolutely nothing to do with Alumnae Initiation?

She may be talking about "rushing" for grad chapter. Still comes off kind of suspect though.

[DMBabyZTA]

Please please please I cannot stress this enough- If you have a problem with a specific group, maybe something was said to make you feel uncomfortable, tell your Gamma Chi (Rho whichever). When I went through I had a *not mentioned* sorority sister ask me how much money my daddy made. And since I went to college in the same town I went to high school she asked what part of town I grew up in. I was so blown away that she had the nerve to say such things. I went straight to my RC.. so if this or something like this happens, don't tell anyone else but your Gamma Chi.

Also, if you have to use the bathroom in the middle of a conversation with a sister, TELL HER. We had a girl pee herself.. not kidding.

And know that we are just as nervous as you are. After all we are going through this process to welcome our new sisters in the end. We have certain routines to go through as well. It is a very stressful, yet exciting time for you and the house's which you are visiting. Relax, breathe, be yourself, and have fun.

another thing... if given the opportunity take advantage of introducing yourself to every sister... making a good, lasting impression is key! (especially if it's the sorority you want to rush) :)

I hope this helps!! good luck

[Lbevans12]

Ok, so if I am rushing at a large SEC school in the south, if they ask me what I do for fun is it ok to say "I like to go out with my friends... "?

[carnation]

You might rephrase that so that nobody thinks you're staggering from bar to bar with them.

[UGAalum94]

Ok, so if I am rushing at a large SEC school in the south, if they ask me what I do for fun is it ok to say "I like to go out with my friends... "?

You might rephrase that so that nobody thinks you're staggering from bar to bar with them.

Well, at least do some follow up to make sure it sounds reasonably wholesome. People in the groups probably do go to bars with their friends sometimes, as anyone who has every been to Athens, Georgia can attest, but it's not going to be a rush conversation topic at most chapters..

So name some stuff you and your friends like to go out and do without getting liquored up.

[kouros1973]

A gentleman never discusses politics or religion... That's always a pretty good rule to follow.
dear kevin a gentleman is always redy to discuss EVERYTHING for fear is not a gentleman's way but correct critic of matters is.

[lady bri]

Whatever you do just be yourself, any sorority will like you for who you are not for who you're pretending to be.

[Naddy08]

You might rephrase that so that nobody thinks you're staggering from bar to bar with them.

LOL! That'll make a great conversation

[ceruleanstar]

I'll be rushing very soon... Just wanted to ask a quick question about conversation. Last year, I pledged a non-Panhellenic sorority (I'm of an ethnic minority and I thought this would be a great idea to join a GLO with a cultural twist) and depledged because I felt that I was hazed and because I was disappointed with the sorority's lack of enthusiasm and philanthropic work. Should I truthfully mention this at rush if sorority women ask why I didn't do Panhellenic rush last year and/or why I didn't go through with being initiated at the non-Panhellenic sorority? Or would this be seen as trash-talking another GLO?

[Lightning Bug!]

Just say it wasn't what you were looking for...the active rushing you probably will ask, "What are you looking for?" not "What did they do to you?", giving you a chance to talk about what you are looking for in a sisterhood. And if they do ask about the negative ("What happened?"), then restate your first answer and elaborate..."Oh, it just wasn't what I was looking for..I'm really interested in finding a home that offers X, Y, and Z..."

Now if they ask about why you didn't rush in the Panhellenic system last year, then you might say that it took you a year to realize that it was a Panhellenic sorority that would offer you those things that you were looking for.

[OTW]

I'll be rushing very soon... Just wanted to ask a quick question about conversation. Last year, I pledged a non-Panhellenic sorority (I'm of an ethnic minority and I thought this would be a great idea to join a GLO with a cultural twist) and depledged because I felt that I was hazed and because I was disappointed with the sorority's lack of enthusiasm and philanthropic work. Should I truthfully mention this at rush if sorority women ask why I didn't do Panhellenic rush last year and/or why I didn't go through with being initiated at the non-Panhellenic sorority? Or would this be seen as trash-talking another GLO?

I was in the same boat almost 10 years ago...hazed and all.

If asked why you didn't go through Panhellenic rush last year, I'd be straight up and front with them. If they ask why you weren't initiated, just say that you realized that it wasn't a good fit for you, and that's why you left. It's general and it doesn't put anyone down.

Chances are, the girls probably already know how your former group really is, so there's really no need to go into details.

When I joined my NPC sorority, I was up front with them. In fact, it was their Fall pledges who saw me crying at the top of the stairs because I had just come from a really crappy local pledge meeting. I got to know these new girls really well after that, and I was initiated the following Spring.

[ceruleanstar]

Thanks so much, Lightning Bug! and OTW! That really helped. :)

[NancyT6061]

Top sororities are not just looking for another cute, fun member. Top sororities are looking for what PNMs can contribute to the sorority, sisterhood and campus life.

Academics, character, leadership and the ability to be a good friend are always valuable. Having something special that PNMs can bring like a talent, skill, interest or likely role to enrich the chapter, sorority or campus is always important.

Party girls with questionable grades are a dime a dozen and frequently create problems without contributing much to the sisterhood. Truly strong houses have figured that out and aren't swayed by that.

I'm a former sorority advisor and and when the chapters I advised were able to grasp these principles and recruit for girls exhibiting these characteristics, their recuitment and campus standing immediately soared.

PNMs want to be a part of something they can respect and strive to be a part of.

[ΑΓΔSquirrel10]

DON'T say anything negative about ANY sorority during rush. One girl this year was trying to guess what sorority her Pi Chi (or Rho Chi, Gamma Chi, whatever your school calls them) was in. She said, to the Pi Chi's face:
"Well, I know you can't be an XYZ, because you are way too pretty to be one of them."
Turns out, the Pi Chi was a member of XYZ sorority, and she had to excuse herself before she started bawling her eyes out in front of everyone.

[AOIIalum]

ΑΓΔSquirrel10, it takes a lot to shock me these days and that did. What a horrible thing to say to anyone, let alone your recruitment counselor!

[AOII_LB93]

ΑΓΔSquirrel10, it takes a lot to shock me these days and that did. What a horrible thing to say to anyone, let alone your recruitment counselor!

Sadly, this is not the first time I have heard of this happening. Some people just have little or no tact.:rolleyes:

[KSUViolet06]

Sadly, this is not the first time I have heard of this happening. Some people just have little or no tact.:rolleyes:

True.

Advice to PNMs:

If you should happen to be so tactless as to insult a sorority to your Rho Chi/Pi Chi/whatever, don't assume that because she is disaffiliated that she does not care or is just going to ignore it.

Yes in perfect world, Rho Chi's would remain perfectly neutral and not care what PNMs said about which chapters.

But in the days of texting/Facebook/MySpace messaging, it would be very easy for an insulted Rho Chi to send a message out to her friends in other chapters or her own chapter telling them that you're a rude little snot. So it definitely pays to watch what you say.

[mahdian]

so im about to rush soon.. i was wondering if it would be okay, if a girl were to ask me why i wanted to join a sorority, to mention something along the line of 'last year could have been better if i had decided to rush'.

i mean obviouslyyyy im in it for the great friends, lasting relationships with others in greeklife, networking, the social aspect, and the charity/service work; but i want to be honest and say that greekolife would be the perfect addition to my college experience... but how do i sqay that in a well-thought-out way?? how honest is too honest??

[33girl]

"I think I missed out on a lot of great times by not being Greek last year."

To say being Greek would be a "perfect addition to your college experience" sounds like it's something you can go to the store and purchase or like you're just trying to pad your resume.

[mahdian]

youre right it sounds dumb now that i think of it.. thanks so much!!

[BetteDavisEyes]

Hey ya'll !!!

I had a question about recruitment. I've already completed my freshman year but this past may i took a semester off to do an internship at disney.
therefore, i missed the 07 rush.

What i was wondering is since I missed this year's rush will that put me in a bad spot? I will be a sophomore when I rush in the fall. Also, I do attend college in the south.

And thank ya'll so much for posting this, this makes me feel so much better about rush, even though it's quite a few months away. :)

QFP

[varsitybluette]

A lot of people here have said don't mention drinking. Is it still all right to ask in passing if the chapter is dry? I'll be going through round 2 of recruitment later this week and one of the sororities I was interested in are apparently dry and I just wanted to make sure. It doesn't really matter to me, but I'd like to know still, you know? I wouldn't go on about it, but asking is still ok ... right?

[OTW]

A lot of people here have said don't mention drinking. Is it still all right to ask in passing if the chapter is dry? I'll be going through round 2 of recruitment later this week and one of the sororities I was interested in are apparently dry and I just wanted to make sure. It doesn't really matter to me, but I'd like to know still, you know? I wouldn't go on about it, but asking is still ok ... right?

http://www.greekchat.com/gcforums/showthread.php?t=89

Old thread, but it still has relevant info.

[alphagamzetagam]

They're apparently dry - how?

All the chapters are (or should be) dry during recruitment. Just like we say to PNMs don't mention drinking, the chapters are being told not to mention drinking.

Plus all NPC sororities are *supposed* to be dry all the time. As in, they don't have alcohol in their house.

If they're serious about being dry ALL the time, I would think they would mention it.

[varsitybluette]

See, I'm not sure, which is why I want to clarify with them. I wasn't the one they told it to, another girl who was in my group came up to the rest of us after we left the house and said that she asked about the social activities and all that and apparently they said they "pride themselves on being dry." I don't remember verbatim, but there might have been an "only" thrown in there as well. But yeah, I'm not entirely certain so ... it would just be nice to clarify, you know?

But you're probably right, they would have mentioned it if it was some adamant thing to them ... I just wasn't sure if it would be too bold to ask. lol

[Zillini]

Is an alcohol policy so important that it would change your opinion regarding a org?

If you must know then find out some other way. Asking during Recruitment can come across as either 1) you're a teetotaller who looks down on those who drink or 2) you're a party animal who is only looking for drinking buddies, not sisterhood.

[33girl]

See, I'm not sure, which is why I want to clarify with them. I wasn't the one they told it to, another girl who was in my group came up to the rest of us after we left the house and said that she asked about the social activities and all that and apparently they said they "pride themselves on being dry." I don't remember verbatim, but there might have been an "only" thrown in there as well. But yeah, I'm not entirely certain so ... it would just be nice to clarify, you know?

But you're probably right, they would have mentioned it if it was some adamant thing to them ... I just wasn't sure if it would be too bold to ask. lol

This is why I hate the term "dry" - it's confusing to non-Greeks.

No NPC sororities are permitted to have alcohol in their housing. No alcohol is permitted during recruitment.

However, at social events like mixers and formals, alcohol can be served to of-age members if the event is held at an appropriate venue and alcohol is served by a third party vendor.

Is an alcohol policy so important that it would change your opinion regarding a org?

Yes. If there is a chapter who doesn't allow its members - even those of age - to drink AT ALL, I would run in the other direction. Unless that's what you want, of course.

Hope that helped. :)

[alphagamzetagam]

I would think it would have made a difference in my opinion on an organization.

I would also think that if the chapter didn't set limits on alcohol consumption, including keeping a keg in the basement of the house or whatever, and are generally drunks - that might affect my decision, too.

[mahdian]

i have a serious interest in politics and the political world- is it okay to mention that many great politicians-mostly women of course!- have been a part of the greek system, and thats ONE reason why i want to be greek (of course worded better)? i would never mention any party affiliation, or discuss any political issue.

[alphagamzetagam]

NO. You can not treat Greek Life like a means to an end during recruitment!

[varsitybluette]

Is an alcohol policy so important that it would change your opinion regarding a org?

If you must know then find out some other way. Asking during Recruitment can come across as either 1) you're a teetotaller who looks down on those who drink or 2) you're a party animal who is only looking for drinking buddies, not sisterhood.

I said in my first post:
"It doesn't really matter to me, but I'd like to know still, you know?"

It's not like it's the deciding factor for me, but if they are completely dry, it's something to consider in the whole thing, you know? I'm not either a teetotaller or a party animal ... I just want as much information as I can get so I know what I'm getting myself into. But like I said, it doesn't really matter to me. So we'll see at Round 2, I guess :)

[varsitybluette]

This is why I hate the term "dry" - it's confusing to non-Greeks.

No NPC sororities are permitted to have alcohol in their housing. No alcohol is permitted during recruitment.

However, at social events like mixers and formals, alcohol can be served to of-age members if the event is held at an appropriate venue and alcohol is served by a third party vendor.

Hope that helped. :)

Thanks! It did :)

[OtterXO]

I said in my first post:
"It doesn't really matter to me, but I'd like to know still, you know?"

It's not like it's the deciding factor for me, but if they are completely dry, it's something to consider in the whole thing, you know? I'm not either a teetotaller or a party animal ... I just want as much information as I can get so I know what I'm getting myself into. But like I said, it doesn't really matter to me. So we'll see at Round 2, I guess :)

I would tread lightly on the topic of alcohol. Someone above gave the general NPC rules regarding alcohol and that sounds pretty much the information that you were relayed through a game of telephone with another PNM. Personally, when girls came through recruitment a