my rush: continued!!! [Archive] - GreekChat.com Forums

dzrose93

01-02-2002, 02:40 PM

Originally posted by ENDROAD
Have you guys considered how different your Rush is from African American sororities. These organizations would never think of posting the progress of rush online.

I am not ragging on anyone just wanting to open dialogue on this topic.:confused:

Yes, NPHC rush is very different from NPC sorority rush. However, I think the two groups use the systems that work best for them, and I don't see anything wrong with either type of rush.

XO_Princess

01-02-2002, 05:37 PM

Roxy-
Good luck, sweetie!! I can't wait to read your updates!!

PhiMuNursie

01-02-2002, 07:38 PM

I didn't know if you got my last message on the other thread, so I just wanted to post again.

Best of luck and like Hootie said, follow your heart!

Tara

---to practice day by day
love, honor, truth---

AOIIAngel

01-02-2002, 10:24 PM

Best of luck to you, and I cant wait to hear your story!!!!! Makes us nervous for them, right actives and alums?? ;)

aephi alum

01-02-2002, 10:30 PM

Good luck Roxy - keep us posted :)

SigKapSweetie

01-02-2002, 11:48 PM

Good luck tomorrow, sweetie! Make your own decisions and have fun! Don't forget that everything happens for a reason, and you will end up right where you belong. Give all the chapters a chance and be yourself. Okay, I think that's all the advice I got before rush...oh, and as a brilliant GCer said on another post, "Join a chapter full of girls like you, not like you want to become. You will all grow and mature together!" May the force be with you:D :D :D

KillarneyRose

01-03-2002, 12:17 AM

Good luck, Roxydiva! Have a great time going through rush! I know myself and all the other rush junkies on GreekChat are eagerly awaiting your reports! :)

shadokat

01-03-2002, 09:16 AM

Good Luck Roxydiva! Your rush sounds like so much fun!! I'm sure you'll have a great time, and you'll find the place where you fit in :) Can't wait to read your stories!

mmcat

01-03-2002, 09:18 AM

we're all with you...
have a ball
mmcat
:D

roxydiva

01-03-2002, 10:13 AM

welp. hate to say it. but i only got invited back to two houses. AGD and ADPi . while they were both nice, i didnt really like either one. so. i guess this is it. my rho chi said shed tell me about open recruitment later on, but she had to run to the first party. so. thanks for everything guys! i really appreciate all the support!!!! i might see about open recruitment, but who knows!!! i guess i got the wrath of the IU greek system :) i figure oh well though, better to be done after the 1st round, then go all the way through, be all attached, then get nothing! so thanks again everyone, you guys are incredible people!!!! if i do open recruitment, ill let you guys know!! :)

roxydiva

carnation

01-03-2002, 10:30 AM

Roxydiva, I hope you'll look into open rush--lots of fantastic women have found their Greek home that way and been happy that they could take their time. Let us know!

dzsaigirl

01-03-2002, 11:25 AM

Why couldn't you just go back to AGD and ADPi? I really wish that people would give the system a chance and trust the way it works.

Sue_XO

01-03-2002, 12:08 PM

Don't want to bump heads but I don't really think you have to "trust the system". We all know that 5000 names are put into a computer with 20 or so sororities and the computer does the matching. Trusting the system to make a choice means to me that IU Panhell would take time to examine each girl's personality and audit carefully.....would she fit with this sorority- with that huge greek life- we know that is impossible.

Roxy is trusting her heart which is what picking a sisterhood is all about. My 2 cents.

mmcat

01-03-2002, 12:12 PM

i'm sorry that you don't want to try to play this out.
definitely open recruiting...you make sure that they know you are interested and you keep a wide open mind.
things aren't over until you say they are..
lol
mmcat
:p :D

dzsaigirl

01-03-2002, 12:26 PM

I still find it sad that people drop out of rush when there are sororities who have invited them back. My roommate freshman year did that and later regretted it. You might as well give the groups a chance and then in the end, if you still don't feel right there, don't sign the bid card.

All that aside, and not a part of this discussion, I just want to share that not every school uses computer matching. Some places do it by hand which takes longer, but works when the system is smaller. I just didn't know if some of you knew that, since most people only know the computer system.

dzsaigirl

01-03-2002, 12:47 PM

Actually I did feel an instant connection to my sorority which I have never doubted. I knew from the first day of rush that I wanted to be a DZ.

However, this does not mean that I cannot still have the opinion that people should give other groups a chance.

I have not meant to sound rude in these posts, although I think that it has been taken that way. I was just trying to share my opinion that it doesn't hurt to give groups a chance. If nothing else, you will have been given the opportunity to meet people during rush who could end up being your friends.

My $19.02,

dzsaigirl

shadokat

01-03-2002, 12:51 PM

Roxy--

I'm so sorry you are deciding to drop out of recruitment now. I understand that from your first impression you may not be really into AGD and ADPi, but I would, like dzsagirl, encourage you to go to their parties and see what it's like. I know that someone on here posted during the Fall about going through recruitment and only getting invited back to one house. They figured they'd just go to their last party there and see what it was like, and if they didn't feel it, they wouldn't sign the bid card. They ended up loving it!!

If you still decide not to do the rest of recruitment, definitely look into open recruitment.

All the best to you :) I'm sure you'll find your way in the sea of sororities!

Sue_XO

01-03-2002, 12:53 PM

The words DZ and rude will never ever go together in my mind! It is just impossible- you gals are a top class act! :)

I will agree that I hate it when a girl goes into rush with the attitude- if I don't get into xyz- then I am dropping out and not pledging anyone at all - this before she has even step foot into a house! That is just setting yourself up for failure :eek:

Sue

roxydiva

01-03-2002, 01:46 PM

heres my defense! ;)

for the past couple weeks ive been fairly wishy washy about rushing anyway. i told myself that if for some reason i didnt get invited back to the 7 or 8 sororities i felt best at, id let it go. AGD and ADPi were 16th and 17th on my list (out of 19). with 19 houses here, i think everyone ive talked to whos rushed, or who is rushing, there are definite ones we have figured out that we dont fit in with. before i went into it, i told myself that id go everywhere i was invited, and wouldnt drop out unless i was completely cut. ive obviously, changed my mind. i have a weird situation going for me that i feel maybe is why i got cut from everywhere else. ive been trying to follow my gut and my heart though this whole time, and my heart is at peace with stopping now, and maybe doing open recruitment. i cant believe im NOT gonna go back to those houses, but i feel that its the right thing. like i said, i feel ok with the idea that i may not be in a sorority now, and thats aok with me. itd be fun, but its super competitive here!

i hope this doesnt sound snappy at all, cause that isnt my intention in the least. i just got back on here after my nap, and saw all the posts, and thought i would share what was going through my head, now that ive had time to let it settle. a girl in my group only got invited back to AXO, which had been my favorite. she didnt like them at all, but her sister is an AXO somewhere else. shes going to go anyway, and i applaud her for that. anyway just wanted to update you guys on where my head was!!! thanks again for being an incredible group of people! you all rock!!!! :)

roxydiva

valkyrie

01-03-2002, 02:11 PM

Good for you -- I think that you're probably right to trust your gut and not go back to houses that you didn't like -- as long as you are certain that you won't regret it later. I do understand what you're saying -- when I was an undergraduate and I went through rush, there were some houses that I would not even have considered -- that's just how it is sometimes.

This makes me think that the way IU does rush really sucks. They make people wait for months before finding out whether they'll be invited back anywhere -- I can't even imagine what that would feel like, especially when it ends in disappointment. If they want to do rush in January, why not just do it all in January? Here's my question, too -- why in the world do they make the rushees rank the houses after the first round? How stupid is it for people to have to rank houses, when they may not even get invited back to ANY? That just seems cruel and pointless to me.

roxydiva

01-03-2002, 02:37 PM

a side note as to why IU's rush can suck! a girl in my group is from michigan. she came back, like the rest of us, yesterday. she flew in. she had said something last night at the meeting about her grades being weird, because she transferred here, and her cumulative GPA wasnt right or something, it didnt include her IU semester gpa. my rho chi told me today, that they just found out today that she didnt make grades, so she didnt get any houses back. so, she came all the way from friggin michigan to find out she had no houses. she didnt know the grade thing was weird until she had already gone home for break. i dont know if a communication line broke down, and that couldve been fixed or what. rho chi said she thinks she was renting a car and driving home til sunday? i dont know. anyway yeah that sucks for us to come back, then find out "nope!!! no houses for you!"

and yes valkyrie, i feel that i can do what im doing, without regrets. thats the only way i would do this. i just sincerely believe that with 19 houses, no girl could feel that they would fit in at every single house!!! maybe im wrong, but thats just the way i think it happens with this many houses. but i do believe there are a handful of houses for everyone, but i guess my handful didnt want me :) thats ok though. open recruitment here i come! ;) have a good day folks!

roxydiva

Sue_XO

01-03-2002, 02:46 PM

I totally agree- if you go to 20 houses - I think that you should automatically be invited back to 1/2 of them. Any IU people out there -- what is the next stage- did some girls get invited back to 17 houses? It seems so out of whack.

GiantsChic

01-03-2002, 02:46 PM

sweetie, don't stress... i went through fall rush last semester, and was only offered a bid from the 2 houses i knew i didn't want to be in... the thing is i made it all the way to pref nite (last nite of rush) with my fav., and ewasn't offered a bid... i believe i'll be doing spring rush in a few weeks, but we'll see... i totally understand the disappointment and how you feel about not going back to the 2 houses. If you ever wanna talk, feel free to write to me, and we can chat :-)

valkyrie

01-03-2002, 02:53 PM

Roxy, you're so cute! I am sure that with your wonderful attitude, you will do well in open recruitment. I wish you nothing but the best!
:)

roxydiva

01-03-2002, 02:57 PM

sue-- today and tomorrow are the 12 party days, you can go back to a maximum of 12 houses, or however many you got back, but of course, with IU you have to go back to that many houses, or however many you got back. no picking and choosing here!!! saturday is 6 party, and sunday is 3 party (pref day) then monday night is bid night. hope that helps some!

valkyrie--thanks :D dont know why my attitude wasnt good enough to get me more than 2 houses back, but ah well!!! :) it happens, and im a firm believer in the idea that things happen for a reason.

roxydiva

HeidiHo

01-03-2002, 03:33 PM

I have no problem with you deciding not to go back, but I just want to add some insight.
Chi O was 5/7 after the first day for me. They worked their way up as the week went on, and I'd have hated life if I'd gone anywhere else.
Just like that girl getting invited back to your fav, but her not liking them, there's probably someone who's very envious of you because they'd die to become a Alpha Gam or ADII.
I hope you're happy and maybe give it another chance.
Heidi

Shelacious

01-03-2002, 04:26 PM

Because I have never been through a Rush, I guess I have a question: what is the advantage of dropping out of Rush now, rather than dropping out at the end, if any? Does it make any difference with one's chances during open recruitment?

BTW, I do agree with you totally HeidiHo because my experience was a little bit similar. Sometimes organizations select US because they need our insight, our spirit, our experiences. If I had looked only for the organization I thought would be the best fit for my own personality, I would probably have looked toward a different organization initially. Instead, I looked for women I could respect, an organization in whose principles I could believe, and a sorority that could best utilize my strengths while challenging me to cultivate new strengths outside my normal comfort zone.

Then again, if I knew that I would be bitter and miserable to my new sisters because I only wanted to join ABC, XYZ or EFG, but joined HIJ because that's all there was, I probably would not pursue membership any further.

sundevil2000

01-03-2002, 06:40 PM

Roxydiva,
I have been following your story on here and you seem to me like a really awesome girl. Those sororities dont know what they were missing out on! But still, you were so psyched about doing rush so in my opinion I think that you should follow through. You never know what could happen. So many people go through the first round of rush and only want xyz or abc but realize they were meant to be def. If you've already started, you should go back atleast once. Maybe you'll meet girls this day that you connect with and you just didnt realize cause you really wanted the other houses.

aephi alum

01-03-2002, 07:02 PM

Roxy, I'm sorry to hear things didn't work out during formal rush. :( Definitely do open recruitment - so many of us, including myself, have found our sisterhoods that way. Good luck, and keep us posted :)

33girl

01-03-2002, 09:22 PM

Roxy, I'm sorry things didn't work out for you during formal. Although I might have gone to the parties just to get the free food ;) I know you did what you felt in your heart was right.

I think the "wait over break" thing at IU does have merit - you get to think about it and not rush into it. But on the other hand, it is totally brutal to make people fly back from states away to come back to nothing. A lot of people work and visit family over break. It's wrong to take a week away from them if they have no clue what they are coming back to. I had assumed that if you got no invites back, the Panhel was considerate enough to inform you before you hauled your butt back to campus.

mmcat

01-03-2002, 10:40 PM

do what you need to do..
sounds to me that you would be a terrific asset to any goup...
just don't back down...
happy new year sweetie
mmcat
:) :p :D :cool:

jess_pom

01-03-2002, 11:40 PM

Roxy,
Don't worry about not getting invited back. Take this chance as an opportunity to show these girls that you are really interested. Go to their open bid parties, and be yourself. I'm not sure how many girls are going through rush, but being on the other side, i know that it can be overwhelming for the sisters to remember everyone. So, I suggest that you go back once the semester starts and try again. Also, try meeting sisters in classes and stuff and make friends with a few different girls, first. This will get you farther, in my opinion.

Anyway, good luck! I've been in a similar situation, and its rough right now, but I promise it will get better!

amycat412

01-03-2002, 11:57 PM

Originally posted by Shelacious
...I looked for women I could respect, an organization in whose principles I could believe, and a sorority that could best utilize my strengths while challenging me to cultivate new strengths outside my normal comfort zone.

VERY well said Shelacious!

One of the reasons going thru to the end of rush and then dropping out is not preferable is because if she signs a pref card and receives a bid and then rejects it-- she will not be eligible for informal/open recruitment.

:)
Amy

Peaches-n-Cream

01-04-2002, 12:20 AM

Roxy,
I hope that you decide to go through open bidding. With so many sororities out there, I am certain that you will find one that is a perfect fit. :D Good luck!

IUPDeeZee

01-04-2002, 12:43 AM

COB is really a great opportunity to meet sisters in a more natural setting without a strict party agenda. I think it would be worth your time to give it a shot...you may just find the perfect fit!

shadokat

01-04-2002, 09:27 AM

With a campus as large as IU and a greek system of similar size, I would hope that most sororities are hitting ceiling through formal recruitment. If that's the case, I worry that Roxy may end up with fewer choices. But in any case Roxy, you do what you need to, and we'll all still support you :)

Keep your chin up!

xp2k

01-04-2002, 11:49 AM

Oh no Roxy, it sounds like rush has gone for the worst?

I go to Indiana University and I understand what Roxy is going through...of sorts. I have had a great number of friends drop out of rush early because they didnt get the house that they wanted.

Roxy is right about IU's sorority rush being brutal. It's extremely competitive and less then half of the girls going through actually get bids!

I'm also going to sound a bit superficial...but I sort of understand her motives for not going to the two houses that invited her back. Some would say that
AGD and ADPi respectively have the lowest repuatations on the sorority "social ladder". Does it mean that they are bad houses?

NO, some of my best friends are in both and they are both a lot of fun. Its just that in a huge greek system with 19 big houses, someone has to be last.

I personally reccommend taking a second look at AGD. They have improved tremendously in the past 2 years and their girls are a lot of fun. They're no where near as bad as some houses would like you to think.

And then again, if you want to wait until open recruitment (I think that's what its called, I'm a guy so I dont know all of the complex sorority lingo), I say go for it, with the open mind that you are taking a chance. So many girls cut themselves during rush from an organization based on its social reputation and from meeting 50 million girls at a 30 minute "party". Im not saying that this is the case with you, I'm just saying what I've seen in the past.

Because of Pan Hel's super strict rules, a lot of houses were a girl or two shy of making quota...some even more. I have had friends who got cut from rush and get into great houses later. It will probably be safe to say that at least 3 houses will still be under quota at the end of women's recruitment. I wouldnt give up yet though. Greek life at IU is so much fun!

If you still have the chance, I say go for it!

XP2k

Shelacious

01-04-2002, 12:12 PM

Originally posted by amycat412

One of the reasons going thru to the end of rush and then dropping out is not preferable is because if she signs a pref card and receives a bid and then rejects it-- she will not be eligible for informal/open recruitment.

:)
Amy

Thanks so much Amy...that's exactly what I was wondering! :)

KarenC725

01-04-2002, 02:09 PM

My two cents:

I would definitely check out open rush. Most likely (from what;s been posted) those two houses will have COB anyway so you could give them a second look then.

I did it the other way around. I went through open rush and (long story) was dirty rushed. Oddly enough, the houses I went to during COB were not the houses I ended up liking during formal rush. That was just my experience though.

UMgirl

01-04-2002, 02:24 PM

Michigan system is the same except we only have 16 (but ti was still a pain in the you know what and computerized)
I can see everyones point in this.
For those who say she should go back, its because with this kinda system, especially on the first day....you only talk to each other for maybe 5 mins, and then get traded to maybe 2 others girls for a total of 15 mins. No matter what kind of feeling you get from the house it could be wrong, b/c you dont spend that much time there. Like on girl said when I rushed...this system blows, we dont really get to know you and you dont really get to know who we are. First impressions can be wrong give em a chance.
I can see Roxy's point though. When i went through formal rush out of 16 houses i was asked back to 4, and it didnt make me feel good. Only one was one that i wanted to go back to,. But i dropped. My rho chi called me and asked if I was sure about it, and I told her yes. But I regretted it that entire year.

However you should do what YOU feel is best for you.

COB can be awesome, but usually there are less houses to choose from, and the same houses you didnt want might be the only ones doing it. But COB is far more relaxed and you do spend more time with the girls.
I know there's the "system" which seems to be at larger schools and then alot of panhels at smaller schools (from what Ive seen) seem to have open houses and then you choose which houses you want to go to. I see flaws in both, but i personally would have like sorority rush to be the way fraternity rush was at my school. Go to as many as you want, and recieve as many bids as you want. It only as long as a week compared to 3 and was more relaxed and casual.
I also see alot of people saying that if she had of continued and rejected the bid that she wouldnt have been able to rush the following rush. Its funny cuz at UM your allowed to do that. I did it a semester. The only way you cant rush again, is if you accept a bid and then de-pledge or just dont show to the first couple of meetings. Funny :confused:

BrownEyedGirl

01-04-2002, 02:55 PM

Originally posted by UMgirl
The only you can rush again, is if you acceot a bid and then de-pledge or just dont show to the first couple of meetings. Funny :confused:
So if you don't get a bid the first time around then you can only join a GLO through COB?? :eek: That'd be very discouraging for PNM's who 'mismatch' or get cut early on.

UMgirl

01-04-2002, 03:00 PM

sorry :) had to go back and edit that. I meant they only way they wont allow you to rush again.
If you dont get one, you can rush anytime. If you get one but decline it, you can still rush anytime. If you get one and accept, but drop during any period before Initiation, you have to wait a full year, and it seems from another thread if you get a bid but decline you cant rush for a term. Just thought it was funny cuz you can do that at UM.